Pure sunshine!
Pure sunshine! | Photo: Brian Bielmann/brianbielmann.com

Just in: Mason Ho to surf Bells!

The one and only Mason Ho and also Dusty Payne. But Mason Ho!

Do you love that Rip Curl has an event if only because Mason Ho gets to wildcard? Thank you Claw Warbrick for starting your wetsuit brand in an austere land and thank you Jack Freestone! It is due his injury, or maybe Filipe Toledo’s, that Mason gets to do post heat interviews on the bleak sands of Torquay, Australia. Have you ever been there? Have you ever scanned the depressing bluffs with your sad eyes and felt even more sadness actually seep deeper into your very soul? Mason Ho is exactly the sunshine Victoria needs!

Dusty Payne is surfing too. #shrug.

But Mason! Mason Ho! Read his hilarious 10 worst here and laugh and put him on your Fantasy Surf team straight away. How did you do after Snapper by the way? I did poorly. Does it mean I don’t know professional surfing? Probably.

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Mr. Sparkle
Mr. Sparkle
10 years ago

more interviews pls

Thruster_Truster
Thruster_Truster
10 years ago

WSL should consider extra points for exciting post heat interviews! Until then Mason is staying off my fantasy team

Trogan Fan
Trogan Fan
10 years ago

I notice that neither Coco nor Mason have gotten any taller in the years since that photo was taken. They are very short.

longtom
longtom
10 years ago

You didn’t jump on the Brother bandwagon Chas?

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
10 years ago
Reply to  longtom

I had brother on my team but no. I didn’t. Though he has the best laugh in professional surfing don’t you think?

Audit In Progress
Audit In Progress
10 years ago

I wanna know more about the stories behind Dusty’s “bad attitude” as per Chas’ book.

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
10 years ago

“worst attitude ever” wasn’t that the quote? – or maybe that was about AI, I must read it again I suppose!

Charlie Conway
Charlie Conway
10 years ago

I want the low down on what actually happened to Freestone! Every website has posted the same quote, “he suffered a serious leg injury”.
What the fuck happened??? Did eat shit surfing? Did he get hammered celebrating Wilko’s win and jump in to a pool from a 12’th story hotel room???

Audit In Progress
Audit In Progress
10 years ago
Reply to  Charlie Conway

Obligatory “it was probably an Alana sex injury” comment.

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
10 years ago

Too quick for me.

Charlie Conway
Charlie Conway
10 years ago

I was gonna include something along those lines but it seemed too obvious, cheap and played out.

Audit In Progress
Audit In Progress
10 years ago
Reply to  Charlie Conway

Too “Stab.”

Shredopotamus
Shredopotamus
10 years ago

Every heat Mason makes is a little “whipped cream bonus” for the people.

david fffff
david fffff
10 years ago

I asked Dusty Payne to lower my casket when I die so he can let me down one last time

bojangles
bojangles
10 years ago
Reply to  david fffff

The nice thing about Stab hiding comments is that almost no one will know you are recycling.

david fffff
david fffff
10 years ago
Reply to  bojangles

Come on now, you don’t think Bill Cosby has a different set for every town he visits?

Same bag of pills for everyones drinks.

NEGATRON
NEGATRON
10 years ago
Reply to  david fffff

You and Bill, It’s a tight race on who stooped the lowest…

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
10 years ago
Reply to  david fffff

You know when Derek gives you up votes but you don’t really think he read the comment…. It’s just like a bit of an encouragement or thank you for commenting on BeachGrit token. That’s how you should feel about my up vote on this one. It was genius the first time though.

The Bitchy Crab
The Bitchy Crab
10 years ago

…oh you cynic! But I am thrilled to see comments…

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
10 years ago

I would do exactly the same thing. It’s okay.

Dahaoleformerlyknownasbi0008
Dahaoleformerlyknownasbi0008
10 years ago

What are you on about? You hand out up votes to just about anyone who has a finger to poke at the keyboard. For a minute I thought we had something special but I learned, I learned about you and your whorish up votes.

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
10 years ago

You’re absolutely correct but an up vote whore would insinuate I’m gaining something from my promiscuity. That’s Derek’s job. I’m merely a lowly slut or junkie. When someone either says something insightful or has an argument that deteriorates to “eat my faeces” or “I fucked your mum” I feel obliged to up vote because it brings me so much joy watching the futility of their keyboard rage.

Dahaoleformerlyknownasbi0008
Dahaoleformerlyknownasbi0008
10 years ago

You are clearly way too fucking happy. Get some hate in your life will ya?

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
10 years ago

You’re clearly not familiar with my work in connection with Brazilians.

Dahaoleformerlyknownasbi0008
Dahaoleformerlyknownasbi0008
10 years ago

I am, and I’m a fan. But I also see you regularly up voting mutts like Toofat and Huff(I know he’s not actually Brasilian but I like to pretend he is. Helps maintain my unrealistically high characterization of you lot) and the authenticity of your hatred is called into question. And where’s my up vote for that last comment?!

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
10 years ago

toofattosurf AKA Sandy is a nice guy. He is a man with no poo-stance stuck behind enemy lines in Brazil. He keeps me under control when my comments get too xenophobic. He is like a PR man on my anti poo stance campaign. Huff is one of my favorite characters because he has remained in character despite so much ridicule. He actually started off with quite a strong following before becoming a punching bag for Cavvy. He doesn’t really fight back anymore which is sad.

Lemmy
Lemmy
10 years ago

just because you did poorly at snapper on FS, doesnt mean you dont know pro surfing. It means the judging is fucked!

Karl Von Fanningstadt
Karl Von Fanningstadt
10 years ago

Things I am excited to witness during Bells:
-Dusty’s 5.33 heat score in Round 2
-Rory’s continued content dry spell

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
10 years ago

Rory’s dry spell? What about mine? Like a desert! But I’ve got some clouds on my artistic horizon!

nyc surfing golden boy
nyc surfing golden boy
10 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

chas, do you have another job outside of this? if not, keep fucking writing

Audit In Progress
Audit In Progress
10 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

How about surfing models/football players?
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/…

Tom Brady rides a tri-fin popout longboard!

The Bitchy Crab
The Bitchy Crab
10 years ago

And Giselle on a CI!

Audit In Progress
Audit In Progress
10 years ago

True to life, the Brazillian is the true ripper, Merrick funshape or not.

Burnsy
Burnsy
10 years ago

I am waiting ever so patiently for his dry spell to come to an end so that Adriano/cock thumbnail on the homepage won’t be throbbing in my face every time I click on the site. Shudder.

The Bitchy Crab
The Bitchy Crab
10 years ago

…jesus,you wanna talk dry? Today, I started posting two-year-old photos that’ve already run in Surfer.

Karl Von Fanningstadt
Karl Von Fanningstadt
10 years ago

Wiggs and I enjoyed it!

wincy
wincy
10 years ago

Why not do a currency exchange forecast for the Ozzie dollar against the US. Whilst dry it would be useful. Mum don’t mind education.


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