"The women need to escape the woke culture that permeates the WSL and apologizes for the women’s shortcomings in heavy waves."
Baseball-bat swinging, send-the-king-of-the-Hui to jail hell-raiser Ian “Kanga” Cairns has called on the WSL to gift Moana Jones Wong, and current world number one, a wildcard to compete in every event for the remainder of the Championship Tour season.
“She has singlehandedly put the WSL Women’s CT on her back and she’ll make Margaret River, Grajagan, Teahupoo and even Super Tubos electric,” says Cairns. “I suspect Moana will need to improve her backhand skills for Bell’s, Jeffreys, El Salvador and Rio but I can easily see her fine tuning a small-wave act for the Finals at Lowers after four event wins.”
If you know surfing, you’ll know the name Ian Cairns, a man with the physique of a comic-book hero who ruled big waves, who was pivotal in the creation of a world tour, who would launch the ASP after tearing the game off the IPS’s Fred Hemmings and whose thin-eyed stare could give a man stomach cramps.
Cairns, who is married to the former touring pro Alisa Schwarzstein, describes the emotion of watching the final.
“You want to be equal, then surf equal waves,” he says. “It was time for WSL to truly again celebrate women’s surfing by truly giving them the platform to showcase their skills in the ocean. Tyler’s 8.8 on a heavy Backdoor wave. Moana setting the bar at an unprecedented new level. Moana has the experience, the skills and the confidence to establish this new level. All women now have to raise up to that level.”
I ask, how important was today to women’s surfing?
“If you have Pipe, Sunset, Grajagan and Margaret River on the Women’s schedule, you’d better have a surfer with incredible skills in those waves and the experience to not be intimidated,” says Cairns. “Moana is the new WSL poster child for how great women’s surfing can be. There’s a lot of women with skills who will step up and challenge her but the key points are: Moana has made the WSL Women’s Tour in heavy waves credible and will lead a renaissance in women’s surfing away from dumb aerial bullshit to the realm where respect in surfing is earned…real waves.”
Is there a parallel between Moana and your lil gang of Bustin Down the Door mad cats?
“Change is scary. We forced change because we had no choice. No money, no education, just a desire to make surfing amazing and us along with it,” says Cairns. “To earn respect and to build a sport. That’s what Moana can catalyze in women’s surfing. Today’s waves have changed the game. Every young girl at BSR or Urbansurf now knows the pendulum has swung.”
Were you surprised they didn’t run the event yesterday or day before?
“I was pissed. I knew Moana had the skills as have many other girls, but more importantly the women need to escape the woke culture that permeates the WSL and apologizes for the women’s shortcomings in heavy waves. And now they stand up in front of the hyper-critical surf audience (like on Beachgrit comments) and say we’ve done it. I defy any of the internet trolls to go out at Pipe and do what those Women have done.”
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Fuck Ian. Everything would have happened without him. Can’t believe you’re giving him credit for inspiring an entire industry.
Shows how much he actually knows
Neil wasn’t really pissed at Rogan, he’s just mad that he only gets paid $0.0004 per streaming of his music.
Great performance from Moana, however the little we saw of her turn game seems below the top ladies. A big threat in hollow lefts though
I’m very curious to see how she does surfing backside at Sunset.
At Pipe she’s gonna be a menace for years to come, especially now that she is a Pipe Master. I’m thinking she’s gonna have a lot less problems getting waves out there now.
Wasn’t Cairns involved in some sexist Instagram beef with a female surfer recently? Suppose that’s why you asked him for comment.
Show’s how clueless the old fart is if he thinks WSL will give her a wildcard outside Hawaii. She is very good at a very specific way of surfing Pipe which while better than the other regular CT women, isn’t going to work elsewhere. Also there are loads of amazing local females in Tahiti, Indo, Portugal. Just imagine they could have a devout Muslim or Hindu win G Land if they wanted! In fact the idea of putting a pipe specialist in freezing onshore European beach breaks is hilarious. US/AU’s centric surf media still haven’t woken up to the reality of Portugal in March, it’s grim. Probably going to be the coldest CT event ever. Still Cairns is quite funny, maybe he’s just trolling.
100% i live in portugal and march still is very cold and it tends to be windy also i lived in hawaii for a number if years and used to surf v-land left a lot, i would see moana there quite a bit and never ever seen her going right i remember my local friend telling me that she was one of the only girls that really surfed pipe but did not know how to surf on her backhand and in fact he had never seen her ever going right by saying that i am not sure how she would do in other waves really but who knows maybe she got better at going right and doing turns and me in my ignorance don’t know that.
Yeah it’s grim out there. Surfing sucks don’t try it etc.
At least she doesn’t moana ‘bout it.
Moana, Moana, Moana…..let’s see her at Sunset. Hopefully she’s not a one trick pony.
Watching a young feminine woman have fun, smiling as she surfs the best waves of her life?
I’m in
Back to KS..has anybody here mentioned that if he retired at Pipe, history would not be able to record him as being the only 50 year old world #1?
his ego wouldn’t let him drop the mic
That too
Why is it we want woman to be tough courageous glorious arseholes anyway? They have been brave enough having babies and looking after them singlehandedly for millenia whilst men get all aggro and have a who’s gotta big dick warfest. Like to see Ian stay at home and look after the house and kids and then get called a lazy prick when his wife gets home and asks wheres dinner, let woman be woman, they are already hardcore enough,and better at working than most of us. Half the men had heart attacks when they started going to chopes
Good point over to both dick swingers bullies and the woke mob.
I guess some people would rather go surf than deal with an aggro baby crying non-stop while high on sleep deprivation, while failing to realize they were once the crying babies someone had to put up with. Talk about equal work / equal reward.
Nope, to be honest it’s been a long time that I don’t see the Mailman.
the results of this contest could not have been a better fit for the WSL narrative. like a drunk and blindfolded archer in a hurricane, they have still managed to hit the bulls eye. I can’t think of any other result being of more benefit to the WSL and you can be sure they will squeeze every last dropout of it. pipeline has been the golden goose for them and wins by kelly and Moana golden eggs,
who wants omelette?
Cairns is not playing with a full deck of cards.
First of all, Jones-Wong is fantastic. Period.
But Carissa Moore surfs at a higher level than any other woman in the world. Give her some legit time out at Pipe (the same amount of time as Moana has surfed out there, for example) and she will be winning there for many years to come. This statement from Kanga makes me think he is either drunk or hasn’t really watched women’s surfing at all since Carissa came on the scene.
If she surfed at a higher level than any other women in the world she would not have lost so badly to moana
Ok. On the flip side, if Moana surfs at a higher level at Pipe than any woman in the world and she paddles out in a heat against Carissa in 2-4 ft Trestles and can’t score above 3 pts per wave – does that confirm that she truly does not have a higher level of skillset at Pipe than the others?
Logic isn’t your strong point, is it?
Are we really all trolls ova here? Kinda just been saying what he said but with less… authority? Never make it personal, it’s just business.
Kanga is a fucking idiot.
The bar has been raised for the women – step up to the level of Moana in heavy waves or GTFO.
Moana needs a wild card until she qualifies.
I don’t know if going straight at her local warrants a wildcard to all events until she qualifies. Get on the qualifying grind girl! she can certainly afford it now. She’ll get one 100% for Sunset and I’m looking forward to seeing how she will go.
well thank god that applies only to the women pro surfers on the ct and not all surfers of all different ages and skill sets watching the contests and commentating online, cause that would be weird (looking at ian’s last sentence here) !
one more thing, can someone please explain this to dull, old me?
I get the inference, but what is preferable to being “woke”? Asleep? Ignorant? Opinionated? Deluded?
please, explain, someone. If “woke” is a dog whistle insult, what is the superior aesthetic opposite of “Aware”?
anyone?
“dumb aerial bullshit” pays the bills Ian
Ian Cairns and Peter Townend poisoned American surfing, now that I’m thinking about it, it may be a diabolical plot. Hell can not be hot enough for either. This joint was free as a bird and those two clucks brought homogenization, sterilization and outright poison to US surfing.
It was one of those sea changes that you look back and identify as poison.
Fucking lame ass vinyl red white and blue jumpsuit outfits, as gay as the Bronzed Aussie bullshit.
Contest ended yesterday as promised. Moana got a check, good on you girl! Only thing that could save that mess is the local charger wins.
Not sure the WSL could be so poorly produced.
Ian- “Change is great, I made big changes in surfing decades ago!”
Anyone- “Airs are a change from that style of surfing”
Ian- “Change is bullshit”
Like i said the propaganda is going to be laid on thick and fast , Kanga just kicked it off by bundling all the female pros under the MJW umbrella and implying the top female proffesional surfers have busted down the door , drawn a line in the sand , dude no they havent MJW has just sent them all back to the drawing board.
Ps plenty of non pro local cats surf the north shore everyday how do you know this audience is not part of that crew , you dont even fucken ride a surfboard so fuck off.