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Sydney: “Gladiatorial exercise in futility!”

Chas Smith

by Chas Smith

CNN puts Australia's second favorite city in its crosshairs!

One of my great pleasures is when the mainstream media (#msm #fakenews #failing #lowratings) covers surfing and this morning I was very satisfied with Donald J. Trump’s number one enemy CNN’s take on surfing in Sydney. Let’s read from the top.

Surfing. It conjures up images of exotic locales, palm-fringed shorelines, adventure and discovery and of a lifestyle that basks in the sun’s warming embrace. While Tahiti or The Solomons offer this dream in abundance, Sydney’s version of donning rubber or boardshorts has become a gladiatorial exercise in frustration and at times futility.

Welcome to the combative nature of urban surfing. Sydney style.

While that iconic movie, “The Endless Summer,” may echo in older memories, Sydney surfing is a juxtaposed conundrum of how far we’ve come and of how much we’ve lost. The simple pleasure gained from one good turn, a cover up, or the chance to meditate upon the day, belies the stark reality of crowded line-ups, localism, injuries, and competition for waves.
Where to surf in Sydney has become an endless question.

Does this sound like surfing in Sydney to you? Has CNN captured the essence?

The top places to surf are then listed in what appears to be random order.

1) Garie Beach: “An entry fee is required.”

2) Shark Island: “A deposit of skin is the usual transaction required should you not judge the takeoff correctly.”

3) Wanda Beach: “The location for the 1980s coming-of-age movie, “Puberty Blues.”

4) Palm Beach: “Go to the kiddies corner.”

5) Macca’s: “If you make it out unscathed, it’s a short walk to a beer at the Bondi Icebergs.”

6) Curl Curl: “you should find a wave to satisfy your surfing appetite.”

7) Whale Beach: “Situated amongst some of the most expensive real estate in Sydney.”

8) Long Reef: “Keep your head down.”

9) Narrabeen: “Frequent close-outs and rips.”

10) Bilgola Beach: “One of the most satisfying.”

Does this seem like a fine enough assessment or will you take to Twitter and post short videos of you smashing CNN in the face?