Shocking with facts!
Before long all of us will be old men and women, stinking horribly, spitting into handkerchiefs and muttering the occasional despairing shriek as we await our maker to reveal his golden stairway to heaven.
Therefore it behooves us to treat our bodies as the fragile temple it is, to enjoy, fully, what we have and before we retreat into the terrible darkness.
Kelly Slater, who is fifty-one but whose physical appearance suggests a man twenty years younger, has revealed the diet secrets gleaned from a lifetime of reading and travelling and performing at the pinnacle of a demanding sport.
In an interview with the WSL’s body mechanic Jason Gilbert, who is also in his fifties, Slater talks of sugar spikes, food combining, food crashing, his four-day water fasts, how to die with grace, Shane Dorian’s weight consciousness and his constant fiddling with the fat protuberances around his waist and how his girlfriend, the Chinese-American bikini mogul Kalani Miller cured herself of auto-immune disease by paying close attention to what she eats.
“She learned enough to heal herself through the people we’ve met around the world,” says Slater.
In the immortal words of my mentor Hunter S Thompson: “Buy the ticket, take the ride”
So I will indeed fly close to the sun as it is better to burn out than to fade away
Has it been confirmed that the sport has actually “exploded in growth”? The F1 for example has exploded in growth. People quite often are talking about F1 and how it has grown significantly in the last few years. You never hear randoms at work who aren’t into surfing for example talking about the WSL. Me personally have watched less and less comps over the last 18 months purely because they are dull and uninteresting. Overall on a heat by heat basis they are held in below average waves for what that location can produce. Seems the management of the company has been shithouse.
I don’t mind him in the booth, much better than the clown show doing it now
Name two CUNTS that would not allow competitors to celebrate Bethany Hamilton on International Women’s Day. FUCK THE WSL. None of the WOKE PUSSY COWARD commentators dare mention a word of it. Competitors who chose Bethany found their freedom to choose cancelled and another woman not of their choosing substituted. Can’t say it enough FUCK THE CUNTS RUNNING THE WOKE WSL.
did jason offer kelly the rose in the bottle I wonder ,,,,
Cant believe Chas not piling on Elo and JMD as they purposely stay out of office for well deserved hotel exploits.
Or those barns who rock all 5 fins
Every 50 something year old gets a sore back Kelly!
It’s not an uninteresting interview, but ffs I wish he’d let someone else finish a sentence for once.
Turn that thruster around backwards for the ultimate five fin setup
Enough of the Kelly Slater articles, can have an article on the troubled life of Ronnie G and what led him to the HB shootout?
Never Forget!
I haven’t. RIP G.
IF only Ronnie G had left his gun and those tall white socks back in Santa Ana that day. RIP brotha!
Agreed on the microdosing but not the other enhancers. I’m 59 with heart plaque of a 20 yr old, a resting rate between 49-52, blood pressure 129-79 and the bacon and eggs were awesome this morning. As for the big night of tequila and beer last night…Advil cures all!
Coffee, water, beer, repeat …
Ask JBG what his SECRET IS…
Mike Ho is still getting bombs at Pipe.
We have at least a another 20 years of Kelly in the lineup at Ehukai.
no more ks; no more trans; no more real estate; no more bitchin…no more blues! https://scontent-sjc3-1.xx….
Kelly Slater, who is fifty-one but whose physical appearance (except for being bald) suggests a man twenty years younger.
There, fixed it for you
Another piece on Kelly Slater?—I can see I have ‘not’ missed much— after being ‘banned’, ‘again’…
I, for one, missed you, Sam.
Fuck, I didn’t
Why were you banned Sam?
It’s like watching Tom cruise jumping up añ down on Oprah s couch all over again
Kelly’s melting down
Tom Cruise is a deeply closeted gay man whose career is managed by a guy who made his disappear and a fictional alien.
Kelly likes to surf.
THIS!!!
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Drunk feasting is one of the more pleasant things NonJohn has ever experienced. It’s better than a 1.25 second barrel.
wanna see my boat?
Was that you in the Amphawa floating market in Thailand serving Pad Thai?
It was delicious!
ono!