Come and marvel and what might have been...
Son of a bitch. I just watched the clip of Dane Reynolds surfing in his new trunks (on Stab!) and the trunks are ugly but his surfing makes me weep. Makes me weep big tears of hot regret. Makes me weep big fat tears of “what if…” Makes me weep a proverbial waterfall of “Damn, girl!”
And son of a bitch. Why didn’t Dane Reynolds stay on tour? Why did he leave us without his turns?
You just got done watching Bells. And Marg before her. And just imagine what he would have done to that canvas. Just picture it in your third chakra. It would have been something to behold, truly. A renaissance masterpiece. And Tahiti coming up and Fiji and Dane in big barrels. And Rio with the samba and damn, girl.
I know the simple reasons why Dane left. I think the World Surf League was regarded as dumb back five years ago and that cool kids didn’t do the fucking wannabe tennis tour. Well guess what? It is still dumb and a fucking wannabe tennis tour. The only problem, for Dane, is the best surfers in the world are on it, cool be damned.
John John Florence, in particular, really fucked Dane Reynolds here. If John John would have sniggered and said, “Yeah. Lame.” And just done video parts and surf big barrels all by himself etc. then he would have proven Dane Reynolds right. Off tour is the place to be.
But he surfs in the events and wins and leaves us all breathless and he oops Mick Fanning to hell. On tour is the place to be. The only place, frankly, that really matters.
Am I right?
I am right.
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While my Slater design Banana gently weeps
What the fuck has he done lately other than eat donuts and break his back? John John is Lennon and Dane is McCartney. Dane could turn into Ringo any fucking day now!
Nope, you’re wrong. Your mixed metaphor of third eye and cakra shows you need to go back to the Himalayas and meditate for a while yet, surely
Isn’t the third chakra your belly? That’s where I want you to picture it!
Well then, if you intended to navel-paint a fiery red-lava canvas, I must surely stand corrected. My mind’s eye was seeing big, cool glassy walls being dissolved by some high conscious surfing. The thing in my “third” cakra was more pizza shaped.
You need to have an athlete’s mentality to succeed on the tour. Dane does not have that. As exceptionally great a surfer as Dane is, and he would win some good heats, he does not have an athlete’s mentality and would be blown away by better surfing in most heats.
jesus Wally. skating has no athletes.
I think dane is still valid in that he represents surfi g as expression versus a competitive money making venture
Competitive money making venture = former…
Dane who??
I just wish John John would come out of his Autistic closet.
Surely there is no spectrum for closets?
I’m sure he’s bummed on some level but if I was as rich as him, I’d kick back, do my thing, and break the internet every few months. Too easy
Dane knows he doesn’t need the tour. That’s the rub.
Daddy chub has made Dane’s turns all that more beefy. And it’s a beautiful thing.
I readily acknowledge the difficulty and brilliance of some of the “air” guys but any heat featuring Zeke Lau vs Connor or Jordy. Oh, my. So many man turns. Makes my knees weak.
Are you kidding? Dane is irrelevant. Completely. He needs the tour more than Wig D and ummm Caio I combined.
I used to say the same thing about JOB (he’s a fucking Pipemaster!!!) but then he did is whole “Who is JOB” thing and got more hits than almost every WSL comp…combined.
I stand corrected. You’re totally right. Hanging out in Carp, surfing Rincon, making boards, spending money on bad clothes, it’s all crap! Back to the tour where flicky turns, unsmooth airs and bad style are king!
Last two sentences are strong, and I’m not sticking up for John John. But you may be completely right.. Whats the age difference between the two. Dane has definitely found his man strength and putting some ass behind those turns past couple years..
Daddy power!
You are right. My group texts are on fire all day during a comp and have me digitally laughing with all my friends. When a sick edit drops, we discuss it on the group text for 10 minutes or so, then back to local surf conditions.
That’s exactly what I’m saying.
group texts?
Am I being fucking trolled? Ellen is still kissing that dude who is so grossed out that he has both hands in his pockets as Ellen feels his ass up. I though Negatron was going to fix this shit. How about an add for a truck or some beer or something for Christ’s sake?
Fuck you Chazz. That made me feel better.
Aye fuck mick tho.. low key
It always warms my heart that the NY comp made such a profound impact on professional surfing. Viva Bobby Martinez!
Just for your pleasure ladies and gentlemen. Time to get wet https://www.youtube.com/wat…
Fucking brilliant.
Todd Kline never got the WSL call? Once upon a time he was surfings most powerful caddy / commentator
Ironically! That NY event was run by… Paul Speaker!!
Was it really? Then maybe that was a foreshadowing of his running of the WSL. Although the surfing was great and the merch tent literally sold everything (one of the sales girls said that they couldn’t stock the shelves fast enough) the city of Long Beach wasn’t the most competent host. Hurricane Irene screwed things up but the city basically shit the bed on the festival portion. Anyway…if the WSL ever returns there will be a few of us residents who will make sure the city gets its shit together.
Don’t hold your breath
On the comp returning? Yeah…that’s likely to never happen. But hey, it’s fun to think about, right?
Nah, I like the underdog. It’s become very clear that JJF ain’t the underdog and as much as I love his surfing and how he carries himself I find myself rooting for his competitors in his heats. Give me Dane (or Bobby Martinez) all day.
Sure sure… but that’s precisely why we need Dane back! It would be so fun to watch Dane and John go head to head….
There’s always wildcards…
I’m seconding his demeanor! “Stay golden pony boy..”