Kelly Slater and Laird Hamilton vanquished!
I was very busy sailing over the past four days, hunting surf off California’s Channel Islands, running up scraggly hills, throwing rocks at prickly pears, editing forthcoming book and sipping mezcal from small pewter cups with four wonderful friends. It was a good time, great even, but I missed the last two days of stunning Quiksilver Pro competition. Well, not missed, I suppose because of Longtom. He writes better than I see and I’m overjoyed not to let my eyes get in the way of the truth and importance of professional surfing.
Italo beat Kolohe, as you know, and Caroline Marks upset Steph Gilmore but Steph should not be sad for she has just been officially declared “World’s Greatest Surfer.”
“Who declares who is the ‘World’s Greatest Surfer’ and how do they decide?” I hear you ask, with an incredulous edge to your voice, and I’ll tell you. It is decided by the editorial boards of Vanity Fair, Vogue, Esquire, Elle, ESPN and/or Guns & Ammo magazines. It is the surfer that grabs a “World’s Greatest Surfer” headline.
Now, Kelly Slater and Laird Hamilton have been passing the award back and forth for thirty years running. John John almost snagged the baubles three-years-ago but didn’t have a “face for media” as they say. And now we have Steph.
Elle magazine has a gorgeous new long form piece on the new “World’s Greatest Surfer” titled “Stephanie Gilmore is the World’s Greatest Surfer. Pay her accordingly.”
I don’t know how much Steph makes but I would bet all my own money that it’s more than Italo Ferreira.
And do you think Kelly Slater and Laird Hamilton are sad or do you think they will throw her a welcome to the club party?
If I’m honest, I would not want Kelly Slater and Laird Hamilton to throw me any sort of party. Imagine what the two would serve. Purps with added Laird Hamilton SuperFood Creamer festooned with ice from the ice bath we all just got out of.
Yuck.
Yeah, mixed with collies.
They just drop dead at 15 usually
Ha ha ha oh shit! We’re all fucking doomed!
Look just pay them more for the next 42 years and be done with it.
I had a cross between your two, sorely missed. Wish they lasted longer.
You’re gonna love that dog, but you’re gonna have to work it, daily. They love it.
This time Santa Cruz and Anacapa. We were headed to Santa Rosa but hideous head winds. Santa Cruz was absolutely next level.
Awesome
Go the the little Aussie cattler
This is exactly true — as a writer, you’re both part of the events you’re writing about, and also placed outside of them as an observer. The degree to which you acknowledge this dynamic and place yourself into the story openly, depends on the conventions of the story or outlet. Definitely I show up more in the stories I do here than I would in a third-person feature elsewhere.
Daww, thank you — I like writing about the random stuff that happens. It’s fun. And it’s nice to have an outlet where there’s plenty of room to play.
To be fair, I’d much rather watch Steph surf than either Laird or Kelly
Ummm, Mr. Chas, with all respect, etc.,
Don’t you have an F’ing job? Recently you’re eating upscale sushi, adjacent to stars, and now galavanting in the most exclusive US islands?!!!
Reminds me of when there’s a good swell and you coincidentally see all your pals in the water, but no one dares to ask the others how they got the day off!
Ha! And I won’t have a job if I don’t finish the book I was supposed to be editing when drinking mezcal from little pewter cups…
I bet she can charge 1 foot slop at D-Bah!
laird surfs a shortboard as well as a 12 year old.
Steph about has good as 15 year old boy
Well, chicks do say they’re better at multitasking so that makes sense.
Or blue heeler
Is that yours?
One of the best!!
“It was decided by the leading editorial boards of VALs mind provoked media”.
There I fixed it.
Clearly paid and bought by WSL
I’m getting a t-shirt that says
BEACH GRIT
ONLY 20%SHIT.
so you’ll recognise me!👍
It was good cause he was there.
Can you do pipe this year per favor?
There’s a good chance I’ll be helping GMed get chaired up the beach this year.
Can I just use a thumbs up there, cause I feel lame throwin shakas.
Did you see me claiming that one?
How embarrassing.
You can take a boat from Ventura! I have not done this, but I know it is possible and pretty rad.
I guess sometimes being a writer feels a bit boring, because it’s a lot of time sitting at a keyboard. And some of the people I write about have done crazy amazing things — and I’m like, uh, well, here I am, typing at my kitchen table, I guess.