Surfer (pictured) unwashed and generally gross.
Surfer (pictured) unwashed and generally gross.

San Francisco billionaire locked in epic battle to keep “unwashed and generally gross” surfers off beach

Let them surf cake.

California, home to nearly 40 million souls, has long embraced open beach access to all. It is generally illegal to block access to those wishing to come build sandcastles or lovingly splash in the sometimes temperate waters. The state’s Coastal Commission has laws and whatnot on the books declaring such but that has not stopped the ultra-wealthy from trying.

Now, usually this business occurs in Malibu where multi-million dollar homes front the iconic sands and certain of their owners try to build fences, and such, to keep interlopers out. Up San Francisco way, though, as case has rolled all the way up to the United Supreme Court and back down again with no resolution thus far.

It features the very handsome Indian-American venture capitalist Vinod Khosla, his 32 million dollar estate and Martins Beach, just south of Half Moon Bay. The co-founder of Sun Microsystems purchased the property in 2008 and immediately built a fence blocking beach access to surfers, likely imagining them unwashed and generally gross. The Surfrider Foundation immediately sued and the two parties fought through the legal system to Washington D.C. where the SCOTUS refused to hear such a squabble and let the lower ruling stand, which favored Surfrider.

Khosla, unsatisfied, has asked the judge to vacate that decision but the judge has refused thereby, I think, reopening the whole business and keeping surfers out until all appeals etc. are finished.

Or maybe I’m reading it wrong.

In any case, if you had a oceanfront castle would you try to block your fellow surfer from paddling?

The BeachGrit way.

More as the story develops.

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Cuntry Singer
Cuntry Singer
2 years ago

https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

Im offended.

Maybe they arent surfers. They are good folk, from the beaches of San Diego, Malibu, all the way to the Golden Gate Bridge that are seeking to make the U$A great again.

Cant recognize they arent surfers? Disgraceful. These are multinational friends trying to find refuge.

Mostly young men of military age, note very few children and woman.

Same type of men built the story of 9/11 thats a rich and dynamic part of the story Americana. Those too were just men looking for purpose. They couldnt even fly planes and look at what they did. Remarkable.

Very shameful this rich person acts so smug assuming it’s “surfers”, ewww. These are people looking for something greater.

seppocunt
seppocunt
2 years ago

Seems like a cunt of epic proportions. Maybe a dirty, unwashed surfer banged his wife back in the day.

Snowbored
Snowbored
2 years ago

Who is Martin? What about him? Is he (they/them)still allowed?

Tomas' silky smooth arms
Tomas' silky smooth arms
2 years ago

Chas, how do you run in long pants, a hindrance?

Nikola
Nikola
2 years ago

He is free to go back home and take a bath in the Ganges River along with couple million of his fellow Indians. No Cali surfers will bother him there.

JohnsKnees
JohnsKnees
2 years ago

I know youve been in Nashville where they are a bit behind the times but I don’t think they are 4 years late. This story came out in 2020

https://www.santacruzsentin…

JohnsKnees
JohnsKnees
2 years ago
Reply to  JohnsKnees

Update, it goes back as far at 2014.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk…

Kama'aina
Kama'aina
2 years ago

My beach, go home.

Sean Connery
Sean Connery
2 years ago

Even if I had the money I wouldn’t buy a castle on the beach. Full time cleaners always hovering around the house, gardeners blowing leaves all day, something always needing fixings, annoying stuck up neighbors. Fuck that. Just give me a shack at an undisclosed beach break or point as far away from people like Khosla as humanely possible and I will be a happy man.

No Feelings
No Feelings
2 years ago

The irony of an Indian IT guy calling surfers “unwashed and gross” in the North American capital of the unwashed and gross including junkies and drunks living in the street and shitting on the sidewalk, software engineers, hippie vegans who don’t believe in bathing, and Boomers with grey dreadlocks who think patchouli covers up their odor, is truly amazing. 🤣

It’s like, has he ever left his house except by helicopter?

Barrelled
Barrelled
2 years ago
Reply to  No Feelings

You do realize Chad made that up don’t you? Read it again carefully.

Dim Sim
Dim Sim
2 years ago

Me? I would take joy in loosing rounds from a rifle and innocently declaring that they were nothing other than marine rabbits. Nobody and especially the departments of sticks, leaves and municipal rubbish has any sympathy for rabbits. That’s be a good plot for a film I think? Innocent surfers’ skulls cracked open in the raging surf by the bullets of unknown assailants on land. Just add tits. Instant hit.

ValiantScorn
ValiantScorn
2 years ago
Reply to  Dim Sim

tits, and cocaine*

Dim Sim
Dim Sim
2 years ago
Reply to  ValiantScorn

Yes, most definitely. All I need is some dickhead to help me with the screenplay.

Low wide stinkbug stance
Low wide stinkbug stance
2 years ago
Reply to  Dim Sim

Didn’t chas already publish that?

Dim Sim
Dim Sim
2 years ago

Dunno. Haven’t yet got to the point of buying any of his books.

Picard Madeoff
Picard Madeoff
2 years ago
Reply to  ValiantScorn

Everything goes better with cocaine

Piskian
Piskian
2 years ago
Reply to  Dim Sim

Filmed at my local.
https://youtu.be/w-ALnM-R5C…
Electrified sharknets surrounding the break works for me.

Dim Sim
Dim Sim
2 years ago
Reply to  Piskian

That was excellent, thanks.

ValiantScorn
ValiantScorn
2 years ago

Those rabid comanche can wait on that hill all they want. They will still die. We will still honor their war song, in death.

c4
c4
2 years ago

I think he pussed out and flew home, so he’s probably tucked in bed next to his stuffed ELO doll.

Rocks local
Rocks local
2 years ago

Figuring out what court orders mean from newspaper summaries is like trying to read Mandarin using the Oxford English Dictionary. Also, what a ridiculous obsession to have as the first line of your obit.

Wave Wizard
Wave Wizard
2 years ago

Used to surf there with my dad. Good to see a rich cunt bought it and is keeping everyone out.

Abscessed Llama
Abscessed Llama
2 years ago
Reply to  Wave Wizard

Descent wave?

Occ Topus
Occ Topus
2 years ago

No.
It’s on a beautiful stretch of coastline, however.

Wave Wizard
Wave Wizard
2 years ago

Pretty shit but a lovely and ideal location.


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