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UFC hall-of-famer and survivor of horror near-death episode in wavepool, Baby Jay “BJ” Penn, to run for governor of Hawaii! “We will get rid of all vaccine passports. Hawaii will be vaccinated with Aloha!”

"I am not here to fit in with the other politicians, I am here to get our freedoms back!"

One of MMA’s greatest, the Hawaiian who took the spotlight off the UFC heavyweights and turned it onto the little guys, has announced his candidacy for governor of Hawaii. 

Hawaiian-born Jay Dee Penn, who is forty-two and of Irish-American and Korean-Hawaiian descent, posted a clip from the movie Sparta with the following call to arms, 

I’ve made a lot of mistakes in my life but I would never run from a fight or sell out my people. As soon as I step into Hawaii’s Governor office I will remove All new federal and state mandates that have been hurting our economy, residents, and ‘ohana. We will get the best doctors, medicines, therapies, and health care the world has to offer to fight this pandemic and always keep Hawaii among the safest and healthiest states in the union. We will get rid of all vaccine passports. Hawaii will be a vaccinated with Aloha and Unvaccinated with Aloha policy for everyone. Same with the masks 😷. We will follow the constitution to the tee 👌. I am not here to fit in with the other politicians, I am here to get our freedoms back!

The election takes place on November 8, 2022, with the incumbent, democrat David Ige, ineligible to run due to govs being allowed only two terms. 

BJ was in the news two months ago when he was recounted his near-death episode at a wave pool. 

Last year when I got sucked into a wave pool engine room and thought I was going to die… I kept thinking “don’t die for your kids” I was surfing for a about an hour and the line started getting longer to catch the wave. I was sitting next to the owner of the wave pool by the “wall” where the waves come from. The first wave it shoots out is a dud to get everyone ready for the next wave. The dud wave came back and because I was so close to the wall the wave swallowed me and pushed me and my surfboard underneath a huge cement wall. I remember feeling like I was getting sucked in a pipe and at that moment I got scared. It ended up pushing me into a big dark cement room that fills up with water to push the next wave for the wave pool. It felt like I was in the movie SAW or Final destination. The room would fill up with water to the top and I would hold my breath and then it would push the water out to make the wave and it was really rough inside there. Everything I bumped up against in the room that hurt me got infected. I got a bad sinus infection and a couple facial fractures from getting knocked around the cement walls and from the fractures the dirty water got in my face and infected my whole sinus. I was on antibiotics for three weeks for my face. While I was in the wave pool engine room I knew that one of my friends outside from big island is a legendary surfer and I knew he would come in there to rescue me so I stayed calm. A lot of other people might have panicked and maybe gave up but I just stayed strong for my kids. Anyway to make a long story short I survived that mother fucker 😛😛😛 !! The name of the people and water park have been left out. I not the kine guy shows up to your house to play and gets hurt and tries to sue you so all love ❤️ to everyone who helped me get there and helped me survive 🤙 Maybe I was the first guy in history to get sucked into a wave pool engine room while it is in operation but no matter what happens in life and no matter how scary it is if I can offer you any advice I would just say to “stay calm”. If I didn’t fight tough cunts my whole life I might have panicked, but it was just another day in the office

Shane Dorian, who was the legendary Big Island surfer who saved BJ, replied,

“Happy you kept it together down there. That was really terrifying. Live to shred another day!”

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Laird's performance mushroom

Great, and then you can balance the budget with Ohana

DavidC

The big question with this guy is how fucked up is this guy’s brain – maybe I’m a total wimp but I have no inclination in watching guys beat the shit out of each other.

Low wide stinkbug stance

I was quoting Mike form the Young Ones, there’s a scene where they are all out of character sitting around in the studio and Mike goes “Alexei who?”

DavidC

Pop-up Toasters!

Dim Sim

What does a fruit salad of irish american korean hawaiian genes actually mean? Fuck this nonsense, as if anything other than immediate parents matter in terms of how one behaves and where one gets to. Yes, history matters but it matters less than present.

Hot stuff

Thanks Sigmund!!

Gil Gunderson

Hey, does anyone know when the aloha will be available in Aus?

Hot stuff

Very!

Picard Madeoff

If only Ronnie G was still with us to be his bodyguard

Dung beetle

Is anyone gonna tell him vaccine mandates are constitutional?

84092, 92673

never ending vax’s and lockdowns forever has already gone all wrong.

PRN

Let’s Go Brandon!!!

Urchin Sepsis

You’d think not having a grate on the intake would be a obvious design flaw.

Filipe’s Fat Tire

Dude looks like Mussolini in that picture 😬

Stick man

who?

paulo de tarso

Ahhh…
Nothing like the free and quick possibility of a socio-psychological study between an uncultured and illiterate semi-adult citizen like MMA fighter BJ Penn, and a fully literate and cultured adult citizen like Liverpool’s coach Jurgen Klopp
Fantastic see a kid and a man talking about the same thing…
Oh… these damn europeans colonizers…

Pauly Matt War-Shore

This story would’ve caused a much bigger stir in the comments had it been posted on swellnet.

Low wide stinkbug stance

Alexei who? ;D

Heysoos

seems like the perfect candidate

V3 Rocket

I’m just relieved I got my second shot of Aloha back in August


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