To be very honest, I don’t know when this news actually broke or how. I don’t know if our World Surf League hung red, white and blue bunting around the Lemoore facility then hung a sign reading, “New Name, Same Great Service!”
I don’t know if other surf and surf-based websites ran weeks of “exclusive” coverage, really getting into the weeds, calling their favorite professional surfers for quotes etc.
I don’t know if our World Surf League President of Content, Media and Studios Eric “ELo” Logan took out a full-page advertisement in the failing New York Times declaring, “We live in radically inclusive times where dreams trump artificial, confining, patriarchal ‘reality.’ Today, Bruce Jenner can become Caitlyn. Today, freshwater is as good for surfing as saltwater.”
All I know is that, yesterday, Jen See texted to wonder if I had plans on going to the Surf Ranch Pro. I responded, “When is? Fall?”
She came right back, “probs sept? idk”
Then clearly went and looked at the World Surf League’s website because followed, seconds later, with “sept 19. ha ha fuck now called ‘the freshwater pro.'”
I couldn’t get any work done for the rest of the day, spending all my precious time thinking about this new Freshwater Pro. Just thinking of all the amazing things that could be done.
Like, they should stock it with bass, bring back one-time announcer and professional bass fisherman Todd Kline to call the action from the “channel” while also participating in a concurrent bass fishing tournament.
It could be co-sponsored by Salty Crew and/or The Mad Hueys.
That’s mostly as far as I got.
What would you do with this new Freshwater Pro?