Welcome to the family Michelob Ultra!
Move over…ummm Monster? and make way for something better! The World Surf League just rolled out a sponsor for its American events, including the U.S. Open of Surfing and Trestles, and things are gonna get ULTRA cool!
That’s right my dawgs. Michelob Ultra, the beer for people who like to work out and also don’t like to drink beer, has found a market and it is you and it is me and it is Kolohe Andino’s dad Dino. Shall we learn about our new brew?
Michelob Ultra has (per 12 fl. oz.):
0.0 g fat
2.6 g carbs
95 calories
0.6 g protein
4.2% alcohol by volume
A Michelob Ultra spokesperson said:
“As our brand continues to gain momentum, our new partnership with the World Surf League will further connect us to those who are passionate about living the active and balanced lifestyle that Michelob Ultra celebrates.”
Michelob Ultra says the new deal is part of its strategy to reach ‘drinkers who embrace and prioritise an active, balanced lifestyle.’ Financial terms have not been released.
And while I appreciate that Michelob’s parent company Anheuser-Busch feels that surfers are interested in a superior tasting light beer that promotes an active, social lifestyle part of me wishes we could have been sponsored by the -Rita series which features beer masquerading as margaritas. We have Lime-a-Rita, Straw-Ber-Rita, Lemon-ade-Rita, Mang-o-Rita and Grape-a-Rita.
Lime-a-Rita etc. have (per 12 fl. 0z):
8% alcohol by volume
But beggars can’t be choosers and welcome aboard Michelob Ultra. Things gonna get WILD!
(quick question… how many Michelob Ultra’s does it take to get drunk?)
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How the fuck do you even pronounce the name??
Michel Ob?
Miche Lob?
if you can’t pronounce it, your sure as fuck not going to order one
You cannot drink yourself gay! You can be gay and drink yourself Chas. However, if this occurs seek help. There are groups that cans exorcize the chas.
will they force wsl to zoom in and crop off kanoe’s shock top visor?
This is like when Smirnoff dropped the big Hawaii event to be replaced by Jose Cuervo. The year after that the event was done. As all BeachGrit reporters know, as your alcohol quality drops, so do your hopes of survival.
Amen Saint Nick.
I am up there with the last dodo! The last tasmanian tiger!
I am a unicorn!
They should have just sponsored Michel Bourez
Very insightful, although, i’m confused as to why one would use a Former ad as the headline photo for this article?
So I never thought this would happen to me, but one time I found myself living in a 2-on-1 rental where I shared the garage with the front house. The dad was a sales rep/driver for Anheuser-Busch and apparently they get all kinds of free beer. Which he stacked (quite high) in our garage and told me “help yourself, take all you want, I don’t drink!”. So Mich Ultra was in the mix there, and did I mention that I’m the unpickiest beer drinker ever? That I recently discovered that Rolling Rock is only like 6 bucks a twelver at the Rite Aid and I am on it? But you know what? That Ultra is undrinkable, like mildly beer-flavored tonic water with a cat pee aftertaste. Can’t say how much it takes to get drunk, because I never tried to find out.
So what your saying is that it’s the perfect fit?
That’s a trick question…you can drink a hundred of those things and never get drunk.
That’s why they, like Bud Light, are the perfect beer for watching football on a Sunday…you can drink all day at the bar and not get yelled at by the wife for coming home shitfaced.
getting yelled at by the wife while sober is even worse
Good point.
Can you even buy that watered down shit in Aus?
Fuck, for the sake of Australia- I hope not.
Australia has its own selection of piss weak beer.
Oh, I know.
Strayan’s are serious about booze mate. Bottle shops are drive through and come with traffic lights to clear the runway of pesky sober drivers. It’s hard enough to text message and drive pissed with a can in hand, five empties on the floor, and a pack of salt n vinegar chips in the other, let alone watch for other vehicles.
(*If Big Brother tracks my web history that comment was parody)
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