"Five people I know died within two weeks of being vaccinated," says Kelly Slater.

The eleven-time world surfing champion Kelly Slater has broken his silence on the Novak Djokovic visa cancellation in a series of candid comments and challenges to readers on a New York Times Instagram post.

A real quick explanation for those who came in late.

World number one tennis player Novak Djokovic, who ain’t into COVID vaccines, secured a vax exemption to compete at the Australian Open in Melbourne, which, amid a rising furore from Australians, was quickly cancelled by the country’s PM.

 

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When the New York Times posted the story on Instagram, Slater teed off with his claim Melbourne’s citizens had been brainwashed by its state masters, developing a bond with their captors during six lockdowns totalling 262 days after COVID kicked off worldwide in March 2020.

“Maybe Stockholm Syndrome can now change its name to Melbourne/Australia Syndrome,” wrote Slater. “It’s sad to see the celebrated division by the “virtuous” vaccinated. If you’re vaccinated why are you concerned/worried about anyone else’s status… unless, of course, it doesn’t protect you? Or you’re scared you’ll catch it or upset you had to take the risk of vaccination yourself? So much brainwashed hatred in people’s hearts regardless of vax status.”

Replies and responses followed, Slater  clearly enjoying the chance to educate his many fans.

Here’s a taste.

“This is not a fight for the libertarian world, this is not just a fight for Novak, but a fight for the whole world!”

Yesterday came the news, in a roundabout sorta way, that vaccine sceptic Kelly Slater was still a chance to surf the Australian leg of the tour after world number one tennis player Novak Djokovic secured a vax exemption to compete at the Australian Open in Melbourne.

The decision sparked fury among residents of the most shuttered city in the world who lived through six lockdowns totalling 262 days after COVID kicked off worldwide in March 2020.

Exemptions can be given for reasons such as anaphylactic response to the COVID vaccine, a poor response to vaccination or having had Covid in the last six months.

It wasn’t revealed what reason the Serbian star, who is “personally opposed to vaccination”, gave for his exemption.

Anyway, Australia’s PM stepped in, obvs motivated by the chance to score some easy political points amid a rising fury of his handling of the crisis, tweeted, “Mr Djokovic’s visa has been cancelled. Rules are rules, especially when it comes to our borders. No one is above these rules. Our strong border policies have been critical to Australia having one of the lowest death rates in the world from Covid, we are continuing to be vigilant.”

Djokovic’s daddy was real sad, telling a radio station, “This is not a fight for the libertarian world, this is not just a fight for Novak, but a fight for the whole world!”

The Djokovic decision had opened the door to the greatest of all time to give Australians one more chance to examine his whipped-out flayed heel-ground turns, those little Slater Designs rails sunk to the hilt.

Now, probs no.

Slater, of course, hasn’t been shy in expressing his opinion of the pandemic.

“This is clearly a disease of obese, unhealthy, and elderly if you study the official statistics,” he’s said.

Kick back in the arms of Angourie's still-warm Country Soul.

The pretty little coastal hamlet of Angourie, separated from the burgeoning town of Yamba five clicks down Angourie Road there, is one of those rare joints that has so far resisted the siren call of development.

Curbless streets, rocks pools, everyone knows everyone, two world-class waves. If you’ve ever seen the 1971 surf classic Morning of the Earth, you’ll know the sequence of Baddy Treloar hacking the point to bits on a board he made in his backyard to the John J Francis song Simple Ben.

The birth of country soul. 

And, now, if you’ve got four-mill or thereabouts, you can get a piece of sweet little Angourie with 65 Pacific Street, the closest joint to the Point and overlooking Yuraygir National Park out the back. Land size is almost seven thousand square feet.

It’s a compelling sell,

The house itself is what sea change dreams are made of. 

A sophisticated and contemporary twist on the classic timber beach house, with some of the most spectacular ocean views you will find anywhere. 

This spacious one-bedroom, one-bathroom beach house includes an open plan living, dining, kitchen area with a covered veranda wrapping around three sides.

The materials, finishes and fixtures used in the home are of the highest quality and pay homage to the surrounding natural landscape. 

A dream for nature watchers, there is a huge range of birds in the surrounding bushland, families of kangaroos who often visit to feed on the grass close to the house and migrating whales which can be seen from the veranda.

Spectacular views of sunrises, moonrises and sunsets from the property are a highlight.

How much to retire to one of the last great surfer houses, which last traded in 1988 for sixty-five gees?

The joint next door sold for four-mill back in May (bought for $420k in 1998) so expect that as a minimum.

Contact the agent, the lovely Janis Perkins, if you got the cash, want to retire to heaven. 

Expressions of interest close February 14.

Tiramisu.

I am now in Milan’s airport waiting to exit this glorious country having just stood in front of Botticelli’s “The Birth of Venus” awed. The amount of art, of tiramisu and Negroni in Italy is positively stupefying. Potentially supernatural and possibly more supernatural than the recent viral sensation of a shark with a “mysterious” bite on its back.

The image, captured by photographer Jalil Najafov, self-described shark enthusiast, conservationist and filmmaker, in Mexico said it “changed his life.”

Najafov was born in Azerbaijan, a country I once visited and impressed by its use of the color yellow and also its lack of nightlife, has been studying and documenting sharks for decades though never saw something like the above.

What could cause such a scar?

Experts immediately ruled out a mating incident wherein sharks apparently love nibble each other and worry began to spread that it was maybe supernatural.

Aliens knowing if the ocean goes, we go, or more poetically stated by Najafov, “There is no ocean without sharks, and no oxygen without the ocean. So by saving sharks, we save the planet.”

His main concern is shark finning but have you ever tasted shark fin soup?

Nowhere near as tasty as tiramisu I’d gamble.

Yum.

Back to the scar, though.

Alien?

Ben Gravy?

Hmmm.