A new angle on the British Wavegarden tank. Better, worse, than you might imagine.
After eight months of cold labour in the English city of Bristol, one of the better cities in a country populated by people with fish smell on their breath, hideous raven hair and guinea pig faces, we have The Wave.
Last year’s wetsuit film was A New Jersey Wetsuit Fairytale starring slab-hunter Tommy Ihnken surfing around Asbury Park and cut to covers of Springsteen songs.
The conceit of this year’s film is time travel.
To wit, what if a surfer from the future time travelled back to Raglan in 1984 with 2019’s best wetsuits?
What would it mean thirty-five years on?
Would we be wearing wetsuits with wings? Purple wetsuits? Invisible wetsuits?
The film features suits from Billabong, O’Neill, Rip Curl, Feral, Quiksilver, Vissla and Xcel whose donations made this film possible. It’s a measure, a reflection, I think, of a company’s connection to surfing when they cut generous cheques to make little culture bites that may not bounce straight back onto the bottom line but do add to the game, as a whole.
A fascinating study of a man with everything who still wonders why…
“How did I get here?” wondered eighties band Talking Heads.
Watching this new episode of the WSL’s excellent Sound Waves series, which features Kelly Slater at the Freshwater Pro, his backyard pool, you get the feeling that it don’t matter if a man has a late-model Cadillac, flawlessly tailored ice-cream silk suits and a Kewpie Doll wife with a reddish tan and platinum hair, he will always be beset by feelings of inferiority, anxiety, confusion.
To wit, Kelly Slater.
Eleven titles. Millions of shekels. Sweet girl.
Owns a piece of the world’s most perfect wave.
And, yet, the terror of losing aches his gullet.
It’s a few hours to Portugal, so let’s watch the behind-the-scenes machinations of the greatest surfer ever dealing with the internal torment of a career in its twilight.
"Want a joint man from the future?"
Coming soon: Relatively funny time-travel wetsuit comedy, “Once Upon a Time In New Zealand!”
This is a short novelty film, starring dynamic midget Mason Ho, thirty years old from Sunset Beach and Ho family scion, and made in two parts.
Nine days ago, Mason was filmed, along with his pal Sheldon Paishon, surfing a mock heat at a greasy rock-break which, according to director Rory Pringle, they’d never surfed before.
“Lots of Pohaku (rocks), thats why its called the Pohaku Division,” writes Rory.
In the second half we see Mason and his Uncle Derek, who was the world champion in 1993, beating even Kelly Slater at his early peak, whipping up a lil magic at Velzyland, a locals-only sorta joint east of Sunset.
“Mason’s truly one if my favorite surfers to watch,” says Kelly Slater. “You never know what he’s gonna do. He throws style points back to his influences and elders, and throws down maneuvers lots of new school guys can’t pull. And he surfs those weird waves nobody else does, which is probably my favorite thing about him.”