She is Making Hawaii Great Again!
How many times have you watched the video clip of Mason Ho weaving that Pipeline monstrosity on Christmas day? Seven times? Eleven? I will cop to a full fifteen and counting.
It is magnificent!
But how did that wave arrive? Where did it come from?
Now that Rory Parker and his toothless but so angry liberalism has left the building we can tell you.
The force of nature arrived in Hawaii for the holidays (her husband is Jewish so we call them “holidays” not “Christmas”) and Made Hawaii Great Again by bringing sexy beach lingerie along with a heap of PUMPING SWELL!
Did you even know sexy beach lingerie existed?
And you still don’t believe me?
Watch this! Then watch it again and again and again and Make Hawaii Great Again!
https://www.instagram.com/p/BOfsDo3gRbl/?hl=en
Ooooooooeeeeee! Does it get any better?
Could it thrill you any more?
And do you remember the final day of the Pipeline Masters when… who won again… won? It was slop! Piddly! Kanoa Igarashi! But that is because Ivanka Trump wasn’t there yet.
Oh sure the angel’s father doesn’t believe in global warming and soon half of the ocean will be floating with plastic and nuclear holocaust etc. etc. etc. but look at this wave!
Look at this WAVE!
It is a wave I would suffer nuclear holocaust for!
Wouldn’t you?
#winning
#winners
#wieners
#MAGA
#Putin
#PutinLyphe
Chaz wants to look like Ivanka. He is slowly transforming to his true self, like Caitlyn Jenner did.
If you think I could be even half an Ivanka. Even an Ivan I’ll start transforming today!
That’s a limp dicker right there, just knowing who her daddy is.
Ah , so the Strumpette goes to Hawaii , Obama is there , so who’s pussys being grabbed , by whom and can we see a little interaction between the whites and the blacks please!
Now we miss Rory as there is an obvious penis and pussy connection there?
That shit was powerful! I need more!
Speaking of Trump, I vaguely recall an episode of “the apprentice” where “world champion” Pat O’Connell brought the wanker contestants surfing. Someone broke their ankle or got stung by a jellyfish or something like that! Anyways doesn’t this make Pat responsible for Trumps election on some level? #BlamePat
Watched the occ cast featuring Mason. I always had the impression he is an idiot, funny, but an idiot. Then he admitted that all he knows is surf and it all made sense. Stay in school kids, you’re not good enough to go pro!
Which one is the idiot? Both maybe!
Just Mason, how dare you insinuate that occ is an idiot. Ha! He does appear to have a solid drinking problem, unless pacifico is a sponsor. He doesn’t just sip the beers either, it’s more of a guzzle guzzle, ahhh type.
Yeah sorry I forgot about Occy’s Mensa membership!
Pacifico is a sponsor. Mason is fucking brilliant, he doesn’t play to the crowd though. High functioning autism is not easily understood by the masses. His motivations can not be easily understood by neuro typical people.
Does he really have autism? That would be news to me.
That is what I suppose. No inside knowledge.
Don’t mean to put you to task Chas, no wait…I do. Anyways, post the Mason barrel with better background music. Might I suggest the following:
https://youtu.be/GgQ5BJTSv9U
You’re throwing shots at Rory still? C’mon Chas, get a fucking grip. There’s always someone better than you nobody told you so?
I’m joking! Come on…give me a tiny bit of credit!
Don’t worry, I still like reading your articles.
the whole rory bailing thing was just click bait ya
who sanded THAT board!?????
Fucking Trump. I just left the U.S. for the first time since he was elected. I hop in a cab at the airport and the first thing out of his mouth is about Trump and who I voted for. Every where I turn he comes up, its fucking embarrassing.
It’s a weird thing. Now that I’ve vented about Rory’s absence, and seeing the amount of punishment Derek and Chas have had to take on from us angry adults, I feel the need to actually be active. Not that I have anything worthwhile to say…but this website is usually my first stop when I need a break from work at my desk and I’d like to see it keep on trucking. I appreciate the work you guys have put into BeachGrit and I like the information and humor I get from the site and commenters. It’s impressive what you have done with such a small team.
Feel the same way…But if Rory is leaving for his podcast thing, might want him to rethink that.
yea I loved Rory’s writing here (aside from the marital open marriage stuff), but I couldn’t get through much of his podcast. But I also am not a fan of the format.
i’d love to see a video of mason redoing his “this is my idea of the perfect wave” while including ivanka in it-but then trump might send him to siberia. how’s come if she can make waves she can’t create hair for her dad?