Official: Sharks more popular than GMAC!

A sad day for our ocean cowboys.

A few short years ago there was one surefire way to get on a mainstream news outlet, if you happened to be a surfer, and that was to go and ride giant giant giant waves.

Like Garrett McNamara and his Nazare!

Who could ever forget the cutest clip of all time? Two best pals riding around, sharing a laugh…

Oh it warms the cockles doesn’t it just though?

But it seems these salad years are over. This winter has produced some of the biggest surf in recorded history and yet I haven’t seen GMAC on any normal news channels. I haven’t seen him on CNN, ABC, NBC, CBS, TNT, TBS… None of them!

It seems like the public has tired of big big big surf. It seems like to get any attention you have to be a cute 10 year old doing a little midface cuttie while a giant great white rolls underneath you.

The above image went absolutely everywhere yesterday. Everywhere!

Poor Garrett.

Read about the boy, the shark and his father here!

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Bruce Irons

Occ-cast: Occy versus Bruce Irons!

Two old guys talk shit!

Bruce irons, who is thirty seven, recently joined Mark Occhilupo, fifty, on the Occ-Cast to speak on Bruce’s Triple Crown efforts, The Andy doco, and children. It was an enlightening conversation between two surfing legends so without further fluff, let’s dig in!

Triple Crown

Bruce gained entry to the Triple Crown through the WSL’s Nepotism Wildcard and proceeded to lose first round in all three events. His heat total average across the events teetered around seven, and I heard rumors of his initial Pipe heat being surfed half-drunk on Luke Davis’ 5’5″ fun shape. I was on the beach for that heat and watched Bruce bog and flail a few times before walking down to Pupukea for a surf of my own. This is where I would have my one and only Rory Parker sighting. At the time I wasn’t sure it was him, but I knew he was on the North Shore and this manatee-esque bodysurfer fit his description to a T. A piece he posted the following day affirmed my beliefs.

The Andy Movie

Currently without an official title, the Andy movie is set to release sometime this century. Bruce speaks candidly of the film, mentioning that he’ll only watch the finished product one time, as the experience is quite painful for a still-grieving brother. He noted that all interviewees were encouraged to be open and honest, because “nobody wants to see something sugar-coated.” And he’s right. We want the whole truth and nothing but the truth. Really looking forward to that movie.

Kids

Isn’t it wonderful how (almost) everyone in the world can come together through the concept of loving thy children? So long as your kid is not gay, doesn’t date someone from an inferior race, doesn’t choose an unacceptable route of employment, and follows your exact political leanings and athletic activities, parents are so darn accepting! In a comical banter, Bruce and Occy trade stories of pushing their kids to surf and being given the cold shoulder. Occy’s youngest gravitated towards tennis, and Bruce’s five year old won’t surf unless someone other than Bruce proposes the idea. Amazing!

Watch!

Or listen!

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Mason Ho, Derek Ho, John John Florence
"Surfer Poll, the one time of year where the top surfers in the world gather to wear skirts too small and suits too large. But then again, judging surfers on their fashion sensibilities is as pointless as trying to critique Cara Delevingne on her barrel-riding skills. People have designated lanes." | Photo: Justin Jay/@justinjayphoto

Series: Mason Ho, Dez Ho and John John!

Two world champs and a jibber walk into a bar… 

You like this ooze, this boiled-down collection of reportage from the North Shore season? With his old Nikon and a portraitist’s eye, Justin Jay hits the shutter when it matters.

With his photographs, we’re able to scrutinise the minutiae of life on the North Shore. Today, three generations of Hawaiian icons, the two Hawaiian world champions, Derek Ho and John John, and Mason, who bewitches us with his jumps and jibs.

“The Surfer Poll is the one time of year where the top surfers in the world gather to wear skirts too small and suits too large. But then again, judging surfers on their fashion sensibilities is as pointless as trying to critique Cara Delevingne on her barrel-riding skills. People have designated lanes,,” says Justin. “The attendees that chose to keep it simple with a modest black dress or a button down shirt with closed toed shoes tended to pull it off best. JJF’s well-tailored blue suit was the exception that proved the rule, while Mason Ho made the sensible choice of a Hawaiian shirt and black pants. Classic look. Although these two Hawaiian locals have very different personalities, they share at least one thing in common. They are both universally revered on the North Shore. John is the humble heir apparent and Mason is the loveable wisecracking prince. Both of them have the upmost respect for their surfing elders and the DNA of the sport. Mason loves to get loose, but he also knows just where to draw the line. Shortly after this picture, he had to politely reign in his right hand man Burger’s rowdy backstage antics.

“Just because we won this award, doesn’t mean that they won’t kick us out, Burger!”

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News: Laird Hamilton douches Sundance!

“I walk on coral for a living. This is nothing.”

When I was a young high school boy growing tall and skinny in rural coastal Oregon I dreamed of Southern California. I wanted the tan skin, the sun bleached hair, the coconut surf shop smell, the chill I-go-surfing-every-damned-day gait. I wanted it all. The only small problem was that I was growing tall and skinny in rural coastal Oregon. The sun did not shine, the nearest surf shop was 500 miles away and the surf was a giant washing machine that did not lead to a chill anything except literal chill. Like cold.

Like cold all the time. Wet cold. Get in your bones cold. Cold cold. But I wanted Southern California and was totally clueless and thought I could replicate my desires by wearing shorts every damned day. I would wear shorts in the rain, I would wear shorts in the fog, I would wear shorts in the rain. And, looking back at the few pictures that exist, I looked like a total douche.

Like Laird Hamilton!

Should we read about his recent trip to Sundance in support of his film Douche Every Wave by Laird Hamilton on the famous Page Six?

World-class surfer Laird Hamilton didn’t dress for the freezing weather in Park City, Utah, at Sundance — and stepped out in the snow in a T-shirt and flip-flops — but still managed to help people out in a blizzard.

Hamilton was on his way to the premiere of “Take Every Wave,” his new documentary from director Rory Kennedy, when their car got stuck on Main Street due to a snowstorm.

“He was wearing his uniform T-shirt and flip-flops, and he got out to help cars get off the road and park so vehicles could make their way by,” says a source. “He made it to his Q&A despite taking the time out to help people.”

When asked about the flip-flops, Hamilton said, “I walk on coral for a living. This is nothing.”

I’m on the floor laughing right now. Literally. Wearing a pair of jeans. Dying.

Ha! I walk on coral for a living! This is nothing! Ha ha ha ha ha! Somebody make it stop!

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Owen Wright
Remember when Owen Wright, who is twenty seven, hovered in world title contention in 2015 before a mysterious brain injury restricted him to occasional surfs on a softboard with his girlfriend? Now, maybe a titanic rebirth! Owen just entered February's Surfest at Newcastle, Australia. O's coach Glen Hall told the Newcastle Herald "that Wright had spoken about competing at Surfest and 'wanted to be there, but he’s not quite ready yet. He’s slowly making his progress towards a comeback, but the timeframe is still unknown for everyone, even himself,' Hall said." | Photo: WSL

Just in: Owen Wright to compete on WQS!

One-time title contender enters first pro event since brain injury at Pipe!

Oh the fragility of life. One minute you’re on the cusp of greatness, every moment a pleasant surprise, every encounter fabulous, the next you’re in a hospital unable to speak or remember a damn thing.

The story of one-time world title contender Owen Wright goes something like this: Owen was surfing Pipe in the lead up to the tour’s final contest, wiped out, came in rattled, walked back to the Rip Curl house, went to sleep, woke up disoriented and was taken to hospital where he was diagnosed with concussion and bleeding on the brain. Matt Wilko was there and says O couldn’t even speak, that his “body was out of fuel. It was scary.”

Owen’s barely surfed since.

As his pal Luke Munro told the Gold Coast Bulletin,

“I’m just glued to his Instagram to see the little steps he’s been making,” Munro said. “I just don’t think anyone knew how bad Owen’s injury was at the time … everyone thought ‘He’s hit his head, he’ll be right’ but then the extent of the injuries became clear. He wasn’t able to talk. He couldn’t remember anything from the day before … he’s a guy we all thought was indestructible…”

In the interim, Owen, who is twenty seven, has fathered a daughter with his girlfriend, the musician, Kita Alexanderand according the Newcastle Herald, has fielded an entry for the WQS 6000 Maitland and Port Stephens Toyota Pro at Merewether Beach, February 20th through 26.

He’s in, entry-wise. But is he going to show?

O’s coach Glen Hall says, maybe. 

Owen, who won Surfest in 2008, “wanted to be there, but he’s not quite ready yet,” Hall told the Newcastle Herald. “He’s slowly making his progress towards a comeback, but the timeframe is still unknown for everyone, even himself. He’s just taking it easy and easing his way into it. He’s surfing and training and he’s really happy, which is a good thing. He’s past the real serious side of the brain injury and he’s in a position where he can slowly get his back into the groove.”

If O makes it, he’ll join sister Tyler, the women’s world champ, and his lil bro Mikey.

 

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