Capitalism: Walmart signs Tony Hawk!

Which surfers would do best in a big box discount retailer?

Tony Hawk, the older skateboarder who became famous by stealing skate moves from Australians, just inked a historic deal with Arkansas superstore Walmart!

Walmarts are known, the world over, as places that offer ridiculously cheap prices on consumer goods. They are also known, the world over, as places that do not smell very good. They are also known, the world over, as places not to work. Human Rights Watch says:

“Walmart denies basic human rights to its employees.”

Tony Hawk says:

“In my many visits to Canada on skate tours, I am consistently humbled by the response that Canadians have given to me, the Tony Hawk brand and skateboarding in general. I will be fully committed to the success of this launch through my social media, marketing, and appearances. It’s going to be a great ride!”

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But it makes me wonder, which surfer (outside Laird and Kelly) would have the strongest big box superstore middle America appeal? If, say, Taj Burrow launched a line of Taj by Taj boardshorts would they do well? If Gabriel Medina released a series of Gab by Gab rashguards would you see them dotting the Great Lakes next summer? If Mick Fanning licensed an “I fought the shark and I won” t-shirt would it sell?

Which surfer (outside Laird and Kelly) is crazy marketable?