“You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.”
A few days before Christmas, the shaggy haired boy who enchanted the world in Vogue fashion spreads and as the first tweenie to ride Pipeline married his long-time girlfriend, the Australian Lauryn Cribb.
The thirty year old Florence proposed to his long-time girlfriend, a model turned horticulture student, in 2019 using a diamond ring his mama Alex had found on the beach and right before a one-month yacht voyage.
“It was a blazing hot day, he was so nervous that he didn’t want to go in the water even though we were both sweating profusely,” Cribb, now Florence, told Vogue in an interview that forms a lavish spread of the wedding, including wild after-party photos. “He had a knee injury, so you can imagine I didn’t get the cookie cutter dropped knee proposal. Laying down on the hot beach at midday, he made me “look over there” as he grabbed the ring his mother had given him as a placeholder.”
The pair were married in the nearby Waimea Valley although torrential rains, the same storms that created an epic river wave that nearly slaughtered sad-eyed degenerate Jamie O’Brien, almost forced a switcharoo of locations.
“The Waimea River actually flooded the venue the day before, which, despite our concerns and the outcome the day of, is considered good fortune when the river is flowing,” said Cribb. “We were very lucky it subsided and the grounds were not at all muddy or wet.”
In the photo spread, which you can examine here, we find the couple and their myriad friends dancing the night away under a grand marquee festooned with lights, the happy couple hoisted upon guest’s shoulders, forming a miracle of love against the heavens.
“You know you’re in love,” said ol’ Dr Seuss, “when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.”
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Oh shit! Didn’t know you were Crab Dreams! How’s Town treating you and the missus?
Furry freak bros was the only comic i could relate to
shhh… VNR is revealing his gallery show.
Thanks for all the dahui goss.
Youre on fire like a wet match
Massive illegal shark cull in Western Australia in honour of Lisa.
https://www.smh.com.au/nati…
Better than them yellow-bellied bastards at the O.K. Corral who are not fit to shoot when you want to unload and clean yer gun.
How you been LGR?
Spent my time away building a monitor barn on my Montana property. After finishing it was deer season and put the brand new meat processing room in the barn to good use. Went up to Alaska to visit my son, then back to Montana for Christmas with my sister and brother-in-law.
Is it like thr Dutton ranch?
Even better cause no Hollywood types would dare stray so far from a Starbucks. A little under 160 acres. Healthy white tail and elk populations in the region.
Best part is just how freakin’ quiet it is.
Fyi that ain’t Baldy. He’s been gone longer than you.
When can I purchase that ensemble from Flo Mar X? Is that a JJF Wetsuit Jacket?
Careful with what you wish
https://www.designboom.com/…
Yeah, got that one already
The beard barber should be in for a big tip after making JJs facial hair look just about presentable.
Here’s the photo of Billy Kemper (after he had one too many, and got pantsed by Ivan and their old man) that Vogue neglected to put in it’s photo spread.
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Looks like he’s taken the blow-up vest idea to the trouser department…
ur u cruel ella?
Carrot McNamara
brilliant
Hope she’s no Yoko
His divorce is gonna be epic.
….the one from the WSL.
And will end exchanging bro-jobs with Tom Brady, if Gabby’s escapades have taught us anything
“You know you’re in love,” said ol’ Dr Seuss, “when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.”
Oh yeah, no doubt Otto… be it the bride or the bafoonery of the WSL, this quote to end another genius literary piece here on BG, applies to JJF’s future… just flip the “better than your dreams” to “painfully, brutally, soul-erasing worst than your dreams”…
Aussie grunta
lol did John get married in hiking boots?
I’ve got a whole book of used wedding photos if anyone’s interested. Would swap for a set of fins [FCSII, medium Merricks would be nice].
Good luck finding them washed up on the beach after you forget to screw them, the fins I mean.
I can’t fall asleep because it’s 11am and my mum’s dream is for me to finally move out but she doesn’t know how hard it is to be 49 and living with your mum because she had the luxury of a life of meaning as she raised her younger siblings after her parents were lost in the war and then me and my 8 siblings
love you mum
wait til she turns 96
She sounds super selfish