Screenshot: Daryl Jones.
Screenshot: Daryl Jones.

Bodyboarder receives international condemnation after challenging protected sea lion to beach fight in New Zealand!

Battle royale!

If there is one species that I have no sympathy for, it is the stinky sea lion. Oh how they vex, how they frustrate, how they smell. My wonderful best friend, you see, has a beautiful sailboat in Newport Beach’s harbor and the creatures regularly climb aboard and reek the place up whilst also causing stress fractures due their general fatness.

Various anti-sea lion measures have, of course, been deployed but they are all toothless as sea lions are protected in Newport and anything that might work is met with a stiff fine.

They are also, apparently, protected in New Zealand where a bodyboarder is receiving international condemnation for challenging one of the bastards to a beach fight, swinging his craft wildly and making a tactical retreat.

Daryl Jones happened to be perched near the St. Clair Hot Water Pool where he captured the scene after noticing the sea lion refusing to let the bodyboarder boogie by strutting side to side on the shoreline.

“I’ve been a pāua diver years ago, I’ve been surfing here for 30 years, I’ve encountered them heaps of times – they’re all bluff. They’re just inquisitive,” he told the Otago Daily Times after sharing his advice that the bodyboarder should have simply backed away and waited five minutes.

The local biodiversity ranger countered that the bodyboarder should have simply frozen and called him “ignorant.”

“They’re a big animal, they’ve got sharp teeth, you’re confronted with them, you get all the fight-flight emotions coming into play, and so you can do silly things, he said. “They’re not actually there to bite you or eat you or whatever people think they might be there to do. They’re just being playful and you can give all the wrong signals by just being scared. But you can also do the right thing if you just go into freeze mode.”

Animal rights activists have piled on, calling it “unbelievable behavior,” but none of them have friends with boats so what do they know?

Go bodyboarder go!

Watch video here.

Kelly Slater partners with vintage pop sensation Crowded House for band merch and stars in band’s new video, “Love Isn’t Hard at All”!

“Just like the ocean floor, you’re relatively unexplored. Who are you?”

Vintage pop sensation Crowded House, the New Zealand troupe best known for their 1987 chart topper  Don’t Dream It’s Over, have built the official video for their latest song entirely around old WSL footage of Kelly Slater at the Pipeline Masters. 

The lyrics pack an emotional punch, wise and joyous, the almost fifty-year-old Slater’s moves entwining Neil Finn’s words like an old vine. 

Let’s go
The world awaits
Or save it for a rainy day above you

We can try
All kinds of ways
To send me to an early grave below you

It wouldn’t hurt to hear you say
Although it’s just a turn of phrase
“I love you”

And in the dark
I hear the call
It feels like love isn’t hard at all
The sun comes up and I see you lost in thought

Those eyes are miles away
They’ll take your mind on holiday
Where are you?

I’ll help you

A man works hard
To find his shape
Knowing where he stands
And how much of this he can take
The song the siren’s make
Getting loud as the swell’s about to break

And will I float when the life boat goes under?

Just like the ocean floor
You’re relatively unexplored
Who are you?

And from the deep
I hear the call
It feels like love isn’t hard at all
My head comes up and I’m ready
Fear no more

Engagement on the song after one-and-a-half months live has been subdued, twenty k plays or thereabouts.

The video comes as the band announced their collaboration with Slater’s famously sustainable clothing brand Outerknown, offering two different tees at forty-three American dollars on the US site (eight-four Australian dollars on the Australian site) apiece, and a sweater for two c-notes Australian or a hundred and twenty if you’re buying from the US site.

Hell of an exchange rate. 

Pre-order here.

Coleman told FBI agents, “that he was enlightened by the QAnon and Illuminati conspiracy theories and was receiving visions and signs revealing that his wife...possessed serpent DNA and had passed it onto his children… Coleman said that he was saving the world from monsters.”

Popular Santa Barbara surf school owner who allegedly stabbed his two toddlers to death with a spearfishing gun reportedly “despondent and feeling hopeless” in prison, “He’s working through why he made the choices he made.”

"He’s reflecting on the mistakes he made in life and wondering if there’s any chance for redemption."

Five months ago, a Santa Barbara surf school owner was arrested in Mexico after his two children, aged 3 and 11 months, were found stabbed to death with a spearfishing gun.

Matthew Taylor Coleman, who owns Santa Barbara’s Lovewater Surf School with his wife Abby took the couple’s children, Kaleo and Roxy, to Mexico without telling friends or family.

Video footage from Rosarito, just south of the United States/Mexico border, showed Coleman checking into a hotel with the two children and leaving very early Monday morning before returning later, alone, to check out.

A farm worker saw blood on the ground and his dogs discovered the bodies of the two toddlers nearby, stabbed multiple times with a spearfishing gun.

Coleman, who was detained by waiting U.S. Customs and Border Protection agents when he tried to re-enter the US, told the FBI, “that he was enlightened by the QAnon and Illuminati conspiracy theories and was receiving visions and signs revealing that his wife…possessed serpent DNA and had passed it onto his children… Coleman said that he was saving the world from monsters.”

Coleman said he was motivated by the QAnon conspiracy theory that holds that Donald Trump had been secretly battling a wildly high-profile cabal of Satanist pedophiles.

Now, a long-time family friend who received a hand-written letter from the alleged kid-killer has told People magazine Coleman is feeling “despondent and hopeless” in prison and “He’s alone with his thoughts 24/7. He’s reflecting on the mistakes he made in life and wondering if there’s any chance for redemption… He poured out his heart… He begged for forgiveness, but says that he’s now where he deserves to be.”

The friend added, “He said he’s sorry, that he never wanted to cause pain, and that he’s working through why he made the choices he made. It was a very sad note.”

If found guilty, Coleman, who is currently in protective custody, faces the death penalty. 

Do it get cuter?
Do it get cuter?

World champion CJ Hobgood set to enter renowned East Coast Surfing Hall of Fame: “Swaying palm trees in Bali, thunderous waves in Oahu and champagne toasts off the coast France!”

Pop the Prosecco!

One of the most well-loved surfers in the entire world, and 2001’s champion, CJ Hobgood has led a storied life. Born a twin, becoming the model for the NSSA logo, Rookie of the Year on the 1999 Association of Surfing Professional’s main tour then winning it all in 2001, Clifton James has lived, lived and lived again.

And now, in mere days, he is set to join brother Damien in the East Coast Surfing Hall of Fame. A party will fete his induction January 5th at 5:00pm at the Orange County Convention Center in Orlando as part of the famed Surf Expo (tickets here).

In case you are a younger girl an ill-informed, you can learn all about his accomplishments and travails in the award-winning documentary And Two if by Sea.

Or you can listen to CJ shine on Dirty Water.

Florida Today describes CJ’s journey thusly:

Swaying palm trees in Bali, thunderous waves in Oahu and Champagne toasts off the coast of France. It was all part of the jet-setting lifestyle for professional surfers CJ Hobgood and Danny Melhado.

Of course, along with the glamor, there were bumps, bruises and broken bones, not to mention the thousands of miles and hundreds of days spent away from home, hauling a quiver of surfboards through airports, and eating exotic, yet strange-looking, foods.

Now, oceans apart, their legacy connects again Wednesday evening when both South Brevard legends are inducted into the 25th edition of the East Coast Surfing Hall of Fame.

CJ adds, “I don’t know if this ever pops up on your radar when you’re growing up. I think surfing was still kind of counter-culture back then; maybe you’d get like one mention on ‘SportsCenter,’ but I couldn’t imagine (what it became).”

The greatest show ever.

Surf Journalist shocked to discover that alcohol consumption is not the pathway to healthy sleep, recovery!


New Year’s Eve is a time for many activities that would, on any other day, be frowned upon. There is the wearing of strange cardboard glasses and/or hats, the lighting of explosives, the public singing and, of course, the consumption of alcohol.

Now, any other New Year’s Eve I would have enjoyed a glass, or two, of champagne without thought. This New Year’s Eve, though, I was in Italy with my personal digital fitness and health coach, my WHOOP strap, and drinking one, or two glasses of Prosecco without thought.

That night, after wandering past many Italians lighting explosives, publicly singing with the number 2022 covering their eyes, I made it to bed and proceeded to have a fitful night’s sleep.

Consulting my WHOOP, the following morning, I realized that my measurables were all over the place. Wacky heart rate variability and resting heart rate numbers. Lousy recovery.

Intrigued, I immediately dove into the research. According to WHOOP’s many scientists:

Heart rate variability (HRV) and resting heart rate are two of the most useful metrics for quantifying your fitness on a daily basis. Consuming alcohol causes your HRV to drop (bad) and your resting heart to rise (also bad).

With the WHOOP Journal feature, our members are given the option of noting whether or not they have any alcoholic drinks each day. From a Performance Assessment analysis representing everyone on WHOOP, when they report consuming alcohol (even just a single drink) their HRV drops by an average of 7 milliseconds, and their resting heart rate increases by an average of 3 beats per minute.

It should come as no surprise that of all the behaviors available to record in the WHOOP Journal, drinking alcohol is the one with the single greatest negative impact on next-day recovery. On average, WHOOP members’ recovery is 8% lower when they log consuming alcohol the day before (again, this includes everything ranging from one drink to several).

Well who would have ever guessed? Speaking of, did you read about CNN’s New Year’s Eve program co-host Andy Cohen continually say he was “over-served” after delivering many snarky remarks on air?

“I was a bit over-served…”

What a dumb turn to phrase.

2022, anyhow, already seeing a better me.

Buy a better you here.