Breaking News: World’s greatest surf draw Kelly Slater drops out of El Salvador Pro hours ahead of contest start citing injury!

Heartbreak hotel.

There is fourteen-some hours, at time of writing, until the kickoff of the Surf City El Salvador Pro brought to you by Dirk Ziff and excitement hangs heavy in the banana-scented air. Many storylines to follow. For example, John John Florence and his tragic knee injury, Gabriel Medina’s return to tour, mid-way, in order to run the table and win at San Clemente, the world’s most decorated surfer, and its greatest draw, withdrawing citing injury.

Slater was last seen, here, celebrating World Ocean Day by spinning gorgeously at Uluwatu there on Bali otherwise known as the Isle of the Gods.

Ageless.

The north-of-fifty year-old professional looked ageless but, apparently, he somehow became hurt and has therefore withdrawn from Central America’s first championship tour event in… years?

Decades?

North of fifty years?

Difficult to say as it is difficult to pry true information from behind the World Surf League’s patented Wall of Positive Noise™. Did that thing ever get spackled right up in nearby G-Land or what?

The Apple TV smash Make or Break threatened to break the absurd rosy outlook but then 2 foot (3 German male lower leg) Grajagan got sold as “the best contest of the year” and boom.

Back.

Slater’s injury has yet to be announced but it may have to do with not wanting to go to El Salvador during rainy season.

Wet.

Will the 11x champ head to J-Bay, the next tour stop, in order to defend his current number 15 slot?

Currently more questions than answers.

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Mads Naeraa
Mads Naeraa
4 years ago

Maybe his feelings are hurt.

tim_nelsen
tim_nelsen
4 years ago

ceviche is mas bueno con sauza. no nessecito burritos.

need more sandbags!

Sell out
Sell out
4 years ago

Thats 2 on the mens side whose heats I like to watch. JJF and Slats. The remaining field now almost sounds like a world cup soccer team.
Forecast doesnt look flash, this part of the world has been really wet. Water is browner than blue. More plastic on the beach than sand. Someone mentioned a forecast injury and that would seem most likely for KS. I wonder what Tylers excuse is this time? We are going to get cold ovary monologues for years

tim_nelsen
tim_nelsen
4 years ago
Reply to  Sell out

that inclusive parade thang is stealing thunder and ending careers…a pot of gold under every rainbow?

notsurfingtoday
notsurfingtoday
4 years ago

Bit of a pressure cooker that place right now, mass arrests, crackdown on gangs, plus bitcoin as legal tender imposed by a Drake-lookalike millennial president. Can’t blame em for wanting to sit this one out. And it’s not like it’s a real job or anything.

samwaters
samwaters
4 years ago

Well, I’ve done a lot of below Ensenada trips and a solo trip to the tip, and then the ferry across to the Mainland.
Just got to say though, I think these dudes (don’t know about your buddies), who charge for surf trips and exploit these waves for $$ are ‘low-life’ bottom feeders, almost as low as surf camp owners who exploit waves for cash also.

MyGFsChinese
MyGFsChinese
4 years ago
Reply to  samwaters

I remember getting off that ferry in Mazatlan, I was sick as a dog from sleeping on the floor of that boat! Rough.

tim_nelsen
tim_nelsen
4 years ago
Reply to  MyGFsChinese

goats, chickens aren’t the best ferry guests…but that’s what I remember…drove a International Scout down from Tecate to Cabo before the road was paved…ferry to Topolobampo. from there went as far as San Blas/Matachen. but had a beach taco on Isla de Piedras (now Smith Island). while battling montezuma still surfed and camped for another couple of weeks. lost 10 pounds and raced back to MB. dysentary vanished. health restored. miracle!

but the highlight of this trip was paddling across the river from Mazatlan and surfing said isle. 4 hours at the at the peaks on the beach and another couple of hours at the jetty rights. on acid! stumbled onto the rocks to get back to camp and came across the perfectly rolled doobie. (it was here where the taco met the munchies met the ‘zuma.) miracle!

a year later in SB, I relayed this trip to my surfer/roomie. he had been in mex the same timeframe. he also surfed the isle jetty and had lost a doobie. miracle! (rolled one up another perfect ziggy and the legend continues to this day…

you all are welcome to share…doobies. legal now. miracle!

Dick Cram
Dick Cram
4 years ago

Slater out of the comp…. blaming injury. Pretty funny, I was watching a clip of him surfing Deserts yesterday that was filmed Friday and thinking he has a pretty decent flight ahead of him to be in el salvador by Sunday.
https://www.google.com/url?…

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
4 years ago
Reply to  Dick Cram

Gnarly sesh!

CHINATALIBAN-DUMP
CHINATALIBAN-DUMP
4 years ago
Reply to  Dick Cram

Hahaha! Injury must be coincident with the forecast!!!

Apeman
Apeman
4 years ago
Reply to  Dick Cram

Looks like the moron that dropped in caused the goat to fall awkwardly and tweak his ageing knee 🙁

sancho
sancho
4 years ago
Reply to  Dick Cram

damn he is shredding

Karl Von Fanningstadt
Karl Von Fanningstadt
4 years ago

Liquid and gas.

Tom
Tom
4 years ago

Most importantly what was Porta’s call on how to get the scores?
The Pink Panther for the win!!

samwaters
samwaters
4 years ago

Baja, been living on an island for a couple of decades–are all the beaches below Ensenada fenced off now like between Ensenada and the border.
What about the 7 sisters, still accessible? (please, no foul play on words, here, I know it’s tempting)
they were some breaks I used to frequent.

TJBurke
TJBurke
4 years ago

I was just there – it’s not rainy season. It’s wave season.

german_surfer_007
german_surfer_007
4 years ago
Reply to  TJBurke
Kwan
Kwan
4 years ago

Patented, trade marked ‘Wall of Positive Noise’? Does that work as well as that brilliant, supreme, white wash, that infamous good old boy Smellnet#, patented, trade marked* ‘Cone of Silence’?

#We know that you weren’t racist eddie, its a fact that it says more about that bloody committee than you.
*Still undergoing more rigorous testing on Indigenous Australians.

https://youtu.be/g1eUIK9CihA

Note young stewing savouring his beloved kretek, as benny savoured his last remnants of hair.

tim_nelsen
tim_nelsen
4 years ago
Reply to  Kwan

get smart is always pertinet…mel brooks’ & don adams’ shoe phone also.

J H
J H
4 years ago

He has an aversion to surfing in poop infested water.

J H
J H
4 years ago

Been to El Salvador once for work.

Ended up needing a course of cypro for my troubles.

Not a place I’d eagerly return so I get KS’ reluctance.

Sean Connery
Sean Connery
4 years ago
Reply to  J H

I would have done the same thing.

Low wide stinkbug stance
Low wide stinkbug stance
4 years ago

But my girlfriend is chinese was a good one!

Capt Sensible
Capt Sensible
4 years ago

Ps i got 10 bitcoin to wager that Gilmour takes away the nose candy award in sansalv.

Capt Sensible
Capt Sensible
4 years ago

Da fix is in setting up the final and getting cut surfers back on the CT , crock of shit the whole shootin match.

MyGFsChinese
MyGFsChinese
4 years ago

His replacement is Josh Burke from (BAR). What country is (BAR)? I haven’t heard of it.

Karl Von Fanningstadt
Karl Von Fanningstadt
4 years ago
Reply to  MyGFsChinese

Barbados?

MyGFsChinese
MyGFsChinese
4 years ago

That must be it!

Stick man
Stick man
4 years ago

Maybe he’s gonna go surf on the new Saudi funded tour …get $200 million just for showing up. No blood money, just want to share the love for surfing and help grow the sport.

Stephen Wolfram
Stephen Wolfram
4 years ago
Reply to  Stick man

Surfwashing I believe is what that would be if the wozzle wasn’t already that. Centro much cheaper and less crowds than dry season is my excuse. Lots o south energy but also power outages and not seeing the sun for a week.

Gino
Gino
4 years ago
Reply to  Stick man

We laugh, but all it would take is one little son of a sheik who is into surfing.
My lovely ex wife worked at the 4 Seasons and we got to stay in London for free next to Hyde Park.
The sheiks take up whole floors and live there. Actually saw a real harem file out into a few limo type cars. Next to the hotel there a showroom with 1 McLaren sitting there to be snapped up on a whim.

tim_nelsen
tim_nelsen
4 years ago
Reply to  Gino

The Sheik: “sorry ’bout the ex…but it was a fair exchange at the time…many goats you received? yes””

tim_nelsen
tim_nelsen
4 years ago
Reply to  Stick man

surf or golf?

Stick man
Stick man
4 years ago
Reply to  tim_nelsen

Golf or die!

janeausten
janeausten
4 years ago
Reply to  Stick man

I wondered how he was going to get from Deserts to El Salvador in 2 days….

Barrelled
Barrelled
4 years ago

Maybe he can crack the lip again at Ulu’s right hander. Can someone show me where the hell that is?

Sean Connery
Sean Connery
4 years ago
Reply to  Barrelled

Maybe a sneaky right between the peak and temples on high tide?

notsurfingtoday
notsurfingtoday
4 years ago
Reply to  Barrelled

Wasn’t it him that conjured a small-ish righthand barrel during a heat at teahupoo some time ago?

janeausten
janeausten
4 years ago

Bruce, I think.

Ricky Spanish
Ricky Spanish
4 years ago

Another bad forecast injury, shocking

Stick man
Stick man
4 years ago
Reply to  Ricky Spanish

MS13 holmes…

Ricky Spanish
Ricky Spanish
4 years ago
Reply to  Stick man

Is that the foot bone he broke forever ago?

tim_nelsen
tim_nelsen
4 years ago
Reply to  Ricky Spanish

cutting off his own limb for broth, despite the warnings from his witch doctors & friends.


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