"This is Kelly's day!"
In the latest episode Lost Tapes, the 11-part series that follows the travails of Kelly Slater on his 2019 tour run, we are transported to French Polynesia where the Tahiti Pro is taking place.
Slater, who is forty-seven, underperforms at the event he has won five times, causing the Champ a surprisingly deep sorrow.
The post-heat scene back at his ocean-front villa where he sits with Chinese girlfriend Kalani Miller and pours over the rides of his opponent Jack Freestone, bitterly lambasting the judges for a nine given to Freestone where “the wave spits and he’s on the shoulder”, is better, I think, than anything in the much-vaunted Make or Break series for Apple+.
His journey is made complete, however, when the tour’s surfers leave the archipelago the day before a clean eight-to-ten-foot swell hits.
Needing to shoot a campaign advertisement for his Outerknown high-waisted “dad jeans” the lineup is empty but for local shredder Kauli Vaast, whom you’ll remember went over the falls with a photographer on a monster day just last week.
“This is Kelly’s day,” says OG Tahitian surf-stud Raimana Van Bastolaer, who was once described by Cindy Crawford as “walking viagra”.
And, so it is.