Move over Kim and Kanye...the Coffeys are here!
Two years ago-ish I traveled to Hossegor, France to call the Swatch Pro alongside Paul Evans, Brodie Carr and a host of wonderful friends. The surf was zero but the talent was impressive. I got drunk in the booth and maybe banned from calling future WSL events.
Two of the five Coffey sisters were there and both surfed well. Holly-Sue and Ellie-Jean. Their dad was also there half coaching half managing impressive social media accounts. I saw him telling one of them, hopefully the older of the two, to get more sexy for the cam, like to fluff up her cans or something, which was strange but also sensible.
He had longer hair and wore leather. Paul and I made many jokes but I can’t remember any of them now. Paul do you remember any? Did we call him Billy Ray? Something like that but funnier. I spoke with him, anyhow, and he seemed alright. There had been some tragedy and he had packed his entire family up and traveled Australia in a van just surfing and Instagramming. It seemed strange but also sensible.
And now it appears all his dreams have come true. The Daily Telegraph just bestowed the highly sought after name “Kardashians of Australian Surfing” upon the family! Lets read:
They’ve been dubbed the Kardashians of Australian surfing.
And now the Coffey siblings – Jackson, Holly-Sue, Ellie-Jean, Bonnie-Lou and Ruby-Lee – are riding the wave of success thanks to social media and their followers who want to see them live their sponsor-paid lifestyle.
The bronzed family’s success has been driven by pro-surf sisters, 21-year-old Ellie-Jean and Holly-Sue, 18, who are paid share bikini-clad photos to Instagram.
Although there are some differences between the Sydney siblings and the Los Angeles icons, their father Jason said they embrace the comparisons to the first family of reality television.
‘Say what you like about the Kardashians, they may not be very talented but at the end of the day they’re a big strong family unit,’ Jason told The Daily Telegraph.
‘We’re more like the Kardashians in that sense than anything else.’
Combined, the five siblings from Sydney’s Northern Beaches have more than 900,000 followers on Instagram.
‘Free surfer’ Jackson, 21, has reached 100,000 followers on the social media while younger sisters Ruby-Lee, 16, and Bonnie-Lou, 13, boast 160,000 followers between them.
With Ellie-Jean and Holly-Sue competing on the second-tier Women’s Qualifying Series, they still acknowledge what a place on the pro-circuit would do for their profiles.
‘If both of us were to make the tour it would be amazing for social media,’ Holly-Sue said.
And ok ok ok. Real quick, there are two things I absolutely love about this bit.
- Jason admitting that the Kardashians are not very talented but, apparently, have a strong family bond. I am not being ironic here. Talent is great but look at the mighty empire Derek Rielly, Rory Parker and I have built without any at all. Talent is overrated!
- Holly-Sue admitting that the world tour would be amazing for social media. That social media is valuable and the world tour is not. Very funny!
I wish the Coffey family nothing but wild success moving forward.
Correction: After perusing the Daily Telegraph piece I realize there are four sisters and one brother.
Correction: Coming on the heels of the sexless ESPN nude this story smacks of severe sexism. Just pretend it doesn’t when you are reading though, ok?
I never knew there were Kardashians on American Surfing or anywhere else in the world. And I’ve never knew Kardashians out of surfing use to travel in a Van to do Social Media stuff. Man, all your comparisions are thrown in the trashcan. Worst thing you’ve ever tried to do.
I guess fathers paraded and solicited their daughters back in the dark ages, see no difference now really.
This must have been a no news day?
This is one too, right?
Thats Dave Wassel.
Hahahahahahahaha
oh dear, the ‘dress sense’.
someone please quietly whisper to them that ‘that look isn’t really a look’
The Kardashians are very loyal and loving to each other, but yes untalented.
Dear Chas, you rocked with this article!!!! Talent is overrated! BREXIT!!!! TRUMP!!!! Come to Brazil, try to understand the actual economic and political turmoil and you will be 275% sure that Talent is overrated! People are fucking dumb. 98% of the population don’t care about anything, just the moment, the image and worthless shit.
i’ll never understand the social media world they live in. how many people look at a photo of them with their cans out / in stupid onepieces with their cans out and actually have a clue what the brand / juice / lifestyle is they’re spruiking (rather than just move onto the next cans out photo), let alone take the time to click through and buy their product. how does that economy even work?
It doesn’t. It’s just hype, no money.
couple of muppets. Pops is a fucktard for whoring out his daughters. A smart fucktard, mind you.
I could imagine Rosie Hodge bitch scratching one of these “models”..
shame what they did to lamar odom
Are White-Trash-Chic names big in AUS?
If I recall, I think the dad has a kink for 50s music or something like that…
That’s a best worst-case scenario.
or “Petticoat Junction”?
none of the names are -lynn so they havent reached full white trash status, but bonnie-lou is pretty damn close…..
Coffeshians
They look like Stifler’s Mom.
So here I am checking in on the ol’ ‘Grit’ looking for an appropriate comment section to inform my fellow degenerates that Alanna Blanchard is live streaming a workout on facebook right now, and what better surprise than an article about the Kardashian’s of surf?… isn’t life funny? Pure Gold Chas, glad we’re all on the same page here 🙂
Meh ….. Alana Blanchard is so old news!! Could be a new surf “rig” and “fit” off which could be so exciting though!!
Great minds! Did you watch Alanna work out?
where are the sex tapes then?
You can only hope they are as careless with their snapchat as Miss Ashley
Jackson is dehyphenated coffey
This made me laugh too much.
What does jackson think when his sisters are oiling each other up in front of him, hugging him with that massive boobige……one path leads to incest, the other to homosexuality….one path leads to screwing, one to getting screwed….. Kardashian indeed
*Golf clap*
There was a typo. His name is “Jacks-on”
I hope all young Beachgrit readers, of which I assume there are none or if so are very boring people, adopt you Chas, as their life guide. Oh the places they will go!
Me too!