John John Florence's antics ain't cool, bro. Ain't cool at all.
And look at John John Florence going and being all good at everything. Oh there he is making the most visually impressive surf film ever. And look, over there, he’s winning the Eddie in biggest/best Waimea ever. Beating men who dedicate themselves only to the giant wave. But wait, now he is winning the entire World Surf League tour, smashing the field so thoroughly in all sizes of wave that he doesn’t even need the last event even though it basically breaks in his living room and he is going to win it too and the Triple Crown and Taylor Swift’s delicate hand.
Such a phenomenon! Such a… millennial!
And don’t those damned overachievers just roil you? Doesn’t their good-at-everything always-try-super-hard deal just rub you the wrong way? Yeah, your cool like me.
We’re Generation X, bro.
It’s all so lame. Everything is so lame. Trying is so lame. Everything is super lame.
At least we’ll always have Dane Reynolds. He, like me, like us, understands the lame. Remember when he quit the World Tour? When he gots lots o money and then quit Quiksilver? When he quit basically surfing all together?
Cool like jazz and this whole thing may read ironic but it’s not. I’m serious. Like every Gen Xer though everything I write or say comes out vaguely ironic. Trying is lame.
Whatever.
Donald Trump ain’t my president and John John Florence ain’t my champion.
All hail Dane Reynolds, or whatever. Our slacker king n shit.
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surfed emma wood yesterday…saw dane…he still shredzz don’t you worry chas
Although I do have a man crush on john john and love his wispy chin hair… this may be the greatest article Chas has ever written. Thank you.
is dane the kurt cobain and john john the eddie vedder of surfing?
jj more chris martin-ish.
Dane is Morrissey, jj is Bono
Slater is definitely Bono! Clearly forgotten that he’s actually just another surfer and not the messiah sent to save the world from chemtrails and evil men in suits. Only thing missing is the shit sunglasses!
…and Mick Fanning is any of the members of Toto.
Man, that was cruel!
Kind of, but all of the Toto members were the best session musicians of their era, technically perfect if not necessarily the most creative. They could play anything at any time in any studio for any producer, trustworthy, reliable and flawless. And though I hated it at the time, “Africa” is pretty cool. https://www.youtube.com/wat…
It seems Dane has many some things in common with Miki Dora–doesn’t like crowds–doesn’t like competition—-doesn’t believe it proves anything, he doesn’t really like big waves. Maybe he’s a modern day–Da Cat….
duh
The first is questionable, the second is false. He’s Gen Y.
Dane proved to be a false prophet, but that’s alright! JJF answered everybody’s* prayers!
* Not Brazilian
It’s cool to make fun of him, but I’m gonna buy the fuck out of their new brand. Austyn Gillette is excellent and so is that new WKND clip.
How come y’all didn’t tell us that Dylan Reider died. I had to find out from fuckin Stab.
beach, not street, grit.
One love.
I’m going to go out on a limb and agree that you fully understand “the lame”.
And just going…sailing…and being good at photography. Fuck that!
Everyone can be good at photography. Buy a decent camera. Read photography for dummies. Go shoot photos get better everyday. Monetizing it into a job is something else and the true art.
hell yea surf or die
You democrats haven’t been this pissed since we freed your slaves. Suck it! Maga!
I ain’t a Dem and I ain’t pissed. I just don’t care, bro.
i think he meant to spell “Demo-Graph” Chas,,,,,, just saying 😉
Dane Reynolds: The Gen Xer trapped in a Millennial’s body.