Who's gonna miss it, right?
Two days ago, I engaged the creator of #TourNotes, Peter
King, in discussion of the tumultuous 2015 WSL season. As
a former professional surfer with an unmatched overview of the
game, he gave a rousing and through account of the season.
In a nutshell, Filipe, best in the world, judging, prone to
costly mistakes, Gabriel, big legs.
What I didn’t include in the interview, which was already a
little long (who’s got the time to scroll down half a dozen
pages!), was PK’s recipe for a better tour.
And let’s put this in a nutshell, too. Kill the WQS, says
PK.
Shall we examine?
BeachGrit: I’m always surprised by the unwieldiness of
the tour. Thirty-something guys, plus gals at a few events, two
sets of loser rounds, two-week waiting periods. Test cricket is
fast-paced compared to pro surfing. I believe numbers should be
slashed. You?
PK: There shouldn’t be a QS. There should be one event. Everyone
comes and surfs the event. I’ll explain. Snapper. You have the top
16, or whatever, and the rest go up on the Sunshine Coast for ten
days to decide who goes against the top 16. Get rid of the of the
WQS and that gets 12 million dollars back in the kitty. Obviously,
you’re not going to have 108 guys at Cloudbreak, but there other
spots in Fiji to decide the surfers. No more one stars, two stars,
three stars, six stars, ten stars, no more Primes. Everyone comes
to the 12 events, once a month. One hundred and sixty guys descend
on a town for two weeks. So, for Trestles, they surf Oceanside for
ten days. This used to be called the QS. Every heat win is worth
250 bucks so it’s worth it for everyone. Go have an event, get your
16 guys and they come up to Trestles for the main event. The whole
tour is in California for a month, it’s great for rent-a-cars, it’s
great for hotels. At the moment, it’s a painful system.
BeachGrit: I’m such a fan, oh such a fan, but those
first two days of an event, no matter how deftly called, are
drudgery.
PK: Less is more. You don’t have to broadcast until 16 guys are
left surfing. You have two days of action. Best two days and we’re
on. We got great talent and we got two days. An event that lasts
longer than an international cricket match, well, you can’t keep
everyone’s attention. It’s a tough show.
You know what all the guys say about the QS? They love it that
they know…exactly… when their heat is on. My heat is
happening at 11am on Thursday. It’s like a boardriders club
contest. You know it’s happening and that’s that. If you’re in crap
conditions, it’s crap for everyone.
BeachGrit: Worse are events in opposite
hemispheres when events go on and off standby. It’s hard
to wake up at two am for the possibility an event might run, and
then only two or three heats.
PK: They struggle with that in France. It’s not easy to go down
the beach in France, it’s called off, walking over the sand dunes,
back to the hotel, come back, find parking, walk over the sand
dunes. It’s a hassle. France is the hardest place. You need the
right tide, the right bank. There’s some tough decisions. The
moment they say it’s on, a bank pops up that’s better. Europe is
brutal. You know what all the guys say about the QS? They love it
that they know…exactly… when their heat is on. My heat is
happening at 11am on Thursday. It’s like a boardriders club
contest. You know it’s happening and that’s that. If you’re in crap
conditions, it’s crap for everyone.
BeachGrit: It’s always hard to watch the two best
surfers in the contest have a final in deteriorating waves, which
often happens.
PK: You want to finish strong. It’d take two days to finish a
premiere event in my new format. Two days. Great, we’re going today
and tomorrow. It’s tough to pick good conditions for three or four
days.
BeachGrit: You see it when the girls have stand-alone
events. It’s wrapped in a day and a half.
Ronnie Blakey is my favourite. His fake Australian accent is
amazing. It’s, like, I don’t believe the news if it’s coming from
an American. It has to be read by an English person. With surfing
analysis, it has to be an Australian voice. Let’s put it back in
the hands of people that know.
PK: The girls’ tour is a lot easier to run. There’s so few of
‘em. You know what else I’m thinking? There should be a qualifying
series for announcers. I’d sure like to see Barton Lynch qualify
for the announcing booth and hear some real analysis. Did Sean-o
(Doherty) lose favour along the way? I don’t know how you can’t
have those voices explaining what’s going on.
BeachGrit: Tell me how you feel about Joe Turpel. I
can’t imagine pro surfing without his distinctive, just below
falsetto.
PK: I’ve done broadcasting before and a guy like Joe is
invaluable to a webcast. If you’re a producer in the booth, you
need someone who tells the audience where you are and what’s been
happening. He’s so good at directing the traffic. Joe’s perfect,
he’s the voice of surfing. But without calling anyone out, Ronnie
Blakey is my favourite. His fake Australian accent is amazing.
It’s, like, I don’t believe the news if it’s coming from an
American. It has to be read by an English person. With surfing
analysis, it has to be an Australian voice. Let’s put it back in
the hands of people that know.
BeachGrit: Do you enjoy Pottz’s international
accent?
PK: I just like him. When he was at the top of his game he
signed a picture for me that read: Remember, nothing is
impottzable. I never forgot it. He’s a world champion. If
you’re not a world champ or an Australian, get off the stage.
BeachGrit: You want to ice the WQS, and this I hear, but
what do you think the WSL got very right this year?
PK: The best thing they did was get everybody talking about
surfing again. Every surf blog in the world, every surf website in
the world, analyses every nuance of the WSL. All they need is us
talking about it, and we’re talking.
