Love island!
2022 is careening to its official conclusion but not before piling another giddy shock on surf fans still reeling from the latest blast. Days ago, as you know, Lupita Nyong’o made her relationship with Selema Masekela “Instagram Official” by posting a series of cute outfit changes. The extremely talented Academy Award winning actress and the surf broadcaster had officially eclipsed the heat surrounding Gisele Bündchen and Kelly Slater thus making them surfing-adjacent’s most powerful couple.
Until, that is, days ago when it was revealed that Jody Sweetin had married Mescal Wasilewski.
Best known for playing lovable Stephanie Tanner on the hit television program Full House, Sweetin has long been considered an American darling. Wasilewski, of course, the brother of surf broadcaster Strider.
The two officially got married in the summer but surf fans are generally slow to this kind of news therefore the giddy shock.
Sweetin told People magazine, “We intertwine so well. He’s funny and smart, and he’s my biggest supporter. It’s really magical.”
Adorable.
With the marriage, Sweetin and Wasilewski’s status supersedes Nyong’o and Masekela’s simple dating and a new surfing-adjacent most powerful couple is crowned.
A dizzying game of intrigue.
With three, or such, days left in the year will there be any more surprises?
Griffin Colapinto’s uncle and Rebecca Romijn?
World Surf League chief strategy officer Dave Prodan and Heidi Klum?
I saw her at Disneyland, recently, and though she was with a boyfriend I feel Prodan could sweep her off feet.
More as the story develops.
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mezcal shook its furry head and unleashed on two froshmen on the Drive Down Mex trip…tequila saved my life! blotter brought out a day of splendor but weeks of recovery from the Monty’s Revenge. no worms here!
Definitely blacklisted by rip curl after the infamous mick fanning rant against chas (think he got him mixed up with derek), and the stunt at lemore backfired with egghead, mind you getting blocked by kelly probably means you’re doing something right.
But fuck, they could call up maurice or nev or even greg webber and talk shit about shaping.
Interesting that stories about the fat bastard from malibu seem to have dried up.
RIP. Andy Roy and Jason Jesse have some good stories of his time living in Santa Cruz.
Anything with Jay Adams, Perry Dane, I’ll read it.
Jay was cool…
He was a person you could not trust capable, of sociopathy who skated well. Edited for you.
Most of these guys don’t know who PD is or was.
That’s okay Troll but about 2 months ago Rielly made a plea for above-the-line article submissions from readers promising $100 for publication. I just figured that he didn’t cough up any kālā for you and you just proved me right.
help wanted? must ‘a missed it…will work for poki and what’s that local brew?
TMI Chuck, T M I
This is shit.
You left off “the.” This is THE shit.
ATTENTION BEACH GRIT COMMENTERS:
Greetings. As the acting VP of the Below the Line Writers Guild, I have been tasked by Gorilla to make this desperate plea.
As you all are too painfully aware, previous writers above the line here have – for all intents and purposes – deserted us, leaving us with a vacuous scatter of bad grammar and misspelled celebrity jerk-bait pablum.
Now, while we all wait for Dane’s Sushi to perfect his acid-tripping surf tales with some semi-coherent prose, we are asking, nay, begging, for our illustrious penis gallery to not make the same mistakes as TrollJerkOff did by submitting directly to Rielly. Bruddah is still all habut from the vicious edit mangling of his literary masterpiece. Troll’s second mistake was believing that Rielly would actually pay him the crispy Benjamin he was promised.
Believe it, the cellar is our domain and even Negs can’t smear us with enough of his hemorrhoid cream to dissuade us from our vested prerogative.
So sharpen your quills and fire away. There’s no subject matter that’s too thrilling or obscene. Hell, you can even stick it under any ole article, it don’t matter.
If you happen to get stymied by writer’s block just heed this sage advice I once gave to both Jen See and SurfAds :
First you start. Then get to the middle. When you reach the end, stop and submit.
Then just sit back with a frosty one and watch as you get raked over coals by trolls.
Try it today! It’s easy as pie and fun for the whole family!
Please anybody with a surf story. Doesn’t even need to have Perry Dane in it.
Where do we send the stories?
I wish I could write. My dad is a writer and has written a few books that have put very few sheckles in his pocket. Alast the the branch falls far from the tree. My laziness in my comments would be no different in my writing. So many talented people here though.
I don’t get why even beach grit surf stories are just “queen of surfing mason ho just released another video” and “vaguely famous almost pros just did a podcast”
Surely they have some actual contacts in the entire surf universe that they could interview.
Even though nick was a shameless ponce and longtom thought he was hemingway, when they left, they took some good posters with them.
What happened to elouras greatest export, bickerton? Wiggoly paddling style? Even ben marcus was fun in (very) small doses.
Bicko has become a rabid nationalist, probably changing diapers in his Conner O’Leary jersey.
I got one above the line and got absolutely bbq’d. Time of my life! I guess there were standards back then 😂
I got a mate who ran another surf site for a while. Didn’t go far but one thing that he did get every year was a WSL press pass on the back of it. All he had to do was write an article or 2 about the comp in Peniche or Hossegor and upload it. Free entry to the comp and access to the competitors area.
I live near Bells and might give it a try. If you are on Oahu you can try it first. Just get Chas or Derek to vouch for you. Worst case just pretend you are from Beach Grit and go interview interview Tina Cohen for us.
i repeated that “I dropped a deuce in the kelly pool” to a couple of ‘followers” er, ‘likers…” just in case my post was banned. well, that phrase was ‘reviewed’ for nearly 24 hours. “coitus interuptus it was…”
Chas the yenta
There’s still a couple of days left of the year – absolutely anything could happen in the “one up” stakes!! Kelly could still get married on an active volcano
I would toast that volcano activity!
“Strider! Mescal! …dinner’s ready!”
I love tequila. But not that much.
strider’s workin a hobart at the chart house…dishdawg!
“We’ll name him Mescal.”
Yea ~ Jane!
here’z a young ‘Razberry’,
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
gotta dig that ol’ Zephyr board too!
yow~za…
rw
Love sleuths never sleep.
Ultra Hard Sleuth Crap
Wait a second, didn’t Sterling Spencer’s sister not appear ad nauseam in that Harry and Megan Netflix documentary? Surely a bigger story!
His middle name should have been Lime (Mezcal Lime), goes with Slider Strawberry.