Lost footage of longboard legend Robert “Wingnut” Weaver uncovered in WSL’s war against original surfing: “You can’t handle the truth… you want me on those waves!”

Continued shame.

Our World Surf League has blown multiple narratives since transitioning the Association of Surfing Professionals to its current visage six-ish years ago but maybe none more than the recent blowing of professional longboarding. The format most practiced by most has, recently, been mocked and fun made and goofed upon at the very highest levels in professional surfing’s executive suite even though starving fans crave the sweet science.

Read here here here etc.

Silly business, especially seeing that the aforementioned League one day dreams of making surfing a business but are you not convinced?

Do you need a passionate defense of the merits of our favorite pastime’s origins?

Well, a just uncovered clip, featuring the legendary Robert “Wingnut” Weaver has resurfaced and that aforementioned League should be extremely bummed.

You will certainly remember Wingnut from his star turn in The Endless Summer II. As a younger Oregonian child, I drove three hours each way to watch Bruce Brown’s other masterpiece, also starring Pat O’Connell, in the theater.

Did you do that?

Surf bonafides burnished.

Continued shame, anyhow, on the World Surf League.

Or as Noa Deane proclaimed…

And thanks to The Surf Network for lost footage. Much more is there and only the foolish don’t subscribe.

Be best.

Miley-Dyer (right) being extremely rude.
Miley-Dyer (right) being extremely rude.

Professional longboard fans intentionally and hurtfully belittled by World Surf League, forced to turn to static Surfline beach cams in order to watch heroes and heroines compete in championship tour kick-off!

The plight of our longerboard brothers and sisters has taken another turn toward the un-chill. It was reported, here, yesterday that their champion tour season opener was kicking off in Manly, Australia except with zero promotion headed in. Fans became outraged, taking to various social medias and demanding account. This, of course, another in a long line of indignities spooned upon their surf bucket hat heads by the World Surf League.

You will certainly recall, months ago, when it was rumored that the WSL was set to cut the longboarding world tour from three events to one. Sitting champion Joel Tudor caught wind and wondered about equality. The WSL quickly suspended him indefinitely for one year then proceeded to rub salt in that festering wound by announcing that three stops would be kept but two of them would be Manly and Huntington Beach. Tour commissioner Devon Howard resigned his post, forthwith, maybe not wanting to see his beloved dance soiled so.

And so yesterday Manly kicked off, with zero promotion and also zero coverage. No stream, no announcers, nothing but an Instagram message from WSL Senior Vice President of Tours and Head of Competition, and now longboard commissioner, reading, “I’m happy to be here in Manly to kick off our first event of the @wsl World Longboard Tour yesterday, and to be here supporting this group of surfers on the road to the World Title.”

She included a very unflattering photo drop, continuing the fun-making.

Well, Miley-Dyer may have been mocking with her own two eyes but the long-suffering longboard fan was locked out and forced to turn to static Surfline cameras for a fix.

Professional longboarding, at its very highest level, treated worse than a junior 1000 event.

Will fans revolt entirely? Will their heroes and heroines?

Currently more questions than answer.

Leyshon (pictured) concerned.
Leyshon (pictured) concerned.

Australian man goes wildly viral after unidentified sea creature vigorously bumps him while sitting on surfboard at Snapper Rocks!


Virality sure is a strange phenomenon, no? Moments captured and posted to social media that then, somehow, someway infect society racing from phone to phone, direct message to direct message until a little-known man or woman is suddenly, overnight, internationally famous.

Well, lightly-known bodyboarder Dan Leyshon, who hails from Australia, is currently experiencing the burning hot spotlight as his TikTok has just received hundreds of thousands of new visitors after he posted a video of himself sitting on a blue surfboard out at Snapper Rocks when someone, or something, swims under him and provides a vigorous jolt.

Leyshon wastes no time in paddling to shore and captioned the clip “Don’t panic unless it’s time to panic.”

You must watch here and ponder greater truths like “what would I have done had the same happened to me?”

Online sleuths immediately began wondering if the bumper was a shark, a killer whale or Gold Coast legend Dean “Dingo” Morrison.

Possible but there can be no certainty.


Hopefully Leyshon can use the new attention to reach higher rungs of fame and/or fortune.


Despite its social progressiveness, how will professional longboarding ever achieve the WSL’s goal of mainstream crossover success when it is so impenetrable, so inscrutable?

A quandary wrapped in a short john.

The WSL longboard tour kicked off at Manly yesterday as an addendum to the Challenger Series event.

The old Jayco pop-top caravan hitched to the back of a late-series Landcruiser. Impractical. Outdated. But undeniably cool, or at least the WSL hoped.

It was a day for it. Beautiful autumn conditions. A weak twofoot swell lolling into the Manly bay. Light offshore winds. Just enough angle to offer the peaks and rincons so coveted by the plus-sized crew.

Twenty men and twenty women from across the globe. Each out to taste success under (now former) Tour Commissioner Devon Howard’s revamped, old-is-new criteria.

Longboarding can be beautiful, too. But it is also subjective.

Subtle shifts of weight, almost imperceptible nuances in movements are often seemingly the only discernable difference in scoring rides.

Brazil’s Chloe Calmon was one stand out. She would cut back, stalk the pocket. Set her rail. Cross step to the nose. Her toes splayed out like breadsticks on a charcuterie. She would hold it. Hold it. Then shuffle back down as the wave imploded. A nine point three.


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Competitive longboarding is topical, too. Relevant. Not just because the incumbent world champion is banned from competition. Or because the tour commissioner has become deposed before the tour even started.

It is topical because it is a champion of gender equality and transgender rights. Readers of libertine surf media like BeachGrit, men amongst other men, mainly, ponder the moral implications of a Manly logger transitioning to women’s competition and wiping the floor with her opponents.

It’s a quandary wrapped in a short john. One made even more topical by the local Manly conservative candidate Katherine Deves in the lead up to this weekend’s federal election.

It seems less of an issue in real life, though.

It was definitely not an issue for the surfers down there on the fine-grained Manly beach.

Harrison Roach moved with the sleekness of a Navy destroyer. Parted the water like it was scripture. The jerky, spasmodic shortboarder would quiver in pathetic fear as this majestic vision of steeze slid past. He would cut into the pocket. Set his rail with a subtle upwards inflection. Cross step to the nose. His toes flopped over the edge like indolent teens hanging out the side of a pool on a summer’s afternoon. He would hold it. Hold it. Hold it. Then shuffle back down the board as the wave imploded. A seven.

One question I did have about the transgender thing, though. If somebody transitioned, could they then travel back in time to fuck their younger self? It would be just like the grandfather paradox, but the other way around. Obviously they can’t self-impregnate, but then again Michael J Fox almost fucked his mum in Back to the Future.

What sort of havoc would that cause? Has anybody asked Katherine Deves or the BeachGrit commentariat about that?

These are the important questions.

Phil Rajzman was another famous name in the water. He was more aggressive in his approach than the others. He would shoot up and grip his toes to the nose like a marine grips his M16. He would hold it. Hold it. Hold. Shoot back down the board as the wave imploded. But he was unable to throw his patented chop-hops now the tour has taken its own Back to the Future path. Four point seven.

And that was about it.

Some won their heats. Others did not. There was no real discernible difference to the naked eye. Despite its social progressiveness, despite its undeniable sense of cool, how will professional competitive longboarding ever achieve the WSL’s stated goal of mainstream crossover success when it is so impenetrable, so inscrutable? So hard to read?

Not like our shortboarders, thankfully.

The competition will now continue, intermixed with the Challenger series event.

Medina and Valverde, rumoured lovers, but not for long, according to noted Brazilian psychic.

In bombshell prophecy, world surfing champ Gabriel Medina will ditch rumoured lover Isis Valverde, reunite with ex-wife Yasmin Brunet and become a father, according to Brazilian psychic,“It’s not over between them… That girl is still going to have his baby!”

"Their mission in each other's lives isn't over, she's going to get pregnant."

Five days ago, Simone Medina, the mammy of three-time world champ Gabriel Medina, whom she hasn’t spoken to in two years, lit up Brazil TV with her revelation she knew her lil man’s marriage to model Yasmin Brunet was doomed from the start. 

“I knew it wouldn’t last. I said it to myself… I know him. Gabriel is intense in everything. He is intense to fall in love, intense in everything, and passion ends. It wasn’t love.” 

Now, renowned Brazilian psychic Lene Sensitiva, and the work of mediums, conduits of a mysterious other-world, able to communicate with goblins and fairies, is something I’m real fascinated by, has told Brazil TV Gabriel and Yasmin will soon reunite and the model will give birth shortly thereafter. 

The prophecy was revealed when she was asked on a TV show if there was a future between Medina and his rumoured lover, the actor Isis Valverde.

“None, it will end and he will still get back with his ex,” Sensitiva said. “It’s not over between them yet, their mission in each other’s lives isn’t over, so they’ll come back. That girl is still going to have his baby, she’s going to get pregnant.”


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Wonderful news, of course, for who don’t love a happy ending, especially a marriage that existed for only a little more than a year.

There’s a caveat emptor here.

I ain’t sure about ever reuniting with someone you’ve cut loose or been cut loose by. There’s a fundamental grimness and maybe a fatal blow to the sexual ego that comes with revisiting a body that has become grotesquely sexual with others in the interim.

How do you deal with the squawk of the static in your head?

Does it ever go away?

Or is a bitter gruel you must eat every single day, the taste weakening only after many years?