Revealed: Noa Deane still surfs!
It's a Christmas miracle two months early!
I know that you are rude and caustic and asshole (my daughter uses “asshole” as an adjective and it is so much more brilliant. “Look at that asshole car…” “That man is asshole…” etc.) but I love Noa Deane and was very sad when he stopped surfing. Oh, I didn’t know (officially) that he stopped but assumed since he did not appear to be surfing anywhere anymore. But guess what assuming makes? It makes me asshole and you asshole.
And Noa Deane still surfs!
I have no idea how old he is but trust there is some milage left on those tires and would like him to rip some shitties (what does that mean?) before he Danes out because… I like the boy. I like his girly face. I like his weight issues. I like his guitar riffs and I like his spunk (not that spunk either and stop being asshole). I’ve liked him ever since he stepped onto Turtle Bay’s embarrassingly awful stage and said, “Fuck the WSL!”
But mostly I like his surfing. I really really do and he just released a banger.
Should we watch?
DON’T BE ASSHOLE!