Blood Feud: What Youth vs Captions!

“Surf captions are officially dead!” and “Fuck a caption!”

Bold opinion is such a rare commodity in our world of “safe spaces” “micro-aggressions” and “trigger warnings.”

Who knew that one day cartoonists would be gunned down in their offices and other cartoonists would defend the killings as the result of ‘em “punching down”?

We’ve become so pompous and solemn and dull, don’t you think? College students are so terrified of confronting ideas and so unable to cope with even literary classics, The Great Gatsby now comes with a warning: (Trigger: suicide, domestic abuse and graphic violence).

Everyone else is finding hunks of racism, sexism, homophobia and Islamophobia (but curiously not the more virulent anti-semitism) and white privilege in their corn flakes each morning.

And surfing magazines, of which I’ve been a part of, one way or the other, for longer than I’d ever admit, take this piety to new levels. Which makes ’em ripe for satire and for criticism.

So I always light up a little when I see, read, someone having a bit of a swing at the status quo.

What Youth, the magazine started five years ago by most of the key players of Surfing magazine and the filmmaker Kai Neville, gave it to Surfer and Surfing magazines yesterday, on their crummy choice of photos. To Surfer, What Youth‘s editor Travis Ferré wrote:

“Please, we all deserve better from you. Surfers, editors, photographers, followers. This is our lives and just because you’re trying to appease a mil worth of followers, remember when you post something like this you make us all look like kooks. So please, stop it. Sincerely, What Youth.”

Today, What Youth is going after captions, the usually meaningless trope that goes under photos in those spreads.

“Surf photo captions are officially dead. Let’s reinvent them together. Surf photo captions suck because they’re easy to write instead of great to read. They’re designed for the supplier instead of the consumer. And it’s time to fix them. How can we redesign the surf photo caption? What could improve or replace it?”

It’s a good question. I haven’t seen a print mag in a while, but one relatively prestigious title I did find, ran the following captions:

“All smiles inside the world’s deadliest wave. Teahupoo.”

“Hard to believe something so beautiful could be so deadly. Teahupoo.”

One What Youth follower had barely read the Instagram screed before he started waving his pitchfork.

“WY is punk rock as fuck. Fuck a caption, don’t conform.”

My philosophy at Stab, although not always followed to the letter, as some days the lethargy would claw at my fingers and refuse any industry, was that any significant photo had to feature a quote from the surfer and the photographer.

For one week out of every six-week production cycle, I’d sit there and call both participants, chasing top 10 surfers around the world for a three-minute interview. More than once, Joel or Kelly or whomever would hear the silence at my end and ask, “Is that all you want?”

Did anyone care? Did anyone read? Who knows?

Maybe captions are unnecessary. At least they are according to this guy:

“Honestly, captions don’t matter that much, as long as it says who the surfer is, and who took the picture, and maybe where their surfing if it’s not like a secret spot. The main thing is the picture…”

And you? Do you care?

 

0 0 votes
Article Rating
Subscribe
Notify of
guest
25 Comments
Newest
Oldest Most Voted
capn birdseye
capn birdseye
10 years ago

I read them Derek, I read them.

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
10 years ago

I’m the man with the Hebrew name who surfs like a Brazzo. No fuckin strawberry.

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
10 years ago

I feel I need to clear this up so it is never misinterpreted by retarded historians. I am not a ranga. I am Yadin Nicol.

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
10 years ago

BACK DEN 105 mark oblow, palolo valley ramp, oahu circa 1989. this was right when i decided i couldn’t type in capital letters and i started to blow the toddler aged quik team in the bushes next to the ramp. whether they surf or skate i blow them…. rieder, anderson, gillette. it all feels good. shot on kodak disposable camera. – Mark Oblow

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
10 years ago

what youth need to be taken down a peg. they’re really really shit. i also think ‘zines’ are shit in general (WY definitely go for that flavor)… does that make me a tasteless and soulless neanderthal?

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
10 years ago

*0 Readers.

Tom House
Tom House
10 years ago

Typically, as a magazine, when you’ve got a rock solid grasp of your own shit, you don’t go asking readers for ideas about how to make a goddamn magazine.

muff
muff
10 years ago

What a bunch of fucking pussies

yep
yep
10 years ago

WY like to tick all the boxes. Old legends, groms, rippers, skating, and themselves are all well covered, so much in fact that it makes me ill.

Fahking Haole
Fahking Haole
10 years ago

Hawaiian Island chain nestled in lunar eclipse. Photo by unknown.

toofattosurf
toofattosurf
10 years ago
Reply to  Fahking Haole

fat as fuck all tat’d samurai wannabe sumo wrestler. selfie.

Suss Oldman
Suss Oldman
10 years ago

Blood Feud is starting to read like Drunk Rant. “of which I’ve been a part of”???

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
10 years ago

“WY is punk rock as fuck. Fuck a caption, don’t conform.” – yes let’s conform to not having a caption!

Trogan Fan
Trogan Fan
10 years ago

Good shots speak for themselves.

A$AP Honky
A$AP Honky
10 years ago

whats this instant-gram thing? Is it the new my-space for surfers?

Nick Carroll
Nick Carroll
10 years ago

Yeah I have a suggestion, learn to write.

longtom
longtom
10 years ago

comes across more as a desperate cry for attention rather than a swing at the status quo. Maybe Daddy didn’t hug them enough as kiddies?

longtom
longtom
10 years ago

Dell, you’ve got grand skill at the caption…..vital part of the short game.

Free Assange.

Sampson
Sampson
10 years ago

Nobody said you had to have captions.. I mean, maybe someone did, but it’s your thing, do it however you want.

velobwoy
velobwoy
10 years ago

My brother and I could have like entire conversations of mid-70’s Surfermag captions. “Emotional peaks and points of involvement” and so forth… Who wrote those things? Pezman? Weed?

Horatio Algae
Horatio Algae
10 years ago

Yeah punk rock! Fuck a caption! Let’s get rid of headings while we’re at it. And names too. Fuck names, describing things. Formatting, grammar, language, fuck ’em all, so old and uncool, surfing deserves better, let’s just communicate in grunts and morse code and by reading each other’s tattoos. Punk rock!! Hey, does my hair look okay? – the what youth team


25
0
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
()
x