Dawn patrol, localism, surf rage.
The choreography of the Olympics is always spectacular and the only people who disagree are 40-something men who struggle with their sexuality. The pomp and circumstance inspire. The post-modern dance routines at the opening and closing ceremonies etc. and I was beyond excited to learn today that the organizing committee in Japan, for the 2020 Games, is planning an event that will “introduce the culture of surfing” to the world.
Let’s first read some specifics in the Japan Times about an extended waiting period before getting down to brass tacks.
As surfing competitions are dependent on suitable weather, including sufficiently large waves, tickets will be sold for a total of four extra days, falling either side of the scheduled July 26-29 competition, according to the source.
Surfing will make its Olympic debut next summer at Tsurigasaki Beach in Chiba Prefecture with two events — the men’s and women’s shortboard.
Tickets for the additional days will cost ¥3,000 ($27), the same price as for scheduled competition days.
The tickets will be non-refundable in principle, the source said. Organizers are planning alternative entertainment, such as an event to introduce the culture of surfing, for competition days as well as days on which competitions are not held.
Ok. I can barely sit still and am DEFINITELY putting my name in for the artistic director of the event to introduce surfing culture.
Here’s what I’m thinking:
A giant stage stretches out before the audience. As the lights slowly get brighter they can see it’s a parking lot. A lone actor peers out to sea. The announcer says, “Dawn patrol.”
Suddenly from one of the corners a bunch of “grumps” come and dance around the lone actor, snapping their fingers aggressively. He dances back. The scene is filled with incredible tension. The announcer says, “Localism.”
After a few minutes one of the grumps grabs the lone actor’s leash and gives it an aggressive tug. Another punches his neck with an open-closed fist. The announcer says, “Surf rage.”
End scene.
It’s still a work in progress. Got any other ideas?
Commented on Disqus? Log out, tap the Disqus button, and your old name and comments come back. The box is ours.
Your comments are still here. Every one of them.
Twelve years of BeachGrit comments came across from Disqus. Connect and we will show you how many are yours. We get your username, nothing else.
Connect Disqus to reveal.
it will just ve a row of serious looking ‘surf bosses’ quietly staring at you with arms crossed.
You love that movie doncha.
Link Wray lost a lung in Korea. Tough S.O.B.
As woman with surfboard approaches both lone surfer and grumps collectively point her away and she slopes off dragging feet ever so slowly, head down body language defeated. Announcer “Back in your box, rib !”
I got a two-year Monbukagakusho scholarship to learn Japanese and study Japanese surfing culture a while back (early 2000s). I lived in Kamogawa which has decent surf and spent most of my time surfing and trying to meet surfing nurses from Kameda Hospital. I also managed to make a little film about a valiant Japanese adult learner surfer. Can I join your artistic direction team?
Shit, I just rewatched it after 10 years and realised it’s shit. Explains why I didn’t become a filmmaker. Is talent optional on your team?
You got a link to the film?
Sorry, it’s too embarrassing for me to share that one. It’s 20 minutes long and nothing happens. He catches one wave and falls off straight away. I don’t know what I was thinking when I made that. Here’s something short and fun from the same time: https://www.youtube.com/wat…
This one is pretty fun too, I think:
https://www.youtube.com/wat…
I was in Chiba last week. The surf was way better than I was expecting (mind you I was not expecting much). It’s a bit of a weird place to showcase surfing culture because Japanese surf culture is so different to everywhere else. For example you just leave your wetsuit to dry on a handrail anywhere. And they carry around drums of hot water in their car to shower with afterwards (that concept blew me away TBH). I guess it will be a Hawaiian culture thing in the end. But the Japanese love Hawaii.
I was impressed by all the bikes with board racks on the side in Shichirigahama and Kugenuma. Local surfers cruising around, living the life!
My mate lived there and on the way to work saw a briefcase on a rail platform then saw it again on the way home.
He also took any bike he liked and shipped them home.
A friend of mine in the same student dormitory was out drinking one night and got lost in the suburbs of western Tokyo and borrowed someone’s bicycle and potplant to see if he could speed up the getting-home process. Unfortunately for him a police car came along and stopped him and asked a few too many questions and he ended up spending the night at the police station.
He had to say sorry with real feeling to get out of trouble. 🙂
Bongs, unshaven/ unwashed and a short stint in Kerobokan as an ode to Wiggs
Put burger on live tv in Bali
The only thing really important and necessary for the 2020 Olympic Games in Japan is to honor Akira and his distopic future accuracy!!!
With a distopic, hallucinated and chaotic opening to the sound of…
Kaneda!
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Akira – Kaneda’s theme
https://www.youtube.com/wat…
I sure hope there is 2 hour session where a Chris cote impersonator will explain the subliminal messages of floral shirt print and how to correctly calculate the degrees of rotation when a surfers hops on a wave. they can also have a “Bondi VR beach experience” hand over 20 bucks and get blindfolded, have sand dropped down your pants, your feet cut with broken glass and multiple foreign languages yelling around you. then when you go to wash off afterwards the remaining contents of your wallet is nicked. for $200 you get your bean stretched by an incredibly sunburnt European.
oh, and don’t forget to have Joel Tudor explain how he came up the 3 eyed smiley followed by some Q and A and duct tape.
A reasonably affluent Californian man in his early 40s agonises over what volume his next Firewire should be.
The end.
You forgot, the announcer says, “VAL.”
That’s easy. Your age minus one.
i’m also old, do the math…
This is old, Aguerre said long ago that there’s going to be a festival that will show the world the environment of surfing. As you did with Sophie, you stop in the BS and bypass the real news in the story. C- for ya Chas.
If you’re telling me the real news is a 12 day waiting period then…… I’m sorry, You’re right. I got carried away.
Don’t be sorry Chas. If you “stop in the BS” and “bypass the real news in the story”, then you’re doing surf journalism, which is fun, may not be news, but certainly never gets old in the crazy mixed up culture we inhabit.
Yes you did. No worries, happens all the time. News: The fact that the organizing committee is preparing to sell tickets for extra days in case the waves dont show up and the 3000 yen for the tickets.
Boring…
The interpretive dance routine will have to carry the day. An announcer saying “Localism” at the Japan Olympics may fall short of conveying our culture because well, you know, it’s Japan and…and you know….don’t make me say it.
Rocarism ? There ya go Otto and I don’t even speak Japanese.
Uh yeah I think waxing windscreens and leash-tugging is kookslams material in comparison to the kinda shit their beach regulators will demonstrate.
Men’s and Woman shortboards? Elo’s Gonna be upset.
supset?
Local volunteers skip through the audience/car park, waxing windscreens or spectacles.
A jetski rolls off the stage and lovingly caresses rows 1-8.
Shakas and açai bowls are thrown.
The star of the show overdoses.
This is coming together very nicely.
There has to be a shin length Rising Sun Billabong board short dance of some sort with all dancers carrying replica Andy Irons Rising Sun airbrushed surfboards.
Chas! My god, have you seen what the WSL is doing this year? The Atlas All-Event Pass!! A VIP experience at every event, all day food and drinks and who KNOWS what other experiences! For $1,299!! I am not kidding. This is gonna leave any Olympic beach party in the Shade.
You’ll need a metaphoric reference for surf brands repeated failed expansion into mainstream markets. And Jeff Spicoli’s smoke filled van.
Good, good… I really like where your head’s at here.