The world is your oyster!
Wow how rude was I yesterday? So Grinchy! So grouchy! So totally depressive! That is NOT the BeachGrit way at all! Rory Parker was a national treasure and we’ll miss him every day of the week but while we’re missing him should one of us maybe qualify for the World Championship Dream Tour?
Now that thought gives me wiiiings!
I read a piece this morning by Ben Mondy, who is very very funny, on Grind, which still magically exists, about Portugal’s Fred Morais.
This particular piece is not funny. It details the rigors of the 49 event qualifying series and how “difficult” it is etc. etc. etc.
“The ‘QS is so damn hard and can take a toll on your confidence,” Morais is quoted as saying. “You just have to keep plugging away and competing the right way. In the end, if you are good enough, you’ll get there.”
But I was thinking… what if you or I just entered every single QS contest, flying non-stop from Huntington to Maroubra to Israel to Hawaii to Queensland then we can stay in Australia for six contest, to French Polynesia to Florida to Tahiti to Argentina to Basque country to Martinique to Indonesia to Brazil to Indonesia to Bali to South Africa to Japan to South Africa to Hawaii to South Africa to Spain to Japan to Mexico to Chile to Japan to Portugal to Huntington to Cornwall to France to Virginia Beach to France to Spain to North Carolina to Portugal to Morocco to the Philippines to Cascais to Costa Rica to Japan to Hawaii to Brazil to Taiwan to Hawaii?
Oh our travels alone would lead to a global warming extinction event but…. for sure we would qualify right? Maybe not year one but probably year two. It is a joy of professional surfing that heats are not won by the best surfer. There are just so many variables from the ocean going flat to the judges being gently encouraged to screaming in the ear of a young 15 year old that he is not good enough.
And then you or I would be in the Big Dance!
Doesn’t that give you wiiings?
Should we try?
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I entered a pretty big QS in Oz once on a whim. Round of 164 or something. I beat a local 13 year old, but that was it.
I kid you not…that looked like my flying schedule from 2016. And 2017 ain’t shaping up to be any better.
Are you a pilot?
No but I work in the airline/aviation business. I used to joke with a pilot friend of mine that I flew as many block hours a month as he did and also had a job. He didn’t appreciate the humor.
1) have very rich parents who can own large homes so you can take solitary dumps, and dominate.
Leonardo Favoronti
I’d address both of you, those were the exact people I was thinking of, seriously though I’m sure Connor has a nice dump looking at backdoor spit while some Brazilian Volcom team guy has to take a shit on the bike path because the other toilets are full of Kaiborg dumps. Who do you think is going to surf the heat better?
I wish my parents bought a house looking out at pipe then gave it to my sponsor. Put me in coach!!!
Didn’t volcom drop Parker regardless?
Yea but their parents let Hurley run loose. If I was Parker I would be trying to get the top floor. Money talks though. Sorry son, you just might have to get the closest to it.
If you come to NC you can stay at my place. I run the live stream too. I can totally make sure you get the proper screen time for maximum sponsor exposure.
Is this true? Could you push me through a few heats with just the right angles of my skillz?
I cant push you through the good ol boy judging panel. Thats done by handshakes and recognition. Angles and screen time though… hope your great at surfing waist high onshore slop!
You really going to let his arrogant apology slide? I expect more from a human that drop knees.
Nothing about this apology even crossed my mind honestly. Like i said before im gonna watch that play out. I offer my home to anyone that travels through for surf though. I dont believe in blacklisting people unless they do something seriously fucked up. Chas and Rorys beef is between them and pretty piddly in all honesty. Two writers upset at each other over a tiny surf blog is the most trivial thing in existence. Hell id cook chronic burritos for Rory and Chas sit em down and burn an L, crack some scotch and sort the shit out with em, if i had the opportunity.
Also I think the QS is a joke, want to see real competition go watch an ALAS contest. Those kids are broke AF and need the money. There isnt a single easy heat to be found.
About a year ago Rory wrote some negative press about a very close friend (Best friend and surf mate of my adult life) His angst regarding this person was unwarranted and negative. My vocalism has increased with my aging process in and out of the water. More than once I bypassed the writing on this website and headed straight to comments receiving the best laugh of all day out of this place. The writing can be good but the community makes BG the spot. I read last article thru twice felt a little wing courage to stand up for Rory. Love to know if Chas journalistic demeanor resembles himself in real life? I hope his exposure to SoCal life hasn’t washed away his coastal Oregon sensibilities. Ego is a funny existential limb.
*note: Mickey was a magnanimous individual and your right his character and demeanor will be missed. Frankly I’ve made more than one barrel in the hollow ground you call home!
Come back and make a few more! I fear chas may be stuck in the SoCal personality loop. Its easy to do, i could only take about a year and a half of it before i left. I could feel my soul being sucked away. Plus im a waaaaaayy bigger fish in my sea than i am over there.
Ahhhhhhhh Llama……I love that you are here. All of you, in fact, and from the bottom of my heart. I don’t know, exactly, what you mean by “journalistic demeanor” but I will never be an insider. I grew up on the Oregon coast surfing freezing sharky garbage but dreaming. I will forever dream. I totally agree with you that the community makes this BeachGrit tick. Re. the ego…. I’m sure I have one but I get the biggest kick out of laughing. Laughing at others but mostly laughing at myself. I am a ludicrous asshole and will forever be.
I should also note that we just lost 2M (Mickey McCarthy) and it put a whole different perspective on my life losing a person that was absolutely amazing not only as just a human being but as a mentor and a friend. To EVERYONE. I was a depressive shithead for the last few months. 2M’s passing threw me so hard in a spin that now im back to my Stoked out for everyone attitude, if only just to hold up his legacy of being a great human
Sorry for your loss Anthony… and sorry that you had to bring it up in the context of me and that Rory Parker. In truth we’re all good. I totally get why he spread his wings and flew away. I also hold myself to the same standard I hold others. Let’s make surf gossip mountains out of mole hills! The space is more entertaining that way… or at least it is to me.
It sure is, if i have to listen to one more boring ass post heat interview im gonna loose it. Beach grit is the only place that still talks a bunch of shit and i love it.
2M was such a ledge. Always a pleasure to see him all around the island. You probably didn’t have to head anywhere else if he was shooting there.
So many times i thought i was on the spot before everyone else only to come up over the dune and see that guys big ole grin. I mean hell the first board i ever paddled into a line up was hand shaped by him, then years later he became a friend and a mentor. Gonna miss that dude so much! Paddle out gonna be freakin massive though. Dont know if we have enough coastline here to accommodate the crowd…
Haha, fuck yea. He deserves every bit of that coastline.