So deadly it should come with a Parental Advisory warning!
The very famous poet T.S. Eliot once mused, “This is the way the world ends. Not with a bang but a whimper.” and while I both appreciate the art form and the sentiment have to disagree for the world will neither end with a bang nor a whimper but with the sound of the World Surf League’s president of content, media and WSL Studio’s new SUP’s new foil sawing through your jugular vein.
Something like a gurgle.
Or maybe a choked gasp.
And what possessed our dear president of content, media and WSL studios to exchange his normal mode of transportation, the @infinity_sup #blurrV2, for 18th century France’s favorite tool? I cannot honestly say. I cannot even honestly speculate.
President Logan himself writes, “Super #sundayfunday on the @kalamaperformance @gofoil setup. Been quite some time since we FLEW the GoFoil. Waves were PERFECT and fun. Thanks to @jawadchabib for the pic. Foil Squad @legrandebeachhomes & @nikaukai with support of @ballred @ryharrisshapes #somewhatLOYALtothefoil #neededahaircut #justatadrusty”
Maybe there’s a clue in the hashtags? Like, why is “loyal” capitalized in #somewhatLOYALtothefoil? An acronym maybe? Lopping Off Your Auburn Locks? Is #needahaircut code for “I am going to scalp some folk today…” ?
More questions than answers.
But one more.
Would you rather surf knowing there is a Great White shark prowling around underneath or with President Logan next to you on a SUP foil?
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I was completely unaware of the cali surf culture, been riding waves and slopes since I was a wee lad, (back east conn.) but didnt understand the real deal till I moved to SD in 1972. Man you could surf everyday of the year!! I was in full surf addiction mode then…..Managed to somehow burn the heaviest of heavy toothless(fighter) hardcore local my first summer. Or maybe he just fell off and wanted to blame me!!! Serious beach SCREAMING…..I just hid in between the waves….man. I think he may have gone to jail for serious things, or OD’d Met some cooler Sunset Cliffs guys, where my folks had moved, and got adopted into one small section of that tribe. (you know, one break, one crew at that time) Quote: “we thought you had a nice bottom turn” haha…good guys, good times.
Yah, crazy times, I moved to SB to go to school, and its a bit more my speed. Im just glad I didnt succumb to what happened to so many awesome surfers. down there and everywhere for that matter….Adrenaline chasing through, fighting, sex, drugs, smuggling crazy stuff….close call tho.
is it me or are all things fucking surfing up coming out of the USA yep and the includes Hawaii bra -pro surfing c0mps – pop outs – boogie boards , Tow surf – Sups – Foils – where will it end you money hungry cunts
I got my first barrel view in the riptide right at the OB pier. 1972,,,I was an eastcoast transplant, to Pt Loma….didnt understand localism etc. ahh the memories… uggg! saw my first street party turned riot, guy stole a cops gun in a fight and just went running down the street waving it. Totally skiidded and bounced hard off his hip, just popped up and kept running. Kinda cool welcome to Cali!!! I guess I got there when it calmed down too!!
At least with a Great White you’ve got a chance of survival!
No, I moved to Kauai in 2001. I still get back every few years though to visit family and friends. The day that Jerry died, we were sitting at the street front windows at South Beach Bar and Grill for a full view of all the mourners and wailers thinking about ending it all to join Jerry. “Energy” hugs lasting 90 seconds, full grown adult dirty hippies brought to their knees on a public street looking skyward while tears streamed down their cheeks. Just a full view of the bottom of Newport and The Wall. Pretty interesting viewing and watching historic moment go down while eating fish tacos and drinking pints of beer. I didn’t go to the drum circle, but I could hear it from my place near Dog Beach.
Like porn, the initial fascination quickly turns to repulsion
Here it is. WSL strategy in full swing.
https://www.nytimes.com/201…
I was in OB that day too, and walked down to Newport Avenue to get some food and go to the bar with some friends. I remember full grown men hippys walking around on Newport just crying in public and looking lost and aimless. Like a flock without a Shepard.
All jokes aside, the WSL and their team are so out of touch with the average surfer in the lineup it’s not even funny anymore
It’s a good thing Ziffy has money because employing this fucktard and thinking it’s going to be profitable he’s just as fucking deluded.
No Elo! No!
Foil SUPing is the OPPOSITE of getting barreled. No human on the planet has ever been barreled on a foil. I know Oprah probably full-voice-whispered in you ear “why not you?” But here’s why not. Because even Kai Lenny hasn’t been foil-shacked yet.
Are you pretending that you are better than Kai Lenny? For shame Elo, for shame.
Let’s just, yet again, shake this off and get back on track and get you goddamn motherfucking tubed. You certainly aren’t going to get pitted on such a small day anyway, but you could find a little shore break and at least work on getting quick. You could body surf or body board some thigh high dredgers just to get a feeling for trimming in the tube.
Foil SUPing might seem like innocent fun but think about it like this: you’re trying to get your lady pregnant and you’re jerkin’ off. Sure she might not be in town today, but you need to be ready to deliver the goods when the opportunity presents itself. So, again, eyes on the prize Elo! Think quick on steep, think crouching, think hanging in there longer than you feel comfortable even if today’s not the day. Quit wacking it in the slow rolling mushburgers with the rest of the not-marriageable pervs who are steering you wrong.
Okay, some frank talk, but we’re all friends here. See you in the slot when it shows itself – we know you’ll be ready!
I have a theoretical meeting with Elo coming up soon. How many days for you to get him barreled? Beach of your choice.
Well it would have to be up here in Washington, but the locals would kill him in the first ten minutes ….
God this meeting better happen. Do you need a tape recorder carrier or something? I think I’d be good at that job.
Ha ha ha, so here for this. BEST.
Not really!
Went surfing with Tom yesterday and he lent me a wider (20”) epoxy board. About as floaty as my current PU one but caught waves easier width-wise. Got a couple but kooked’em.
Am encouraged.
Just need watertime x 1000.
Is the sell-by date past AF?
The day Jerry Garcia died, I remember thinking that we should all be thankful that Phish was still touring so the displaced hippy crisis could be tackled (dead) head on.
Q: How many Deadheads does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: They just wait for it to burn out and follow it around for 30 years.
Ya and seem to only show up when there’s any WSL bashing!
a hippy?
I quote the late great Mickey Dora ” I just pull into the barrel and all the boogie boards, knee boards, politicians, SUP. foilers and all getting pitched over the falls in to the rocks, it’s just beautiful”. Hey Ben you can chime in a correct me anytime!
Thank you for the Dora quote. Da Cat lives!
Have we arrived at the cul de sac of civilization and dignity as we know it? All signs point to yes https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
One thing I am in favor with all this is the head placement directly behind the foil when paddling out – what could possibly go wrong with that?
God will sort them out
Or Darwinian theory
Either way we’re good
nuke the entire site from orbit. It’s the only way
That quiet place round from Merewether has its own foil-troll. Also a menace on a SUP.
Edit: in all fairness, he is at least competent and occasionally mini-mals it.
“Occasionally mini mals it” doesn’t make it any better.
I’ll keep a close eye on the situation.
Ha!