Albee Layer wipeout
"I feel like Jaws owes me one now," says the pop-gun pithy Maui surfer Albee Layer.

Just in: Jaws Busts Albee Layer!

Pop-gun pithy Hawaiian Albee Layer takes gas at Jaws! Not spinal, but close!

An hour ago, Maui’s Albee Layer made an appearance on Instagram, trussed up in spinal care equipment, with the message:

“So I’m alive and luckily no fractures in my neck or spine tons or muscle and other damage but nothing that will stop me from a quick recovery. I feel like Jaws owes me one now. Really hope there’s a redemption swell before the year ends.”

What a year it’s been for name surfers, usually immune from the worst of injuries, suddenly thrust into emergency wards all over Oahu and Maui.

“So I’m alive and luckily no fractures in my neck or spine tons or muscle and other damage but nothing that will stop me from a quick recovery. I feel like Jaws owes me one now. Really hope there’s a redemption swell before the year ends.”

Do you remember at the Pipe Masters when Bede Durbidge busted his pelvis and had his stomach and ligaments ripped from the bone, requiring a 17cm metal rod and four screws to harness the girdle back in shape?

Evan Geiselman was knocked unconscious at Pipe was saved from death only by the strong hands of a bodyboarding stud. 

Owen Wright, who fabulously won the Fiji Pro, was belted so hard at Pipe and suffered a brain injury so traumatic he’s struggling with amnesia and rumours surround his current condition. Can he talk? Does he need help standing?

The list of well-wishers for Albee is long, and include the chair-ridden Bede Durbidge (“Feeling for you man @johnjohn_slater speedy recovery mate 🙏”).

Do you remember Albee Layer’s blood feud with “72 Heroes”?

Is today’s wounding a karmic rebuttal for Albee’s loose tongue?

Or is karma a dumb concept cooked up by human beings adrift in the world and unable to accept the essential chaos of being?

BeachGrit sends Albee its best wishes for a quick recovery etc…

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Trogan Fan
Trogan Fan
10 years ago

I haven’t seen a “help Albee pay his medical bills” thread yet – could a pro surfer actually have insurance? God (and yes, that’s a direct invite to Nick Dee) bless Obamacare.

longtom
longtom
10 years ago

Considering what’s been going on this El Nino winter I’d say this establishes the essential safety of big wave surfing.
How the fuck was no-one broken in two in that last Mav’s gore-fest?

NEGATRON
NEGATRON
10 years ago

OK, line in the sand before someone dies. Now that the paddling hierarchy has been established at jaws, those dudes that charged and got a name for themselves may return to towing. Old-School Hawaii enforcement would be fully encouraged to help regulate the lineup.

Nick Dee
Nick Dee
10 years ago
Reply to  NEGATRON

Another example of karma Nega. Thanks for the revelation. You’re a prophet..

Trogan Fan
Trogan Fan
10 years ago

is rock science trickier than other sciences?

Negatron, do your job here bru.

NEGATRON
NEGATRON
10 years ago
Reply to  Trogan Fan

Every website forum has to have a least one nutjob conspiracy poster… Nick Dee is that guy here… In saying that, Im getting pretty sick of him and that post is {was} just a unrelated mix of plain stupid and crazy.

Nick Dee
Nick Dee
10 years ago
Reply to  NEGATRON

Lol…censorship. I was simply educating that karma does not mean because you stepped on an ant you end up dying in a car accident. Karma is because you decide to surf in huge waves you will inevitably get hurt. It ain’t rocket science.

NEGATRON
NEGATRON
10 years ago
Reply to  Nick Dee

Loose tongues and getting hit by a truck sounded like a thinly veiled threat or “karma” as you call it.

Fahking Haole
Fahking Haole
10 years ago

Whoa, what? And was that a paid-for upvote?

david fffff
david fffff
10 years ago

You’re more annoying than caviera

velobwoy
velobwoy
10 years ago
Reply to  david fffff

Not possible, david f.

Seaman
Seaman
10 years ago

What the fuck….Derek’s article was spot on….Jews…Palestine… You are on the wrong site my friend

Badger
Badger
10 years ago

I knew surfing big waves was bad for you. This is proof that I’ll stick to being a total pussy in 2ft beach breaks.

Seaman
Seaman
10 years ago
Reply to  Badger

You gotta be careful with those as well. In Hawaii people know that between 3 to 8 is a situation where most people get hurt. Some of those 5 footers will drain all the water in front of the wave and slam you like you fell off the roof. Bedes injury was like that. On a bigger day at Pipe the wave will have a little more water to fall on…

wincy
wincy
10 years ago
Reply to  Seaman

He said 2ft beach breaks.

Badger
Badger
10 years ago
Reply to  wincy

Yeah but read his advice thoroughly. I’ve printed it out. Considering laminating it to my board.

mybrothersajunkie
mybrothersajunkie
10 years ago

‘Cough’


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