Gets busted for superimposing face over departed legend (again)!
We’ve said it before, so many times, and I’ll say it again right now. Kelly Slater is so much fun on social media! He has no handler, for one, no person moonlighting as “Kelly Slater” doing his Instagrams etc.
He is opinionated, for two, spouting his genuinely held ideas into the most shallow of pools.
He loves to engage all manner of hater and troll and fanboy, for third, penning serious responses to half baked splatter.
He’s weird, for last.
Like, way weird!
Today, or maybe yesterday, he wondered out loud which two people you would base a belief system upon. Let’s read his exact phrasing.
Amen, #Spock… Ahead of our time. If you were to create a belief system for people to follow, which two people would it be based on? Mine would be Spock and #BruceLee. I think that’s a good blend of philosophy between pacifism and martial arts. #VulcanDeathGrip
It struck me, initially, because why two? Why not just one? All belief systems are, of course, a melange but why did Kelly want a combo of specifically two people?
Then it struck me because Spock was a fictional character and Bruce Lee was real. Strange? Like basing a belief system on the living ideals Superman and Ralph Nader? Or Wolverine and Don Johnston? Or Casper the Friendly Ghost and RuPaul? Or Scooby-Doo and F. Scott Fitzgerald?
Or L. Ron Hubbard and ummm L. Ron Hubbard?
Odd.
And finally he super-imposed his own face on that of Spock’s, covering Leonard Nimoy’s mug. This is the second time in as many months that Kelly Slater has placed his face over a dead man’s.
What is he telling us?
Also, If you were to create a belief system for people to follow, which two people would it be based on?
ok, well tell me what did slater have for breakfast this morning, since you report on every god dam social media post he does.. come on fuckhead, think of something other than this shit. i think kelly is a douche too, but there is only so much spotlight you could give this guy, its ad-nasuem at this point. why dont you interview some of the brazilian storms girlfriends. at least i will like the fucking article if you post them in a thong or show some tits, that it chas, show more tits
Congratulations Blah! you’ve managed to post a comment without using Faggot or fag in it. I’ve been quitely deleting a few of your comments lately in the hope you’ll lift your commentary game…
you deleted my comment coz i said fag? what a fag..
But what if I am? Who cares? you’re on the wrong side of history my friend. It’s not just your constant use of the word faggot, its how you use it.
Got no problem with people here acting like schoolboys… but just don’t want the commentary dumbed down.
is it safe to say the f word or god dammit?
are you a mod on stab too? they have been deleting a lot of my comments
Im not, But that is probably saying quite a lot about the tone of your commentary…
ill tone it down, just for you, and just so i can accumulate upvotes to fulfill the black void which is my life
Cheers Blah! I understand the great stress release an angry comment can give, but trust me it’s a never ending rabbit hole of hate.
Fast Eddie and Donald Trump.. Imagine!
the Crying Michael Jordan meme & Wilkos Dad
i forgot to mention why Wilkos Dad. He one told me Jesse Miley Dyers mum was a cunt in the Winkipop car park – thats the only words he has ever spoken to me.
Noa Deane and Spicoli.
is it imaginary wealth?
Bobby Martinez and Johnny Tsunami
I met a Johnny Tsunami; he offered an off-duty law enforcement official a hit from a doobie; small guy, curly hair, talker.
He gave his number to a girl that I went to high school with. Prank calling became a hobby for half my class. Yeeeeesh Pono!
The same Johnny Tsunami from Hawaii?
Looks like Trump has gone for Hitler and the Chinese guy who came up with the idea for the Great Wall.
Kelly is highly intelligent……for a surfer. His inflated idea of his own intelligence shouldn’t really come as a surprise though. A product of being surrounded by the surfing world full of sycophantic morons your whole life.
ah but is it a subtle marketing ploy? His top selling model the , “Sci Fi,” , his new model to come , the Martial Lee?
“With great power comes great responsibility , of keeping it real ! “Spiderman and Ali G…..now there’s something you can truly believe in!
Oh I was more focused on the quote in the picture than his caption. It’s kinda been bugging me for a little while so here I am on the internet as an anon having a rant. Basically, he claims to be an environmentalist but is often advocating all types of pseudo-science, conspiracy theories and straight up quackery. That kind of thinking just helps millions of people around the world think Rhino horns are powerfully medicinal, climate change is a lie and that vaccines cause autism. When you deny science in favour of whatever pseudo-science you pick to support your stance on a particular issue (eg his stance on GMO, organic etc), you do more harm than good in the long term. People are even more inclined to deny real science. Real science with the potential to help save the planet. Surfers are the most deluded group of people in the world when it comes to their sense of importance and Kelly seems to be no different. He has a big audience and has made progress but I’m bummed out that he is still getting it so wrong.
yeah there is a lot of delusion /marketing in surfing right now , I have saying about Wanker wisdom , now Wonka Wisdom , the USA is bit conservative, one of my real gripes with Kelly , is he owns one of the biggest surf companies in the world , Firewire , which has their boards on consignment in Australia and USA , this has had one of the most destructive influences on surfboard manufacturing and sales , and unethical at the same time too.
In the next coming months we will see carnage in the market here , with sales in retail stores down 30-50% in bds and clothing , but only the surf industry had had these falls….bubble has popped , we will now see team riders ,workere lose their jobs like never before , greed is great?
Your wisdom speaks volumes..Yes Rory that was an ass kiss, but its fucking true.. Mark Richards and Bob Mcknight cruising together for PR purposes. Love to talk/hear story with MR, but i think Bob’s ego won’t let him walk away from the business without taking more.
actually Bob is a really good guy , MR , trying to help quiky , which I think is bound for the super markets , as well as a couple of other brands, I have never seen this in my 45 years in the industry…fuck I’m old!!
Bob McKnight is an egomaniacal corporate hack who has destroyed an iconic brand. get out more greedy Muppets like this haven’t changed in 800 years of modern capitalism. Always the same. History doesn’t repeat but it often rhymes
Agreed most people in surfing world are morons. However the surfboard industry is stuck in the dark ages. And scale is a big part of the problem so is antiquated technology and materials. I would also argue globally we are on the cusp of a clean energy and 3d manufacturing revolution that will create prosumers of all kinds. And threaten the entire corporate fascist fake democracy that has been created. Overlay the blockchain and Pablo from the backstreets of Columbia could design a better surfboard than Kelly or you Maurice. I think it’s exciting times. It is not the strongest or smartest of the species that survives but those most capable of adaptation. Charles Darwin
delusion/marketing only works on newbies that are going to buy a sci-fi or a krypto from a shop, or a 7S that’s a price-point decision. shit, even these Wavestorm guys will want a custom board eventually.
not like shapers aren’t all retailers too. once i’ve got a direct number, no shop is ever seeing a dime for hardgoods purchases, same with rubber. they’ve got about 3 years to make as much money off a newbie as they’re ever going to make.
consignment sucks but companies with access to capital will always use it against those that don’t. just have to hope they take those dollars somewhere they can get a better return or that shit is here to stay, unfortunately.
Theodore Kaczynski and John Wayne Gacy.
Caligula and Calvin (from Calvin and Hobbes).
Except most “normal” personalities have handers for that sort of thing. Kelly breaks from the pack!
Mason Ho’s and Yuval Noah Harari’s.