Nathan Fletcher (pictured) not booking travel to Laguna any time soon.
Nathan Fletcher (pictured) not booking travel to Laguna any time soon.

In wild power play, tony Laguna Beach seeks to wrest control of local coast from Orange County in order to force draconian smoking ban!

"Get your filthy habit out of our town!"

Internecine war has broken out in the most unexpected of places, overnight, as tony Laguna Beach, hugging the most gorgeous stretch of Southern California coast, is attempting to wrest control of local beaches from ruling Orange County so it can impose a draconian smoking ban.

Ken Domer, Laguna’s assistant city manager, said the move would tax the coffers some $2.2 million a year but would be very much worthwhile because anti-smoking spies could be installed at various high towers.

“The contract lifeguards for the county are basically looking eyes on the water all the time, whereas our lifeguards are city employees,” Domer declared at last Tuesday’s city council meeting. “They’re looking at not just the water and doing an exemplary job, but also the quality of life issues that are on the beach around them.”

Laguna is, of course, famous for its art scene but it is a very different art scene from, say, New York City’s east village where cool cats used to toy with the idea of meaning, splattering canvases and hacking grits.

No, Laguna’s scene is more… Pageant of the Masters.

Have you ever seen it?

Pageant of the Masters

Yeah.

No word if vaping will be banned as well but it seems likely.

More, clearly, as the story develops.

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FL Skunk Ape
FL Skunk Ape
3 years ago

Never heard of this Tony Laguna Beach character? Who is he?

munnstrosity
munnstrosity
3 years ago
Reply to  FL Skunk Ape

I dunno but he’s mentioned twice. We’re lucky BG journalists have access to these shady, behind the scenes players.

Brutus
Brutus
3 years ago

damn stop smelling my Butt!!

Stick man
Stick man
3 years ago

Cig Vicious!

surfshiny
surfshiny
3 years ago

Ummmm, OK. It’s a beach, there’s wind, open space. Agree that littering is not cool but perhaps we are demonizing smokers a teeny bit too much these days? Morning surf check, coffee and a cigarette seems reasonable enough without a lifeguard hassling and ticketing me.

Full disclosure: I live in Europe and smoke cigarettes from time to time (totally acceptable behavior) but visit my SoCal hometown often (smoker = outcast of society) where my weed blazing friends also beat up on me (pure hypocrisy)

surfshiny
surfshiny
3 years ago

Laguna and Del Mar rivalry continues, who will win the “Gestapo Beach Town” title in 2022? Too close to call!

John Non John
John Non John
3 years ago

NonJohn likes smoking.

Craven Morehead
Craven Morehead
3 years ago

Awesome 👏

Picard Madeoff
Picard Madeoff
3 years ago

Awesome, BUT the truly tragic part of that story is she didn’t give him the rim job…opportunity lost.

tim_nelsen
tim_nelsen
3 years ago
Reply to  Picard Madeoff

“The dessert I had in Laguna, Dad.”

Picard Madeoff
Picard Madeoff
3 years ago

While I’ve seen the wax dropper set there, I see more cougars in Laguna and have cautioned my 23 yr old accordingly. He had a dinner with a Laguna cougar last week but refuses to provide any details beyond what he “had ” for dinner…

Brutus
Brutus
3 years ago
Reply to  Picard Madeoff

ah what was dessert ???

Waterproof Polo
Waterproof Polo
3 years ago

Seems a bit heavy handed.
Think Bondi was going to ban ciggies a few years back but something changed the council plans.

Capt Sensible
Capt Sensible
3 years ago

All this from the town that brought us the ” the brotherhood of endless love” and introduced international drug smuggling to surfing.

M.
M.
3 years ago

Ahhhh… America, the land of the free-ish…

Wotusay
Wotusay
3 years ago

I think smokers should all be encouraged to smoke more. Give them the cigs in fact. Easiest way to get rid of them.

Stick man
Stick man
3 years ago
notsurfingtoday
notsurfingtoday
3 years ago
Reply to  Stick man

Banger. No idea who they were. Thanks.

tim_nelsen
tim_nelsen
3 years ago
Reply to  Stick man

akin to Black Sabbath’s Paranoid

frank
frank
3 years ago

Pageant of the masters is an expensive try hard gimmick; to get people to engage with art? Yuck. Anybody can enjoy a Winslow Homer all by itself. Nobody needs this narcissistic and patronizing rich kid passion project bullshit, just put the money into good art programs for kids, and make museums free and accessible.

tim_nelsen
tim_nelsen
3 years ago

Wake me when the woke is over and the smoke has cleared…and the giant smoke detector has been put to bed…while I crawl with the roaches and search for the butts…

WeedMap is sponsoring a beach clean-up…coming soon to a beach near you!

Sean Connery
Sean Connery
3 years ago

In my town they have specific beaches where they allow you to walk your dog. This means that these specific beaches get over run with piss and shit. Sadly the main beach of choice is my local. Its fucked. So many people don’t pick up there dog shit and if you call them out on it they always say… I was going to grab on my way back or I forgot a bag. I think smoking is a dying art and doesn’t bother me. The real problem are these anti-shit picker-upper’s. They can go to hell for all I care.

Jrilla
Jrilla
3 years ago
Reply to  Sean Connery

I’ve been guilty of doing a shit in public but had forgotten my bag, so I blamed it on the dog.

Apeman
Apeman
3 years ago

Beach of the Free. Smoking gun allowed. Smoking cig not allowed. Smoking hot bod allowed. Smoking weed mandatory.

Stick man
Stick man
3 years ago
Reply to  Apeman

Weed the People!

Com Turren
Com Turren
3 years ago

well, they can’t outright ban The Riverside trash who invade their city every summer, but this is probably the next best thing.

Preston
Preston
3 years ago
Reply to  Com Turren

The 909 don’t really get down Laguna way much. The city has done a pretty good job of making public parking as difficult as possible. No parking, no riff riff. Simple.
HB on the other hand offers miles of beach parking, food concessions, even fire rings. Much more inviting.

Picard Madeoff
Picard Madeoff
3 years ago
Reply to  Preston

Ronnie G is smiling down upon the friendlies in HB

Ricky Spanish
Ricky Spanish
3 years ago

Seems like a great use of Lifeguard’s time- smoking police. Laguna is a stack of assholes.

Stick man
Stick man
3 years ago
Reply to  Ricky Spanish

Or a “pack” of 20 Class A finely rolled premium smooth flavored Assholes.


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