Look at this stud! Now listen to him!

Chris Coté’s Action Sports Podcast!

Michael Ciaramella

By

BeachGrit approved!

Chris Coté is something of a legend in the surf industry. Love him or hate him, you’d recognize his boyish and bespectacled profile just about anywhere. He’s like the white Masekela or the skinnier Drew Carey.

My introduction to Coté was through his work at Transworld Surf Magazine, where he helped build the most fun-loving surf rag in the States. I was pretty young at the time, but I vividly remember Coté getting grilled monthly in the Letters to the Editor section. He’d then reply with some sort of self-deprecating but inevitably victorious quip that would leave me rolling.

I don’t know this for sure but, based on his background in skating (and skating’s marvelous invention, King of the Road) Coté was likely the mastermind behind Transworld Surf’s Cali Rally — the high watermark in surfing extracurriculars.

But then Transworld went under in 2013 and Coté, the longtime Ed. in Chief, was without work. So what’d he do, sulk around aimlessly? Probably. Cry? Definitely. But eventually Chris recovered and leveraged his position in the surf world into a new profession: action sports broadcasting.

I use the term “action sports” because he covers both surf and skate, plus it’s in the name of his new podcast. I said his new podcast!

Monday M.A.S.S., or Monday Action Sports Show, although I’m fairly certain there’s an acronymical issue there, is the only podcast (to my knowledge) that offers weekly news on all things surf, snow, and skate. He’s currently five episodes into his new gig and, I’ll be honest, the first few aren’t so sexy but they’re getting better each time!

I’m particularly fond of Coté’s tone, which has the perfect blend of zest, ambivalence and satire. Much like anything written by Chas Smith, it’s hard to tell if Coté is praising or viciously roasting his subjects.

My favorite parts of Monday M.A.S.S include Coté’s downright assault on hi-perf longboarding (March 20th episode), his ongoing but unexplained feud with Robert Kelly Slater (most episodes), and his ability to lock in obscure sponsors like a standing-desk brand or a weed dispensary (every episode).

Peep it on iTunes!

Your friends at The Inertia remind you to stay high on life!
Your friends at The Inertia remind you to stay high on life!

The Inertia: “Weed steals your dreams!”

Chas Smith

By

Alt-right mountain blog stokes fear! Sows discord!

Alt-right sometime surf blog The Inertia has a list of enemies that stretches into the sunset. It includes, stories that don’t include lists, progressive shortboard surfing, Dane Reynolds, any lack of passive-aggression, enjoyable writing, getting to the point and above all marijuana.

Seven months ago, the Venice-adjacent gang entered into an official blood feud with marijuana, offering alternative facts in an attempt to create panic amongst the population. It is a tactic known as reefer madness. Shall we read and remember?

Yep, it ain’t all rainbows when it comes to reefer. There’s that little thing called addiction. And whether it’s mental or physical, addiction is very much a reality in the legalization movement. Dr. Samuel Ball, the CEO of the National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse, sat down with Tech Insider to discuss the realities of today’s manufactured marijuana and its dangerous potency. Aside from the addictive mental properties in the plant, there’s also the damage it does to the lungs when smoked, which scientists still don’t know much about. Something to think about.

Yesterday, the Distributor of Ideas pushed out a questionable story pulled from an “expert” who claims that marijuana steals your dreams. Shall we read and laugh?

Business Insider recently spoke with pharmacologist, Dr. Samoon Ahmad about the effects of marijuana on our dreams. He goes into REM sleep and the fact that pot actually suppresses dreams. Beware of the rebound affect: stop smoking herb before bed and dreams can become wildly vivid.

Hmmmmm.

I mean ha!

Lakey Peterson
One year after snapping her ankle on a dirty hunk of backwash at home in Santa Babs, Lakey Peterson came into the Full-Rotation project with gusto! | Photo: Jason Kenworthy

BeachGrit TV: Girl Goes Into Orbit #3

Derek Rielly

By

Lakey flies to Mexico with Filipe! Lesson one! Open your shoulders, turn head!

Sometimes, what the hell, go out and have a swing. Right?

And, so, here it is, Colima, rancheros country south of Manzanillo where Jalisco and Sinaloa cartels fight over control of the port. Where houses are surrounded by electric fences and a knock on the door causes the master to stiffen, look around, and whisper,

“Is anybody expecting a visitor?”

Where the army blocks highways, soldiers outfitted with bulletproof vests and the sexy-as-anything Mexican-designed assault rifle, the FX-05.

At the airport, the customs officer says, “Stay safe.”

In the town that serves as the base for our project where Filipe Toledo, and Brett Simpson, attempts to coach, and coax, Lakey Peterson into a full-rotation air, fire crackers pop from dawn to midnight, mimicking machine-gun fire.

The beaches are empty. A series of wanton peaks, begging you to swallow their spoonfuls.

In this, the penultimate episode of our Girl Goes into Orbit series, Filipe and Brett instruct Lakey on how to erase a too-low bottom turn, why she shouldn’t grab her rail pre-flight, how to open the shoulders and why a face in an armpit ain’t necessary the stuff of kink.

Watch here!

(And if you missed ’em, here’s episode one – how to build a board that flies, and episode two – A brief history of full-rotation airs.)

World numbers 2, 7, and 4 have no clue why they are such!

WSL: What’s My Seed?

Michael Ciaramella

By

Hope you brought your abacus!

The WSL has released the Margies heat draw and it is a doozy. I’m particularly keen for heats two (Kolohe vs. Fanning vs. Leo), six (John vs. Wiggolly vs. wildcard (#prayforJackorJay)), and eleven (Julian vs. Italo vs. Ethan).

But thinking about the event’s seeding, an important question comes to light. Why is world number one, Owen Wright, in the seventh seed? He’ll be wearing the yellow jersey in WA, but he won’t be facing wildcards. Instead, John retains the number one seed, followed by Gab and Jordy at two and three — though they actually switched spots since Snapper.

So, if Margie’s seeding isn’t based on this year’s standings nor last year’s end of season’s ratings, how does the WSL decide to rank individual surfers? Surely all the CT surfers must be asking, “What’s my seed?!” I contacted the WSL’s velvety mouthpiece, Dave Prodan, to find out.*

As it goes, beginning-of-the-year seeding functions within a specific algorithm. It looks like this:

Event 1 (Gold Coast): 100% 2016 / 0% 2017
Event 2 (Margaret River): 80% 2016 / 20% 2017
Event 3 (Bells Beach): 60% 2016 / 40% 2017
Event 4 (Rio de Janeiro): 40% 2016 / 60% 2017
Event 5 (Fiji): 20% 2016 / 80% 2017
Event 6 (Jeffreys Bay): 0% 2016 / 100% 2017

Because Owen started the year in the #1 Wildcard seed of thirteen and went on to win the Snapper event, his Margies seed will come 80% from the number thirteen and 20% from number one. When averaged and compared to the other surfers at the top of the rankings, Owen falls into the seven slot. Meanwhile John, who is working off 80% of one and 20% of three, retains the top seed.

The scale is slowly shifted throughout the season until JBay, when the 2017 standings take over the current seeding structure.

I will say, tentatively, that I agree with this system. Much like round three’s questionable reseeding plot, it’s a bit capitalistic in nature — the rich stay rich, the poor stay poor etc. But for the sake of the world title race it’s probably better than letting Snapper wholly dictate the seedings. Though, I can see how a 2017-centric seeding system would create more interesting heats earlier on in events, which is always a plus.

Now I’m all ears, kids. Is the WSL correct in maintaining the status quo, or should they open up the seedings and let all hell break loose? The latter is beginning to sound infinitely more fun…

* Technically this convo took place in 2016, and a similar article was written for Surfing Magazine (now residing on Surfer‘s site), but I figured this topic was worth rehashing on BeachGrit’s enlightened forum!

Hero: New Yorker wins Surfer of the Year!

Chas Smith

By

A gentle New Yorker braves nor'easter and wins hearts!

You, of course, know the local news “there is a storm/hurricane/snow/wind/big waves so lets go to the beach and snag a surfer” trope. Rarely are the segments any good. The interviewer is always trite and the surfer being interviewed usually deer-in-the-headlights. Oh there have been exceptions like this one from a decade ago…


…but generally poor.

Except look at this fine young man in New York City! The way he casually tries to avoid the camera, his surprise that he is being called over even though he is the only person within miles, his yellowed Xanadu, his puckishness in asking for a ride and the fact that this was his first time surfing ever because he heard it’s good to surf when the wind is offshore.

I think he may be the perfect surfer. He is the one that belongs on our hundred dollar bill.

Speaking of which… should we start our own currency? Now seems like a good time.

Photo: Steve Sherman/@tsherms
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