Rip Curl's Neil Ridgway pictured here taking some bold yet fun fashion risks. Will it be enough to save his job?
Rip Curl's Neil Ridgway pictured here taking some bold yet fun fashion risks. Will it be enough to save his job?

SIMA: “Be bold! Take risks!”

Is Rip Curl's Reign of Conservative Terror officially over?

You, of course, know that the acronym SIMA stands for the Surf Industry Manufacturer Association and you might know that the group, including executive vice-presidents and team managers from across the surf industry spectrum (Billabong, TufLite, Bad Boy, etc.) gathers each year in Los Cabos, Mexico to pretend things are still rad but you probably didn’t know that SIMA’s president, John Wilson, opened the festivities with an impassioned plea.

“Be bold and take risks, stay committed and passionate to surfing and the industry that surrounds it, embrace change as opportunity, and you guys better have fun.”

My heart, for one, could not be more encouraged.

Boldness, risk-taking, passion and fun are pretty much my modus operandi. Ask Zach Weisberg, founder-in-chief of health and fitness blog The Inertia.

And can I assume this dawn of a bold, risk-taking and fun new era means that Rip Curl’s Reign of Conservative Terror is officially over?

That the cloistered, buttoned-up, afraid-of-revealing-any-fun(drug)-truth, passive-aggressive, dull, duller, dullest, bland, lying, boring, paranoid surf industry of the past decade plus has been put asunder?

Has Rip Curl’s Neil Ridgway been pushed to outer darkness? Has the World Surf League’s Graham Stapelberg been slapped from his job by the open hand of good times?

And can I also assume that some “vice-president of global marketing” positions are now open?

May I submit my resume?

Chas Smith

Career Objective:

Bold. Risks. Passion. Fun.

Core Competencies:

Can wax a surfboard above average. Etc.

Professional Experience:

Mick Fanning

References:

Neil Ridgway

Graham Stapelberg

I’m waiting by the phone and thrilled.

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Shampoo Poo
Shampoo Poo
9 years ago

Looks like The Search is officially over.

Nick Carroll
Nick Carroll
9 years ago

Why not apply for the job of WSL CEO? From what I hear, the job description will cause you to close Beachgrit for fear of being out-satirized by reality.

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
9 years ago
Reply to  Nick Carroll

Have you actually seen job description? I’m searching now! Get it? Searching?

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
9 years ago

Global VP of Rip Curl marketing? I would work for free!

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
9 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

Are you suggesting Fanning wear a tight fitting brown shirt?

Neah Kah Nie Pirate
Neah Kah Nie Pirate
9 years ago

Chas just being Chas. Great rip my beloved friend. I am oh so near your home right now I can almost taste your boner. But I’ll take this article as payment. Keep ’em coming.

Choc
Choc
9 years ago

R.I.P Rip Curl Market St Sydney store…. closing down sale on at the moment. Where will I buy my next Rip Curl brand tuff lite mini mal and Mick Fanning below knee board shorts?

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
9 years ago
Reply to  Choc

Triple upvote, one for the comment, two for the photo!

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
9 years ago

Oops

Brutus
Brutus
9 years ago

we all know that RC are the only surf Co actually making profit and that the owners are Trump supporters , and they employ surfers , Reign of Conservative Terror , ROC-T , could be the real answer to surfings demise as just a lame sport that loses money on every level , which brings me to the rich media parasites feeding off a sport that no longer has much meaning !!??

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
9 years ago
Reply to  Brutus

Maurice you fucking legend, I hope you have a biography in the pipeline!

Tired old guy
Tired old guy
9 years ago

I second the hope for a tell all biography that lays bare the inner workings of this fucked up “industry “

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
9 years ago
Reply to  Tired old guy

Have you heard of the upcoming hit Cocaine + Surfing: a love story! ?

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
9 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

Come on Chas, don’t hold out on us, what’s this story about everybody’s favourite Costa Rican Volcom rider that the surf splendour / down the line guys are getting at? Do avid beachgrit readers get dibs on advance copies? Will the inertia publish a story “Why Chas Smith’s new book may be the greatest surfing book ever, and I may walk 500 miles away from my tropical wave rich paradise to get a sneak preview!” Many questions, give me something? 1.35 am here, on the piss all day – as you may have guessed!

NEGATRON
NEGATRON
9 years ago

I don’t know… but I’d be surprised if it wasn’t just the time honoured tradition of “young dude has to much of a good time”

Nick Carroll
Nick Carroll
9 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

I am already almost crying with laughter in anticipation of the Inertia’s review of this book

Brutus
Brutus
9 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

how about Parasites , pedophiles , penis’s , please suffef me ! , a story of lust , lunacy and liars the true story of how to make a buck out of surfing!

?uzzled
?uzzled
9 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

All right Chaz, we know you smoke crack so you don’t have to keep telling us. That’s how you keep your girlish figure.

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
9 years ago
Reply to  Tired old guy

Fuck a biography. We need a Special Counsel Investigation!

NEGATRON
NEGATRON
9 years ago

As a deal sweetener, I’d be prepared to come onboard. Obviously I’d let you be my PA Chas.
Experience isn’t a issue… when I was 15 and thought working in the industry would be “Rad” I did High School work experience once a week for afew months in a Surf Shop.

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
9 years ago
Reply to  NEGATRON

You could get Sunny Garcia to do up the accounts, what could possibly go wrong?

NEGATRON
NEGATRON
9 years ago

You just got yourself out of a free pair of my Hitler youth board shorts range with that dig.

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
9 years ago
Reply to  NEGATRON

I’d be honored to serve!

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
9 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

here’s a story for you – Sebastian ‘Baste’ Duterte: The rebel surfer son of a president
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/w…

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
9 years ago

Rip curl could make you head of manufacturing in their North Korea plant, they might throw in a confederate flag and a bullwhip to sweeten the deal!

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
9 years ago

Neon wetsuits would be back in vogue in short order

Tronald Dump
Tronald Dump
9 years ago

Chas Smith: VP Global Marketing of OuterKnown


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