I'm rich!
I'm rich!

Imperialism: The Zuck vs. Kauai!

Is the world's 6th richest man taking advantage of beleaguered Hawaiians?

Mark Zuckerberg is following the path of the “rich man” to a tee. Make a killing with a new innovation; fuck over a bunch of people on the way to fame and fortune; then flaunt that wealth with reckless abandon across the globe. Maybe the wealthiest people in the world (Zuckerberg is the 6th richest man on earth) have a “How to piss on the little guy” handbook and Mark just hit chapter 3 aptly titled “Destroy cultures for private houses and resorts.”

Mark’s new vacation home sits on land that is owned by locals, deceased people and a few individuals that have no knowledge of their ties to “1/4% to 1%” of the land. Mark has filed lawsuits against over 100 people to coerce the owners into selling the land so construction can continue. The owners of the land are descendants of farmers that were allowed to claim the land they lived on as their own back when the Kuleana Act of 1850 was established.

Can the locals get a break from imperialism already? First Captain Cook and white missionaries try to snuff out surfing all together. Then the influx of big surf brands buying up property on Kam highway. Dustin Barca and Eddie Rothman are still fighting Monsanto, DuPont Pioneer, and other GMO scientific research companies for conducting testing that is causing serious damage to the livelihood of future generations of Hawaiians. The theme is consistent with the overall story of the Hawaiian people. Outsiders coming in and taking what they want, with a general disregard or back handed “respect” for the locals. Business as usual.

Mark’s compound is on land parcels shared by locals in the area. When he arrived to build the house and compound, he dropped a measly $100 million on the land. The complaints mounted against the project from the obvious to the petty; including complaints that his private security detail were parked on the road, to the glaringly obvious that Hawaiians are tired of having money, status and power dismantle their culture because those in power have the means to do so.

Mark and his camp claim that they just want to pay everyone what they deserve for the land and that the lawsuit was filed to avoid a lawsuit coming their direction. To battle the negative press coming out, Mark took to his own Facebook to make a statement.

“We are working with a professor of native Hawaiian studies and long time member of this community, who is participating in this quiet title process with us… It is important to us that we respect Hawaiian history and traditions.”

Well Mark, the locals don’t care if you have one professor on your payroll to make sure you can build whatever you want, and to help circumvent any legal problems that may arise. The local’s want their land untarnished, their culture not trampled on, and to keep their Mana levels high. For a guy who is allegedly pretty smart, maybe he should read Chas’s book (he totally should!), watch the Eddie documentary that ESPN put out, or maybe just talk to the locals there so that drama like this doesn’t happen.

Hawaiian: The Legend of Eddie Aikau

Zuckerberg and Facebook have had a rough year; the guy just wants to sip a Mai Tai while the trade winds roll over the island. The business blog 24/7 Wall St. reported on their annual “Most Hated Companies” list on January 10, 2017, and Mark’s baby was listed at 6th place. Data collection, privacy concerns, and Mark’s own reactions to dealing with “Fake News” have tarnished the social media empire. I won’t even begin to tackle that issue but nonetheless Facebook is rocking the boat. Personally I became fed up with the site and deleted mine entirely.

The people of Hawaii are justified to take issue with another rich asshole entitled and selfish enough to take more land away for vacation homes, resorts or GMO test facilities. Mark seems to have the same attitude that cost Captain Cook his life on the Big Island. Do not underestimate the strength of local Hawaiians. Money, power and condescending respect will get you a spear in your back as a beautiful Hawaiian sun sets. Mark if you have any questions about what it’s like when the locals bite back for your actions, give Graham Stapelberg a call on how it feels to get properly smacked by Fast Eddie.

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NUG
NUG
9 years ago

Nice read Adam. A welcome pleasure reading an original piece instead of the usual someone else wrote something and I’m going to recap it nonsense.

Doobalachy
Doobalachy
9 years ago

Maybe Rorey Parkers wife can help the local Hawaiians?

Otto
Otto
9 years ago

Those discussions Zuckerberg had with Obama at the White House in 2014 must have strayed from tech talk to how to real property grab walk in Hawaii…..ya know what I mean.
Zuckerburg: “Hey President Obama, you’re from Hawaii right? Yeah, so I was thinking of “investing” **wink wink** in Kauai to help their “economy and preservation of culture”. Got any pointers or connects?

I don’t think Zuckerberg will have much luck setting up any sort of “play date” with Trump at the White House.

Rhino
Rhino
9 years ago
Reply to  Otto

You really think Trump gives a shit about native land rights? He’s just signed off on advancing the Dakota Access Pipeline…

huma's tears
huma's tears
9 years ago

If they were forced through eminent domain, or some version of that, its raw. But, it seems that some still own land, and if they want to keep it the laws should protect them. If they don’t, bring on the protesters, and I bet he would fold, if only to protect the stock value of Facebook.

If property rights can be compared to surf etiquette, Zuckerberg is riding a hydroplane SUP.

Nick Dee
Nick Dee
9 years ago

Why does a rich white city Jew boy want land in Kauai? Probably thinks he might save himself from the next civil or nuclear war.

Bob Jones
Bob Jones
9 years ago
Reply to  Nick Dee

What does being a Jew have to do with it?

wincy
wincy
9 years ago
Reply to  Bob Jones

He can’t help himself he brings it up every time.

funky Gibbon
funky Gibbon
9 years ago

And everyone called fast Eddie a thug when he brought this issue up recently.

Bob Jones
Bob Jones
9 years ago
Reply to  funky Gibbon

He is a fucking thug though. He can make a good cause turn into a shit one

Abscessed Llama
Abscessed Llama
9 years ago

Lewis went to Google. Is it possible Parker is at Facebook?

Neah Kah Nie Pirate
Neah Kah Nie Pirate
9 years ago

The movie ‘Aloha’ by Cam Crowe was a brilliant illustration of the power clash between imperialism and sovereignty.

Neah Kah Nie Pirate
Neah Kah Nie Pirate
9 years ago

Add it to the list of the Dole Plantation owning Hawaii forever and Oracle buying an entire island. The Oligarchy marches on.

Mapski
Mapski
9 years ago

Larry Ellison owns 98% of Lanai yet Hawaiians can wait twenty years on a registry in order to buy housing. Absurd.

velobwoy
velobwoy
9 years ago

So… Zuckerberg’s land is not owned by locals. He owns a large swath of land, that he bought from Jimmy Pflueger/Mary Lucas Estate. Within that swath are kuleanas (think 1/2 acre spots in various places in the swath) that have, for the most part, been in people’s hands for generations. Access to these kuleanas is across Zuckerberg’s land, hence his desire for privacy. I don’t even know if all these kuleanas have utility easements.

Carlos Andrade (heavy Hanalei local) is the professor who’s assisting Z’berg. As with most such issues, the reality is not quite so black & white as the above hot-take makes it out.

Obviously, the seeming coercive aspect of z’bergs action is the most reprehensible. If he offers the owners well above market value and they want to take him up on it, that’s one thing. If someone is forced to sell because they can’t afford an attorney, that is bullying, and it’s a human rights infraction that shouldn’t be tolerated by the community.

Anyone vilifying Z’berg needs to include members of Kauai’s County government and planning commission over the past 60 years, whose plantation/mafioso mentality made possible the current zoning and land use fiasco that is Kauai.

skinflute
skinflute
9 years ago
Reply to  velobwoy

Kuleana – “Right, privilege, concern, responsibility, title , business, property, estate, portion, jurisdiction, authority, liability, interest, claim, ownership, tenure, affair, province, reason, cause, function, justification…”

Captain Clark
Captain Clark
9 years ago

Money makes things happen.

huma's tears
huma's tears
9 years ago

I have little but spite and bile for Facebook, but why did islanders looking to protect their land sell to him or whoever owned it previous to Zuckerberg? At some point there was an exchange of cash for land that didn’t have to take place, and any complainers that sold it need to grow up. Don’t sell in the first place.

With regard to the property rights that Zuckerberg is currently attempting to purchase, I would agree any owners that don’t want to should not be legally compelled to do so. As I understand it, however, many of them may be dead or unaware they have any property whatsoever. If someone knows, and simply doesn’t want to sell, they should be able to hold on to their land. If they do want to sell, it’s their land and their choice.

?uzzled
?uzzled
9 years ago
Reply to  huma's tears

Technically if a property has an owner with a minority stake that is holding up a proposed development the sale can be forced through use of eminent domain laws.

Captain Clark
Captain Clark
9 years ago
Reply to  ?uzzled

I was under the impression that eminent domain was just a state government thing. Does it also apply to the public?

?uzzled
?uzzled
9 years ago
Reply to  Captain Clark

The state or local government can impose eminent domain if it is in the best interest of the people of the state. It is often used for private development with the best interest being enconimic prosperity and increased tax revenue.

Captain Clark
Captain Clark
9 years ago
Reply to  ?uzzled

My family and I have dealt with the state of Florida on numerous occasions with eminent domain. Those cheating bastards try and near about steal the property away from you. It’s shocking the power that the state has under that law, but I didn’t think it was a public sector thing. Disturbing.

Tired old guy
Tired old guy
9 years ago
Reply to  Captain Clark

The city of Jax Beach took an entire block in an industrial zone ( with my factory and a number of other board builders included) by eminent domain to put in an unnecessary thru road . Don’t kid yourself, in Florida, the government rules, and literally couldn’t give a god damn about your livelihood . fair or not

Captain Clark
Captain Clark
9 years ago
Reply to  Tired old guy

There is no doubt about that. They are going to 6 Lane our major road here in the panhandle under the gyse of “Hurricane evacuation route”. This will be the 4th time my family has had property taken under eminent domain and every single time it’s a raw deal.

?uzzled
?uzzled
9 years ago

I don’t have a ton of money but have visited Hawaii. Even though I rented a condo and didn’t buy a piece of land I felt like I was a part of watering down Hawaiian culture. I’m used to being the “local” and feeling a little crowded out by tourists so I did not feel too good about being a tourist myself.
Why don’t these rich fuckers just roll low key? Zuckerberg has a pile of money but he is still a kook.


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