Jay Davies, exceptional talent out of Western
Australia, put on a show during the Marg River Pro. He cut down WSL
favorites. He raged through barrels. He made people believe that a
very strong man can surf very well. Watch, enjoy and then get
thyself to a gym because only the strong survive. And only the good
die young.
History shall decide for sure but I say Ryan
Miller, from New Jersey, wears the crown.
The surf photography game is cruel and
unrelenting. For every Clark Little earning millions dipping a
camera into Waimea’s famed shorebreak there are thousands of
also-rans, crying into their soup.
In such a crowded field, even the smallest advantage can mean
the difference between gallery shows and the back pages of
Surfer (where the SUP practice machine ads dwell). It
helps to have rich parents, in order to horde the latest REDs or
Canons.
It also helps to be beautiful. Clark, of course, is with a
million dollar Hurley smile but also Morgan Maasen with nipples so
large, so brown, that to expose them in front of hungry children
would be considered quite cruel. And Pete Taras hair so thick, eyes
so piercing, it remains a wonder that he has remained off the cover
of GQ (Greek addition) for so long.
But there is one who rises above all. The sexiest surf
photographer ever? History shall decide for sure but I say Ryan
Miller, from New Jersey, is the front-runner.
He is handsome, to begin with, but pairs his handsome with a
leopard print bikini bottom that is just wow. His body fits into it
like a weisswurst fits into its casing. He surfs it, he lounges it,
he shoots in it and it can all be seen on his Instagram feed
@badboyryry_
Where did it come from? Ryan says, “The bikini I picked up at
Wal Mart when I was a teenager. I keep with me at all times to
remember to keep it light and just have a good time. Too many sad
fucks whining at these dream locations. I never want to be that
guy.”
And the Instagram feed? By far the best in the game. What about
it? “Instagram feed…” he says “..is what it is because I’m a pretty
shit photographer. If I just posted surf photos and everyone got to
see all my work then people would know I was a phony. It is really
just another layer of the onion. You can see my surf photos
elsewhere. On Instagram I just want to make myself smile.”
And is it ever a sexy smile. Almost like dear Mona Lisa’s.
Owen's perfect heat, Julian's ten-pointer and the
dull thud of Dane and Kelly landing back on earth…
The pro game is a tough play. One minute you’re
sloshing around in the channel gazing at Strider’s steroidal tits,
talking about your heat win, the next tears are bubbling in your
eyes, hazing everything like a cotton film.
Dane Reynolds, out, to Taj Burrow in round five, but not without
catching a couple of grey shacks.
And, Kelly Slater, to Italo Ferreira, for the second time this
year, but this time at a wave he’s been throwing apart for 30
years. You could see the dry swallows squeezing down Kelly’s neck
as he composed for his post-heat interview.
But, we got new heroes! Owen Wright surfed a perfect heat, the
seventh in history. “I never thought I’d get 20 points in my life,”
said Owen, his nostrils widening.
Watch here.
And here’s Kelly talking about it.
Julian Wilson went pretty nuts, too. He scored 19.43 in round
four against Kelly and Taj.
And how about Joel? Remember him? Maybe 20th or something on the
ratings this year. Watch him whale on this bomb. Ten!
Want some highlights?
WSL Perfect Heat Totals:
2015: Owen Wright (AUS) – Fiji Pro
2013: Joel Parkinson (AUS) – Oakley Pro
Bali
2013: Kelly Slater (USA) – Volcom Fiji Pro
2011: Jeremy Flores (FRA) – Billabong Pro
Tahiti
2008: Joel Parkinson (AUS) – Billabong Pipe
Masters
2005: Kelly Slater (USA) – Billabong Pro
Tahiti
1996: Shane Beschen (USA) – Billabong Pro Gold
Coast*
So he can make Rory Parker's famous lychee-infused
pulled pork!
Lychee season is in full swing on Kauai these
days. Discarded husks and pits litter the streets of
Kapaa, burn-out chronic wastes of air peddle bags of purloined
fruit on the side of every road.
But, damn, are these things tasty.
Sweet, juicy, with just a tiny hint of tart. You can only stuff
so many down your gullet before you get sick of them though, so
when your tree starts dumping 100 pounds of the little red treats
you need to find other ways to make them a meal.
My favorite thing to do with them is make pulled pork. You’d
expect the lychee to dissolve and flavor the meat, what happens
instead is the pork infuses the fruit, leaving you with hot sweet
salty savory little pork nuggets, a perfect companion to a greasy
pig feast.
Rory’s Hawaiexicasian pulled pork with swine infused
lychee
Ingredients:
4 lbs pork shoulder or butt
12 or more fresh lychee- pitted and halved
2 small sweet onions
5 garlic cloves
2 Tbsp alaea salt
1 Tbsp black pepper
1/2 tsp cumin
1 large Jalapeno
1 Tbsp chopped ginger
¼ cup rice vinegar
2 Tbsp honey
2 Tbsp spicy Chinese mustard powder (mix with a little water to
form a paste.)
2 Tbsp brown sugar
3 Tbsp sesame oil
Halve and quarter onions, put on bottom of pot. Peel garlic,
slice three cloves lengthwise. Using paring knife, stab pork and
insert garlic, put on top of onions. Slather pork in mustard paste,
then cover pork with lychee. Don’t allow lychee to fall into
bottom of cooker.
In one bowl, combine:
1 Tbsp Alaea salt (can substitute kosher salt)
1 Tbsp pepper
1/2 tsp cumin
1 Large jalapeño – sliced (more if you want it spicier)
2 cloves chopped garlic
1 Tbsp diced ginger
In another bowl combine:
¼ cup rice vinegar
3 Tbsp sesame oil
2 Tbsp honey
2 Tbsp brown sugar
Whisk ingredients of bowl #2 together, then pour over bowl #1
and stir together.
Pour over slowly over meat, taking care that the lychee stay
don’t fall into bottom of cooker.
Then sprinkle with one more tablespoon of alaea salt
Two teenagers lose limbs in separate attacks, same
beach…
What are the odds? Two teens, bodyboarding,
near Ocean Crest Pier in North Carolina, both attacked by a shark,
or sharks, in less than two hours.
CNN reports, “A teenage girl lost her left arm and left leg in
an attack around 4:15 p.m. EDT. Less than 90 minutes later, as
responders were still tending to her, a teenage boy was then
attacked.”
‘His arm was clean off,’ said witness Jason Hunter, who spoke
with CNN affiliate WWAY.
“Both were airlifted to New Hanover Regional Medical Center in
Wilmington. Their conditions were not immediately known. Mayor
Betty Wallace told CNN that shark attacks are so rare in Oak Island
– a southerly facing beach town on the state’s southern most
coast – that she couldn’t remember one ever occurring before
today. ‘Common sense would tell you it’s the same shark,’ she
said.
“Both attacks occurred at high tide in the vicinity of Ocean
Crest Pier, a popular destination among beach goers. ‘At the pier
this time of year I’m sure the beach was packed,’ said Wallace.