Taj Burrow, Jack Freestone and pals' coconut water co will make you millions!
Remember St. Archer? The extreme sport craft beer financed by action sport stars that took the world by storm, eventually selling to MillerCoors for multiple tens of millions of dollars?
I remember when I first heard the concept that I almost spit vodka out my nose. “Another craft beer in San Diego?” I chortled. “Ha!” The market here, for those who don’t know, is gagged with a bazillion tons of hops and barley and mostly hops since IPA is trending hard. And distribution is controlled by very few. How would a dang extreme sport craft beer even begin to compete. “HA!”
Boy, was I wrong.
And now the same team is entering another choked market. Coconut water! That’s right, you’ve seen Laura Enever’s post, the word VILLAGER in black on a simple white background. You’ve maybe even followed @villagergoods and seen that same logo tiled across the page.
But what is?
Extreme sport Coconut water as financed by action sport stars! I’m sure there is some sort of ecological/giving-back angle. I’m sure it will have electrolytes. I’m sure it will taste good and be branded well. I’m sure they will steal market share and be scooped up.
Investors include Jack Freestone and Taj Burrow, Taylor Knox, Pat, Dane and Tanner Gudauskas, Laura Enever, and best skateboarder in the world Paul Rodriguez.
I’m sure, this time, that everyone will make multiple tens of millions of dollars.
Can you think of an ultra-crowded market that BeachGrit can jump in? A fast food chain that sells hamburgers and french fries? A bread company where the product comes to your grocery shelf tucked in a clear plastic bag? Cold-pressed juices? Coffee?
Help us help you!
how about a dating app for degenerates who comment on stab? You can call it Derelicte!
Poke. this shit gunna be the next sashimi. its on every fuckers lips.
wanna fund me a Poke shop on Campbell road in Bondi?
long as its not that Jap nuke tuna shit, we are a go.
Maybe a group of professional surfers could gather and create some sort of social service that we could buy into, that would improve an impoverished community or help combat homelessness or end domestic violence…or just more consumer goods.
True. For every coffee and juice bar in Silverlake there is a Poke place now.
Headlined by B-listers with a .0125 QS win percentage and the winners of European national titles.
@anthonymarcotti:disqus are you Brad Gerlach girlfriend?
Coconut Water??? Shit man why?
How about those little nicotine bags the Swedes slip between lip and gum. Those things are great. Snus. “With Rielly Snus, you really can’t lose.”
To digress a bit from yet another extreme-sport-backed drink company, can one of you beautifully eloquent Beachgrit writers please highlight and explain the freudian sexual motives underneath surfline’s recent video posting titled, “slater stands and delivers at giant backdoor”. I understand from previous posts that you guys are specialists at these kind of diagnoses and since surfline filters their comments, I would love an explanation.
Sincerely,
Banana
Not even kidding here… Milk Shop. Personally I hate the shit unless it’s mixed with Life cereal.
That said, just like those stupid expensive custom juice shops where a bottle of fresh squeezed OJ will run you 8 smackers.
Eco friendly bring your own 50’s style milk man bottle back type place. The Brooklyn kids will love it, milk beards and over sized button downs all day.
(Disclaimer: Its Friday, I’ve been drinking)
When is your book coming out, it looks interesting!
how about a bubbly organic hydration drink and call it BURPS …you could even give it a purple tinge ……
hey antman, coupla things…
1. your whole first paragraph is entirely valid, except for how fucking seriously you took my comment, which was simply using Brad G as a prop to poke fun at Chas/BG. Brad is a legend, without a doubt, but this is the internet, so relax.
2. I am one of very few people in the world of surf message boards who uses his real name, so despite the fact that I am using a keyboard to convey my messages, you can hardly make the argument that I’m hiding behind it.
3. midlife. crisis.
https://www.youtube.com/wat…
I use my real name, and I am a biiiit of a big deal Mike.
and you can Banks on that Anthony…..see you in 10 days!
Hi Mr. Gerlach! Welcome to Beachgrit!
man-crush alert, code red
There is a gap in the market for cold dripped energy vodka.
I’ve experimented with electrolyte powder in vodka. Needless to say, it needs some work, but I’m confident my team of scientists can work it out.
Despite the fallacy of, “my favorite surfer drinks it, so it must be good,” I’d rather see surfers promoting coconut water than sugary, cancer-fueling energy drinks. Actually, I’d rather see Laura Enever promote just about anything…
But mon dieu, Chaz! An overcrowded market ripe for surfing cross-promotion in California? Weed, my friend! It’s pseudo-but-inevitably-soon-to-be-completely legal status is just screaming for a slightly rebellious spokesman to come in and tell the masses it will make your longboarding more stylish, and your shortboarding, well, probably worse. You could be in the pole position if you get in now!
What Youth will surely help you write promotional captions for your new brand’s Insta.
you guys could start an internet blog that accepts ad money from Brad Gerlach’s midlife crisis business venture
I, very honestly, laughed til tears.
I have an idea Chas , vodka and coconut juice frozen in the form of a dildo and can then be used as a very joyful enema and get pissed at the same time !!!