You can ride the myth!
And here we sit just one day away from the start of the 2018 World Championship Tour feat. all your favorites minus Mick.
Are you excited? Did the time between Pipeline’s closing curtain and this moment totally drag or did you sober up enough to think, “Why the hell do I waste my time watching professional surfing?”
Well that’s rude and it might take you a few moments to get back into the swing of things but by the time the tour lumbers into Brazil this May you’ll be craving the sauce once more. Who do you think will be atop the Jeep Leaderboard in May? You can now put your money where your mouth is and exciting things will be happening re. BeachGrit and surf gambling. Stay tuned.
Do you recall what else is happening in May?
That’s right! The Founders Cup at Surf Ranch in Lemoore, California. It will be open to the public and your first chance to buy a ticket and peek inside but it won’t be your last time.
For just minutes ago a conversation was intercepted on social media by a watchful friend between a person very much involved in Surf Ranch operations. That person told another person that Surf Ranch is officially opening to the public after the Founders Cup.
Like, you can drive to Lemoore, stay at the Tachi Palace Hotel and Casino and surf the ranch just like your favorite surf journalists.
Can you believe? Do you excite?
Price per hour/session was not revealed but let’s also put our money where our mouths are here. I’ll start. I bet…. $150 an hour with a long waitlist.
Gimme yours.
Look… I have just rejected watching the Goldie… So fucking annoying Spanish southamerican commentators… Just because I am from Spain does not mean I want to hear commentators in my own language….wsl is fucked up… They are screwing the whole thing by these shitty decisions….
No
Why couldn’t Slater just gotten fat, drunk, and bitter after his masterful competitive career like a normal person? He is destroying his legacy with this nonsense(wave pool, horrible clothing company, etc.)
Better 2 cre8 than 2 h8, I say.
Fair point, I am just better at h8ing
https://youtu.be/HzSUo8iPp4M
Will be very interesting to see if this actually makes a buck, price point seems like it will have to be a little high for the average joe.
Open anti-Semitism! So old school. Also surfs a retro fish?
I just came in from a 3 hour surf, for free. Unlimited waves
Speaking of Slater is he turning up to Snapper . Surfline says probably not ?
$50 a wave, five for $250 plus on free insurance take off. Included also is meth if you are that way inclined. Gross.
Do I have to go left and right? The rights should be cheaper.
$150/hour seems low. That shit wave in Austin charges $90 per hour and people gladly pay it. KSWC should and could charge 200-300 per hour and the OC Bros from down south and the Tech Bros from up north would gladly pay it.
150 an hour? 25 bucks a wave? Umm, will the masses flock to it like seagulls on a dead whale, like crabs to a dead fish? Or well they keep their first stoke? I guess only time will tell.
I’m moving my “side hustle” to Lemoore. The Aussies love Eccies and powder. I can get that stuff on the cheap in TJ, hide it under my massive pannus (50 BMI) for the border crossing, and be in Lemoore in a jiffy. I see big things in my future….
I am pretty sure all the good ecstasy and lsd is made in San fran, way closer, good plan!!!
Wait isn’t the Methamphetamine Historical Society’s Museum and Global Headquarters located in Lemoore? Why bring tea to China?
I would guess a possible lottery style pic em wherein a deposit is required to even enter the drawing? I would absolutely pay that, enter the lotto, and pray for selection. I’m not too cool for school.
“Like, you can drive to Lemoore, stay at the Tachi Palace Hotel and Casino and surf the ranch just like your favorite surf journalists.”
hahahahahhaha
Favorite surf journalists?
you can read it several ways.
Two fight styles enter the fray: Drunken versus Wounded Gull, which will save the emporer’s daughter?
Drunken gull
ah journalists , OK , has the WSL sold out the 5000 places for the Founders Cup ,what are the admission prices , and why have the WSL started to WC Tour , and we still don’t know the format for L’amour ?????
It’s difficult taking you serious with that disguise on! https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Did he just do a bronzer in his pants, or is that his rocket, man?
If it walks like a duck…
So does this mean the Beachgrit/Carve Pro Presented by Piping Hot is moving from Honolua to Lemoore? (That’s a deep cut for my old time Grit Heads.)
Oh yeah it is! And probably.
I figure you will pay by the wave with a 6 wave package starting at $500.
Oh man, imagine the tantrums when wealthy kooks miss all 6 waves and don’t get another go
No doubt! There’ll be ATM’s inside and in your way before every exit, casino style. Fuckers will bleed their kids’ college savings accounts dry in one weekend.
I wonder if there will be frequent flier points or some shit attached.
“Yeah but honey! If I purchase another 5 sessions we can get a free upgrade to business class on a flight to Orlando!!!”
Anyone take a gander at real estate in Lemoore???? Just saying…the Tachi is a dump.
Oh you can just shut your mouth. Look at the view! https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
artichokes?
Downtrodden Latino agricultural workers.
The Dems need dem votes!
Well the Republicans don’t. Thry just arrange shit with their Russian pals.
I believe it was the other way around and they still lost!!
Nuts.
They should have kept the previous name: Southgate Bingo Palace.
Who’s idea was it to name it a Palace? Such white-eye pretentious grandeur!
Hahaha….
I think it was a view similar to that which ended up inspiring the invention of the television.
Interesting. Lemoore is Visalia-adjacent, which is Sequoia National Park adjacent, which is fucking insanely majestic! Surf, backpack, surf. You could do far worse on a visit to the US from overseas.
Or just relax in the Palace’s pool pre-Ranch! https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Maybe chance your arm at the slots! https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
You get lucky on the brickies laptop when you were there?
That’s such a natural pose…
humboldt county adjacent?
not unless you have a very expansive definition of adjacent 🙂
Since legalization all of California is Humboldt adjacent!
This is some good interceptin’ Shit, I’m gona have to up my game to keep up with all the Journalism going on.
*Journalisming
“Journalism is literature in a hurry.” – somebody else
I can’t believe Surf Ranch requires that you bring your own board to check in as collateral, after which you must choose from an assortment of Slater Designs to ride the tub! If you bring your softop, you hand that over as collateral for a firewire! Madness I tell ya!
Trade a softie for a firewire? What a horrible rip off!
what ARE you talking about ottobeenthere. all they made us do was wear a legrope.
Guess I got a bit Willie-Nillie there.
Hey Nick did I read right – Doherty wrote that next year will not feature Snapper?
Oh not quite. Since Pipe has been exnayed as a starting point for 2019, the buzz is that the start will shift to Portugal around the same date (early Feb). So Snapper won’t start the tour. That’s what Sean was explaining.
Ok will look forward to see these cost cuts come tomorrow too, and is it FB for broadcast coverage straight off the bat??
You can view events this year on all the platforms, FB, WSL site, WSL app, and on the cable channels that carry it as well.
The full switch to FB won’t happen until next year.
I will feel honored to help FB recover from this: https://www.zerohedge.com/n…
Also live on youtube
Based on your personal experience witnessing Chas’ wave shoulder carnage, would the average barney be well advised to where a helmet? How fucking shallow is it anyways?
It’s fucking four foot deep on the fucking barrel sections and if you don’t feel the need for a helmet during normal surfs I wouldn’t worry about it in the pool.
Dang it! Walked right into that barney call out.
The word “legrope” is so on the nose. Does it run from one’s “waveslidinghull” to one’s “neoprenefootwarmer”? Leash is so much sexier, kinkily bonding bootie to stick. Puurrrrrrrrr!
One of my grandfathers favorite jokes was about how literal Australians are (his side of the family was Aussie). Snowy River, Blue Mountains, brown snake etc etc.
dick head?
That is crazy!! If that is the deal whatevs. I want on and need investors on kauai. We have land that people will donate!!! Someone smart start a crowdfunding campaign!!! Zuckerberg do the right thing you little nerd!!!!
Why would you think for one second that that is the case? Seriously, if I said Laird picked up a new sponsor*. And that sponsor’s ad department presented the following story board: Laird SUP’n using a big ass tampon for an oar, with the catchline “hey girl! If it’s good enough for me to SUP up period and keep the line-up safe, it’s good enough for you!”, you would believe me?
Seriously, I kid….I kid!
*tampon company
Is the company called Tiger Tampons and features a large shark on the package?
Tiger Lair’d Tampons and the package features a shark jumping Laird with a blood red setting sun in the background.
You’re not smart enough to start a crowdfunding campaign? All you got to do it fill out a couple boxes on a website. Zuckerberg is too busy dealing with all the roosters I keep letting go along ‘his’ property line to help with a pool.
I feel like I would need to know a wavepool designer at least! None will return my emails.
You need to start your email with ‘Hello wave pool designer, I have $50 million dollars and I want a pool.’ All of them will return your emails I guarantee it.