Scottish surf (pictured) looks like Oregon!
Scottish surf (pictured) looks like Oregon!

Miracle: Man survives Scottish surf!

And then he survives a night floating on his board in the Irish Sea!

Once, many years ago, I paddled out to my hometown Bastendorff Beach near Coos Bay, Oregon for a lovely afternoon surf. The weather was a glorious freezing with a thick grey blanket covering the sky. The ocean was an even more wonderful freezing with giant storm fed chop heaving and lurching.

My board was a totally appropriate 6’1 Nev potato chip. I jogged to the shoreline, waded in, hoped on and began to paddle near a rock spit, dreading the upcoming ice cream headache from the upcoming 1001 duck dives. Soon, though, I was filled with an immense joy. I was halfway out to the “lineup” without having to duckdive once. What luck!

I smiled, broadly, until realizing that I hadn’t had to duckdive because I was in the world’s biggest rip. It was like a river, with rapids etc., sucking me out to sea. I paddled as hard as I could over to the rock spit and dug my fingers into its barnacles at the last possible point. My totally appropriate comp leash snapped and my 6’1 Nev bounced out to sea while I climbed the rock back to shore.

Some fish bandit Chinese is probably getting barreled on it right now.

And I only recount this story to say that rip currents are scary things! A Scottish surfer just got caught in one and ended up in Belfast, Ireland across the Irish Sea. Let’s read about him!

A SURFER has been found clinging to his board 13 miles off the west coast of Scotland more than a day after he vanished.

Matthew Bryce disappeared after setting off to go to West Port beach near Campbeltown for a day of surfing on Sunday morning.

The 22-year-old had last been seen yesterday morning about 9am in the St Catherines area of Argyll.

The alarm was raised after he failed to get in touch with family or friends since then.

Cops launched a search and urgent appeal for any sightings of the the keen surfer on Monday.

Cops confirmed he was found at around 7.30pm on Monday night and was taken to a hospital in Belfast to be checked over.

Chief inspector Paul Robertson said: “The response to our appeal to find Matthew has been outstanding.

“It has been a real team effort and I would like to thank everyone who offered their assistance.”

Belfast Coastguard coordinated the search and a large area of sea and shore was searched since lunch time on Monday.

Islay and Red Bay and Coastguard rescue teams from Campbeltown, Southend, Gigha, Tarbert and Port Ellen as well as the Coastguard Rescue helicopter based at Prestwick.

Dawn Petrie, at Belfast Coastguard Operations Centre, said: “Hope was fading of finding the surfer safe and well after such a long period in the water.

“But at 7.30pm tonight, the crew on the Coastguard rescue helicopter were delighted when they located the man still with his surf board and 13 miles off the coast.

“He was kitted out with all the right clothing including a thick neoprene suit and this must have helped him to survive for so long at sea.

“He is hypothermic but conscious and has been flown to hospital in Belfast.”

I wonder what Matthew Bryce was thinking about as he floated? Do you think he was thinking, “If this is it my surf bros better do a paddle out for me.”

When you die do you want a paddle out?

0 0 votes
Article Rating
Subscribe
Notify of
guest
17 Comments
Newest
Oldest Most Voted
longtom
longtom
9 years ago

I finger bashed a chick in a ford econovan in a carpark in Oregon after a few Henry Weinhards…….she had a fake tan……why is fake tan so popular in Oregon?

hunter biden pipe master
hunter biden pipe master
9 years ago
Reply to  longtom

I think chas meant something else when he wrote about digging his fingers into the oregon barnacles. He finger fucked the barnacles in the water, not the barneys on the beach!

?uzzled
?uzzled
9 years ago

Instead of a paddle out I would like my ashes spread from a pier on a windy onshore warm day so that I would stick to everybody’s sun lotion. That’s how I want to be remembered.

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
9 years ago
Reply to  ?uzzled

That’s a great idea.

J H
J H
9 years ago
Reply to  ?uzzled
Huckleberry
Huckleberry
9 years ago

I can relate to the sesh in Oregon, for sure. I too have had my fingers dug into the barnacles. I once watched a buddy when we were kids get sucked way way way outside, and barely make it back in to the beach. (It was actually pretty funny ( not to him )). But 13 miles? Sucked out to sea in the rip?!? That’s fucking insane. I would not like that.

hunter biden pipe master
hunter biden pipe master
9 years ago

you’re right man. id stay out… chas would have wanted it that way. also, i wouldn’t have shit to do with no grit to read

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
9 years ago

One thing he wouldn’t have been worried about was Sharks!

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
9 years ago

Don’t care about a paddle out. I just want someone to say I had a nice cutback.

Tired old guy
Tired old guy
9 years ago

This…ala L. Bertleman/ M. Purpus.., the benchmark for my era

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
9 years ago
Reply to  Tired old guy

Hey, (like me), you are old.

janeausten
janeausten
9 years ago

Good Waxer reference.

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
9 years ago
Reply to  janeausten

He couldn’t fight for shit, but he’d always be there.

janeausten
janeausten
9 years ago

Stop it, I’ll cry!
[I did piss in a Steam-Iron once, ah those were the days.]

Neal Kearney
Neal Kearney
9 years ago

Neva had a Nev but remember how chippy those suckers were! When I die I want a paddle in. Crowds are fucked these days!

Tom House
Tom House
9 years ago
Reply to  Neal Kearney

Fuck — a paddle in. Best thing I’ve read in months.

hunter biden pipe master
hunter biden pipe master
9 years ago

I’d go to your paddle out chas


17
0
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
()
x