Introducing Surf Boss!
Ooooee somebody sure should have participated in Sober October this year and I don’t mean Kelly Slater. Well, I had fun and enjoyed testing BeachGrit‘s fibers with some radical honesty and did you ever fall for that early-2000s self-help program? Radical Honesty? If I remember correctly you were supposed to walk around telling everyone they were fat to their faces then reach enlightenment.
I feel we came close yesterday and I only wish that we had been conducting the session aboard Montara Boats’ new Surf Pontoon. One of us hitting the lip on the perfect wave peeling off behind us. All of us mocking the poor form etc. practicing our Radical Honesty.
And you know how little I care for fresh water. You know that I am a salt man to my bones but this Surf Pontoon sounds better than a wave pool and much cheaper too. Here’s a little taste from boatingindustry.com:
Minnesota-based Montara Boats is excited to announce an industry first, a pontoon boat you can surf behind. After extensive research and development, Montara has developed a patent-pending design that blends the comfort of a pontoon boat with the performance of an inboard surf boat.
“For the past 15 years I’ve watched neighbors and friends buy tow boats for water sports in addition to pontoons for entertaining. We’ve cracked the code on this and figured out how to blend these, creating the Surf Boss that does it all,” said Montara CEO Mark Overbye.
Ending the frustration of having to compromise performance for comfort, size and space, Montara’s new Surf Boss is available in three lengths, 21 feet, 23 feet, and 25 feet.
Equipped with PCM inboard engines, the Surf Boss features competitive surf wakes, a fully enclosed head, over 100 cubic feet of storage, dual swiveling captains chairs, jumbo-sized dual transom loungers that flip from forward to aft viewing.
Initial deliveries are expected to arrive dealer show rooms beginning in late December. Surf Boss street pricing is anticipated to range from about $65,000 to $75,000 for respective 21-foot to 25-foot Surf Boss models.
For some time now, I’ve wondered if the future of inland surfing was right under our noses all along (buy here!). The Surf Boss can run 42 mph with 6000 lbs ballasts, a weight that causes most wake boats to wallow. Imagine if you could get that up to 12000 lbs? It’d barrel right overhead like a moving miracle!
I’m telling you true, this is the future. I know because I’ve reached enlightenment.
Would you buy?
Are you in?
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In a front zip spring no less
The fucken fuel bill on this thing will make Surf Ranch look cheap.
2/2500 kg of boat + 5500 ish kg of ballast + payload of fuel + humans + everything else travelling at 30 odd knots – haaahaaaahaaaa. Not enough length – not enough beam on what has to be a semi displacement hull at 25’ to throw up a decent size wake. Fuck me drunk.
Fools. Yea it might work but – at a huge cost.
This is redefining “hauling arse”.
Yep that’s wake for you
Dear Surf Boss. I’ve been working hard for you, can I have a raise?
You can work remotely.
Signed, Surf Boss.
Hundred k AUD and free sleep overs for the Beschens.
I’ll build you one for ninety.
An hour of bobcat n tipper, a long wide roll of tarp, and a bunch of long hoses connected to your neighbours tap oughtta do it
Chas, you’ll be happy to learn that ABC(Channel 7) just today got radically honest with viewers. Scheduled today from 3-4pm was World of X-Games: Inaugural Stab High Invitational. I thought to myself “hey, let’s see how Stab celebrated death”. When I clicked on to Channel 7, I found enlightenment. Well not mine. But Channel 7’s. For there broadly casted was Stihl Saw Cutting Competiton. The program info said Stab High Invitational surf event but all I saw was chainsaws abuzzing, axes achopping, saws asawing and wood chip aerialing!! No Stab High Invitational. No jumps over amoebas sitting at the coffee table. Someone at Channel 7 must read Beach Grit. And after they ‘saw’ the CDC report, they knew what had to be seen. And it wasn’t gonna be Stab lies if s/he could do something about it.
O2,are you sure those woodcutters weren’t making coffins or crucifixes ? ( and coffee tables of course ? )
I once on a whim contacted City Wave (the one the Beschens surf at Munich airport or wherever) to find out how much it would cost to get one built here in Oz. I had visions of building a pimp my crib style party house for crypto billionaires and visiting Russian oligarchs that would have a stationary wave running through the middle of the grand ballroom. Anyway they wanted a million euro for what is essentially water running over a foam hump. Fuck that.
Just build your own
It’s just a matter of time until they make a surf tank that can fit in somebody’s backyard that is wealthy and has an acre or two.
got 1400sqm block just gotta convince the wife to bulldoze the house to make a tank and we are away
Can she swim ?
not great and probably wouldn’t like sleeping in a shed or tent!!
Then don’t forget ( if you go for the slater model ) to incorporate a sleeping car on the wave making train ?
If go slater model I want a “bullet train” to reset the sled!! so no time for naps
Dining car
Good idea . I think I can , I think I can ……………..toot toot .
Naw, think Matthew Mc connahe is gonna have the first home tank.
Really?? I can picture him on the bongos jamming with Slater and jack johnson
Waco?
Is Radical Honesty anti-depressive? (Asking for a friend).
Are you skinny?
I carry my weight well mostly. (Sometimes “festively plump”)
“Jolly”?
No, just the occasional burrito baby.