He ain't gonna win, so why go?
The byzantine selection process for the 2024 Paris Olympic Games, slammed as “colossal failure” after Filipe Toledo was selected for Team Brazil over Gabriel Medina and Italo Ferreira, has, again, come under scrutiny following Italo’s win at the Tahiti Pro earlier today.
In the starkest of contrast, one week ago Filipe Toledo, whose zero point heat total at Teahupoo and failure to score a meaningful wave in a heat against Kelly Slater and Nathan Hedge in 2022, is the stuff of legend, posted footage of an incomplete tube ride on a four-foot wave.
“Quick trip to Teahupoo with Team Brazil,” wrote an upbeat Toledo, failing to mention his grave disappointment at split town before the arrival of a ten-foot swell, which was enjoyed by teenagers and girls alike, as well as yesterday and today’s pits.
Toledo, you’ll remember, quit the tour earlier this year after the tour opener at Pipeline. After an embarrassing 1.77 heat total in perfect six-foot barrels, Toledo withdrew from the event citing an unspecified illness.
Soon after, he withdrew from the tour entirely.
Despite a third place in small surf at Teahupoo, Filipe Toledo remains unsuited to a wave whose code has now been accessed by half a dozen of the women surfers on tour.
On any sort of level, it makes considerable sense for Filipe Toledo to shuck his Olympic spot for Italo Ferreira, a switcharoo that benefits both men. Italo gets to defend his gold medal and Filipe is saved the mind-fuck of melting down in front of a worldwide audience.
He ain’t gonna win, so why go?
In an ironic twist, it was against Ferreira in 2015 where Toledo suffered the ignominy of becoming one of only two surfers in pro surfing history to paddle in from a heat without a wave being caught.
I see three options for Filipe.
He hands his ticket to Italo and is lauded for his patriotism, kindness etc. He charges. Or he goes, prays for no swell, and somehow, hopefully, slinks away from the Olympics with whatever is left of his reputation.
Tell me: you’re Filipe Toledo. What do you do?
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People keep talking about * in his world titles due to the Trestles format. He sucks in hollow lefts, but his world titles so far have nothing to do with the finals format. He was #1 in the rankings before Trestles. The one time he wasn’t, he lost the Trestles final to Medina.
Develop another mystery illness in early July and stand down is the obvious way to go. After Italos outstanding gung ho and fearless surfing to take the Tahiti title it would be simply unprincipled for Felipe to go. Which of course he never does at Teahupoo.
I really love to gloat watching others fail. Ive done it my whole life so seeing a cunt get there’s makes me rejoice.
I think we should sit back, prepare a beverage of choice and some popcorn and enjoy the watching. If you watch this and enjoy it as much as I did, I say Telipe Foledo is our guy.
Tchau e Obrigado.
https://youtu.be/C6cTe9tbp9…
hilarious these guys have more edge than most modern pro surfers, except K-Hole that is
If he paddles out and gets his face ripped off, all is forgiven. Chick’s dig scars! Keala just got married for crying out loud!….
Man they tried to give that final to John last night.
I’m waiting on Mr Curry to extrapolate on that thought, obvious as the sun setting.
As for Toledo, his insistence on keeping his olympic spot is puzzling. He had all the cover necessary to skip seeing as his stomach flu forced him off tour for the season. No one would have questioned him.
Then the bad clip from Tahiti. I can’t pronounce Teahupoo so I’m avoiding spelling it, sorry Kaipo. Let’s just call that left Tahiti if I dare pronounce that incorrectly thus infuriating Polynesians Pacific Rim wide. That was a really bad clip for most of us. For Felipe, unconsciable.
Surrender the spot to anyone in Brazil, save face, come back next year pining for Trestles. The obvious path, stay on it and in your lane. Chao, Miggy, Yago, Gabriel, Italo, even Jadsen or Adriano. Anyone but you Felipe.
Take the easy way out, we hear your stomach still gurgling.
does this mean we get so see another sick italo win tattoo? The one with the koala and the bell is so funny
Cheers for that, clystal crear.
More importantly what’s with Italo ripping off Gabby’s signature spray.
Also ripping off his stache/goatee
So who has called for him to relinquish his position? I read twice and couldn’t find it.
xox
Once was enough for me.
In the live stream comments!
I want written affidavits!
Xox
By your rationale then let’s also swap out Lucca Mesinas for Miguel Tudela and possibly also Ethan Ewing for Ryan Callinan or Nathan Hedge?
No need to swap
Ethan if your aus he fucking charges
Mate Ethan has a solid dig no comparing him to Toled0.0
Hey, what happened last year to Ethan? Broke his back, at Lowers two weeks later, no surgery or lengthy recovery?
Why do Aussies suffer mystery ailments never explained? Wrights come to mind. How do you recover from a broken back on a benign wave to challenge at the mushy final?
I see Ethan I see a silky smooth guy with a similar critique as Connor. One turn charlie, cutback to fin slip. Sure, he rips in other aspects but has no air game. Hig floor, appealing, no ceiling.
But man Aus loves the guy. Derek drools over him. He seems like younger Ace Buchan to me. Where are the Aussie rippers? R Cal? Is there a Dane Reynolds hiding? Does San Clemente breed elites while the country of Oz gives us new versions of Drew Courtney and Tom Whitaker?
Elites like Andino and Young.😄😄
The key thing that Ethan has that is unmatched is his effortless style, which is also paired with great power and flow. Simple-sounding enough but to put them all together the way he does is sublime. Comparing him to Drew Courtney or Tom Whitaker is so off the mark. He does have some progression too, but LOB probably has more..
He got cleaned-up by a near pensioner
Cleaned up? Slater won by a bees dick after being gifted that high 4 by the judges.
No reference to these ‘calls’? So just your opinion then.
Hope he goes I don’t want the brazzos winning gold , fark that.
Hahaha, why not?? Who do you want to see with gold?
Duh guess what happens if Toledo gives up his spor?
It goes to Yago Dora.
Italo didn’t compete at the world surfing games (and is therefore ineligible) nor did he finish high enough on the CT last year.
Same goes if Chianca remains injured, his spot goes to Dora.
Ok? Yago also charges harder Teahupoo harder than Felipe and would be a better fit. The fact that basically all brazzos on tour are more capable at this spot than Felipe kinda makes an even better point that he should give his spot up
Yago would go
Yago would be nice, too.
he does whatever he feels like. and that’s fine. he’s a 2x world champ. you dont luck into that sorta thing. wsl for all us laptop watchers is simply entertainment. as Steve PeZman so well said, ‘ surfing is the toy department of human affairs’ . bg at best helped get the most entertaining surfer in the world, on small to medium size surf , off the tour for us not to be entertained by this year.
continued bashing of fill does what exactly? he’s not the story of the Tahiti pro. incredible surfing, much of it by his countrymen, is.
Real surf fans would like to continue to see world champs who can do it all. This current format let one slip through who is terrible in large critical surf. Filipe has two asterisk titles to those of us who dislike this format. Outside of the wsl Filipe is a soft character. He can’t take the ribbing and he won’t sack up. So fuck him. I hope he gets another 0.0 in pumping surf in the Olympics so we can watch him convince himself he charges again. At this point filipe couldn’t even make finals day on the women’s draw if the waves are real at teahupoo. There are working class hero’s all over the world who would smoke Filipe in any heavy slab. This is not world champ material. It shouldn’t be possible to paddle out into any surf with a world champ and not be blown away by their performance. In heavy critical surf Filipe fails to perform time and time again
Felipe wouldn’t even make it out of the elimination round of the women’s, going by the performances from this year’s comp.
Agree with most points, but his world titles so far have nothing to do with the finals format. He was #1 in the rankings before Trestles. The one time he wasn’t #1 coming to Trestles, he lost the Trestles final to Medina.
Agreed but the years he won were terrible swell years for the events and it’s largely due to format. The tour is bloated and the cut format just highlights how much better it would work with fewer surfers to allow the events to only run in good waves because less time is required to finish the event. In some ways this stuff is out of our hands but there is no denying that Filipe isn’t a complete surfer and the goal of the format should be to highlight who the best of the best is in all conditions. The fact that Filipe can win it at all without ever having won an event in heavy surf is problematic and speaks to the failures of the format
I see what you mean. I thought that by “format” you meant the Trestles final.
trestles final is terrible but only part of the problem
Fucken where am I swellnut! Where’s the Ryan story, or the sharks dining on the young.
Very disappointed
What’s the Ryan story?
His a pro surfer so he will do exactly what his told to do by the people who pay him.
I suggest that will be turn up pass go and collect $200 and make sure you get several photos of yourself in the Olympic jersey.
He has a big extended family to feed
Plus the contest window, if memory serves me right, is super small. He might get lucky and get to compete in much more favourable conditions than we’ve seen the last couple of days. Shit, he might win gold if it goes small-ish and onshore. Wouldn’t that be poetic?
Dodgy oysters are a real thing
And it’s not Pippy’s fault that after eating one tonight he’ll be medically forced to pull out of the Olympics due to the ongoing mental anguish from another bout of mild food poisoning
It’s safer to eat dodgy oysters with your bumhole. Makes for a randy libido too!
xox
Wait whut you put oysters in your ass? 😳
Doesn’t everyone?
Helps with the taste I imagine
No, but I would!
Xox
Butt shuck
ya give the slot to Italo coz pride in nation of birth, brazzo storm etc, and escape total embarrassment by seeming to be a good cunt.
6 to 10 foot. Lol kook.
4 to 6
6 to 8
8 to 10
10 to 12
12 to 15
Etc until 30 then it’s simply 30+
Been this way for ever , yep “6 to 10” total kook call.
I agree but funnily enough there were 6 footers and there were 10 footers.
So it stays 6ft with the odd bomb.
Look, normally I’d agree, but seeing as longtom (rip) still has a place in my heart, I’m going with his current incarnation.
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
What sort of fuckwittery downvotes this? Don’t be flippant wit the gold
Those long period swells, four to six, four to six, then a ten footer. Ergo, six to ten.
Did somebody let that Santa Cruz cunt SUP author back in the comment section?
Show me a wave that was ten foot yesterday. Add your self. To the kook list.
JJF grinder vs Medina
I was just commenting on your general fuckwittery, cunt.
You. Are . A. Kook.
Says the pathetic cunt that took 3 comments to to string together a fail of a comeback.
I never said it was 10ft. I just said you were a cunt, which is a realistic assessment.
Love me a sup on a Santa Cruz.
10foot? Add yourself to the list of kooks.