The "learn-to-surf" economy is booming up north!
Has your life plan stalled? Looking for a change? A way to maybe even get rich? Well look no farther than Norway! Scandinavia’s crown jewel offers stunning vistas, universal healthcare, zero “immigrants” and surf instructor jobs that pay $128 per lesson.
That’s 50% higher than the closest competitor! Or something. I failed math!
But how do I know what the various worldwide surf instructor rates are? Oh, well, surfholidays.com just released their patented Surf Lesson Price Index™ and let’s briefly scan the whole list.
It would be hard to make a fine living in even Ecuador for $22. Australia’s paltry $49 per lesson is not enough to buy an avo toast + long black. How many lessons do you think Rihanna has taken in Barbados and did she get a discount or pay the full $77? Sitting in Cornwall’s freezing cold stew does not seem worth $39 and while it is cute that Puerto Rico considers itself a first world country, I can’t imagine anyone there having $80 let alone paying that much for a surf lesson. It seems like a scam.
Many questions and thoughts but Norway. Will you quit your current job and move to Norway? I feel it would be a power move. A good look for you.
And now let us listen to Norway’s other best thing… Turbonegro.
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C’mon Chas! We expect finer research from someone of your caiber Helga looks more nicaraguan than norwegian. Women and Turbonegro aside though, we really don’t have much to offer. Waves are best in fall and winter and this summer it rained 27/21 days in June and July respectively No wonder black metal, church burning and tending to flesh are national pastimes. But don’t take it from me, a norwegian climate refugee, go see for yourselves
“It’s my way or the highway”
“Honey, if it’s your way or Norway, I’m off to Helga’s place”
Hey Chad, big fan of Beach Grit, stoked you posted our vid.
Best regards, Happy-Tom AKA the Allen Sarlo of Saltstein, Turbonegro
Compared to how the conditions are you are not making a lot of bucks, you have to travel all the way up to Lofoten and still will have a hard time finding waves. Of course it depends on the swell but its mostly flat and shitty waves compared to the rest of the world.
Local Norwegian
You should do an article on the best bands that surfers don’t know Chas.
An Infinite Series!
Never heard of them. Are they good?
Mate, probably the best band in the world. Start with Scandinavian Leather.
nooo, Apocalypse Dudes
Naah, Apocalypse Dudes
I have this fight at every rehearsal!
To avoid this scenario, I always play them back to back, so it feels like a double album that melds seamlessly.
They own!
whats the hourly rate for that?
Heidi? Heidi’s are from Germany.
She looks like a Helga.
If she walked up to you and introduced herself as “Heidi from Norway”, would you really correct her?
I wouldn’t either.
That’s true, I wouldn’t, I’m too polite.
But once I was putting some spadework into a tasty backpacker at the Currimundi Hotel.
“Where are from?” I asked.
“Scotland” says she.
“You’d like The Cranberries then” says my socially retarded mate, cruelling my chances with his geographically challenged outlook on life.
Crying laughing. Fucking cranberries to scottish lass hahahahahahaha
You know that moment when you hear something and your face reacts
totally reflecting your purest thoughts? Her look was nuclear devastation. And I was caught in the fallout zone…
She did not look unlike this. https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
To be fair. Simply buying another round and vomiting in your own hands and smearing it all over your bare chest is a tried and true tactic to let romance blossom in Scotland … ask any lassie or laddie.
128$ in norway aren´t worth a decent meal
Norway: where you spend upwards of 5hrs in the car to surf frigid, wind blown slop and your post-surf sesh with the bros will set you back a chilling 17AUD per pint.
My Surf Lesson company in the USA outsources our instruction to India. The students have to get used to using a Bluetooth in the water to hear their instructor but after some water time they form a close bond with their Indian….err, I mean Brian from San Diego with his distinctive San Diegon accent.
You forget North Korea…
But only lessons for americans… USA citzens…
For more information and values to be combined, please speak directly with Kim Jong-un.
The package includes tours to various touristic points.
I think there will be a small window for a rogue swell in Guam soon.
Locals should get out in the line up to catch the fat sets that roll in after that missile hits the water.
Turbonegro alone justifies not only this article, but Norway’s entire existence.
I just went down a 30 minute Turbonegro you tube rabbit hole, whilst “working”
You’re welcome!
While your there, can I recommend some Supersuckers and a touch of Zeke. You may be some time.
You stole the words from my keyboard!
On a trip to Sri Lanka, I met a Scandinavian girl and her boyfriend who I thought were nice enough until she mentioned that she use to share a flat with the drummer from Turbonegro. At that point, I became their best friends forever.
turbonegro are regular visitors to the ox, true.
Do they wear their leather gear to the pub? Or stick with the sailor theme?
Wise choice.
Turbonegro is the norway of old. Kvelertak is the future.
https://www.youtube.com/wat…
I can’t say I disagree with that!
When did Canada and the Dominican Republic trade flags? I totally missed the press release for that one.
They’re trying to throw North Korea off the scent.
We Canadians…I mean Dominicans are a crafty bunch. We made the flag switch and now have All the tourists surfing our small, frigid waves for $61 each!