Existential questions answered by Chas Smith on the podcast Surf Splendor.
Earlier today, Chas Smith, from BeachGrit, made his weekly appearance on the San Clemente-based podcast Surf Splendor.
Prior to the interview, Surf Splendor‘s David Lee Scales sent a document of topics to be discussed, which you can examine here.
The discussion is a good one despite “Chas being woefully underprepared. He hardly even skimmed the show outline,” David said afterwards.
It’s the first podcast I’ve ever listened to from start to finish. When I read “podcast” I think, unedited interview, a torturous spool of directionless back and forthing.
David is a marvellous host, however, who keeps the show tight. He has opinion but rarely sears it with bitterness. There are no persecution complex, no hot-potato, knee-jerk reactions.
The highlights: surf fashion as applied to the newish labels Former and Outerknown, a little something on why Rory Parker and BeachGrit stopped being pals, the either very good or very bad music on Albee Layer’s new short and whether or not Albee might be dumb (Chas, who has a degree in linguistics, promises to call and find out), some sorta blood feud and a few other not-so-solemn topics.
Listen here.
:
One more thing: shortboarding and “corked out airs” aren’t the only forms of surfing at its highest level, i.e., there’s a lot of body surfers, longboarders, midlengthers, fish-riders, etc. that are amazing surfers and refreshing to watch, opposed to the manic board humping turn-to-air 135lb lowers paddle for everything kooks. Just my take.
Main takeaway from the podcast: Chas loves “huge, straight, boned-out airs.” No surprise there.
And he likes his boards “short and fat.”
Anyone else notice that David Lee Scales + Scott Bass = Tommy Lee Bass, as in the given name of Tommy Lee, the Mötley Crüe drummer who passed Pam onto Slater?
Methinks it really might be LA liberal media surfing entertainment conspiracy facelift bleeding! Someone ask Peter King…
I’m normally a fan of what both of you put out, but that was painful shoe gazing. I imagine you were tenderly holding each other’s cocks whilst you recorded, desperately straining not to blink and break eye contact.
1. Depending on the rails, and wide point, it’s totally ok to carry a longboard wax in, tail forward.
2. Function over form for clothing, Chas. The culture point is BS. Every dude I know who dresses for form over function has their nose up in the air almost every time they open their mouth.
I dunno, dude’s ripping as far as I’m concerned.
Surf Splendor is unlistenable. The host talks so fucking slow, over- enunciates every word and his vocal inflection makes every sentence sound like a question. His prissy milk toast opinions make me hate myself for being a surfer.
Ain’t That Swell is the only podcast I can stomach.
Arggggghhhh!!
You are definitely a try hard if you worry about what the “correct” way to hold your board. Jayzus
Good job being yourself, Chas. That takes balls. Your armadillo hide thick-skin is admirable.
“Pushing stuff that’s also good quality” LOL
I’m avoiding it like pickles at chik-fil-a
David: “Did you click and check [Aladdin Mag] out? What’d you think?”
Chas: “I did. I loved it. I loved those kind of eclectic surf shots stitched together… uhhhhhh.. in a fun way. To me that tells a story of…. you know I mean surfing is such a visual thing right and… so it’s fun to look at all these kind of images”
There is roughly a zero percent chance Chas actually looked at Aladdin Mag.
How’d the bee removal go, Charlie?
I missed that at first, but obviously you are right. “Um, yeah, that was really [hand over mouth, mumbling] flgawesomel. I really like the thing he did with the thing”.
Fuck chas is boring. Write 500 words i can deal with. But him rambling on … sheesh. And did the ‘dude’ just compare surf journalism to renaissance painting? Nothing said here at all. And the host … fucking vapid. Oh lick lick lick slobber slobber slobber “what i love about (beachgrit) … zeitgeist”. Have you ever heard more southern cali bro surf shit in your life?
A few mins in and cutttttttttttttttt
Surfing sucks!
The host sounds like a Ninja Turtle. Bro, dude, shred and cowabunga
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Raphael needs to do some crunches
That’s clearly Donatello! C’mon man!
Actually he has a ‘L’ on his belt, must be Leonardo. Or that just stands for ‘Lame’ . So radddddical dude, shred on!
so you’re making a documentary about lisa anderson. what’s in it for me?
hahaha
11:52 for Rory. A good five minutes!
slightly disappointing…..I wanted Rory hitting up Chas for expenses in Hawaii, failing to file, screaming matches over the phone before Chas throws the phone into a brick wall and smashes it into a million pieces.
It all sounded quite subdued.
I went easy. I hate the idea of hitting when the other man can’t hit back.
Couldn’t get a more heavily armed man than the one who has his own podcast.
That’s true. But Chas is really only relevant when people push back. I’m happy to let him keep failing to pick fights.
I hope this isn’t a one off Rory, it’s grand to see you here.
I think Chas nailed Rory’s politics in the podcast, but I would argue it wasn’t often overt in his posts, perhaps because Chas complained about it when it was. I think this forced restraint tortured Rory slightly and gave his posts depth and ennui.
Taking hyperbollic speculative license here, Chas assumed the role of the Greek tyrant Phalaris, who had a bronze bull in which he locked his victims, and set a fire underneath. By virtue of a set of pipes, the escaping gas and screams were transformed into beautiful music.
From the sound of it, it appears that sometimes Chas and Rory would alternately assume the role of tyrant.
Alas, we never got our blaze of glory, and Rory burned up in the bull, leaving Chas victorious. We readers benefited from the anguish while it lasted.
Thank you for this poetry but mostly thank you for your handle. Bleedin’ Brezezinski is very high art.
Much obliged for the kind words, especially coming from such an august writer, and especially today, as I learned the Paris Review rejected my trio of sonnets on Laird’s menstruation saga.
And I thought I had a comment section monopoly on references to antiquity! Keep bleedin’, Brezezinski!
Oh yeah, Homer’s the GOAT.
The Brazen Bull! I read about this recently. Spot on mate
Rory Parker better hope there are no “tapes” of our conversations before he starts… oh wait. He never picked up the phone. Hi Rory!
I seriously doubt you are a Trump man, but the ability to send your opponents into apoplectic rage by virtue of well timed verbal needle that has a hint of truth about it, is a skill you both share. It is the reason people read BG (and the reason Trump is president).
“Little Morgan Williamson”, eh, eh? Though I’m sure you have a much better one than that.
I’ll have to admit, I cherish the “I’m-not-reacting” reaction most of all…
I find the strangest fact in this whole strange saga is that you and Rory have never met in person, never shook hands, never sat down and broken bread and spilled the blood of christ, or had a bloody mary in the morning.
You’re on the same side of the Pacific for chrissakes.
You should try punching up once in a while. It’d be more interesting.
Maybe invite him on the podcast then? it would be compelling listening and cathartic for you. To be honest, the podcasts that you enjoy the most arn’t necessarily the most interesting to us, the fanbase.
I.e that Haro one came across as a couple of old bros having a chat. which is fine I guess but when a dick slinger like Carroll comes on and drops {staged… fucker brought that written in his back pocket!} advice re your writing in hindsight was fantastic listening.
I thought you handled it well, it was honest, open, real, memorable and had all the hallmarks of a great Marc Maron podcast.
I accept! When can we Rory?
Make it in person Rory, down the back of a chook shed on a back street in Kapa’a.
I didn’t get that far in, can you summarize in 50 words Neg?
No. 1:14:00 ish on the podcast…
Who are you talking about? I slap at the brands all the time and slapped ex-WSL CEO Paul Speaker entirely out of the game!
Do you know that to be true? Not denying it, but very curious how much of an effect you had on his departure.
Oh I bet 2%. But it was a fun 2%!
Dear Mr Parker, you remind me of the last worm in the bait pail that you just can’t seem to get a good hold onto. Squirming and worming around all slippery like. I just want you on the hook dadgummit.
It was more than I ever heard previously, but you’re right more, more! Next podcast, please.
Has Chas had voice training?
he speaks in a lower register now.
Hung over!
it suits.
not to be offensive but that high pitched californian drawl seems to drain IQ away from the speaker.
I haven’t listened to the poddy (does that work? Or too close to “potty?” In which case – maybe it does work) yet, but I can assure you, the music in Albee’s edit is bad. Very bad. Very, very bad.
There is nothing fucking close to The Nine Club in surf podcast land.
Never heard of it, I’ll have to check it out!
That’s cuz it’s a skateboarding podcast…I code switch.
Well then I won’t check it out…
Jesus Christ, I was gonna comment about that! Who knew Chris Roberts could be such a host? The Marc Johnson one was SO good.
He plays the shtick perfectly and Bagley is a skate Warshaw. The treatment of Kelly Hart as a dumb child or animal round it out perfectly.
Roger is insane with his skate nerdness, he seems to know about the most obscure brands and riders
The Nine Club is real good, Chris really gets guys to open up with help from Rodger and Kelly, however it feels like skateboarders aren’t as afraid to dish dirt when they feel the industry or other skaters have behaved shittily and actually accept it as part of the business.
Have you checked out the Bunt? It’s a bit more “yo” style but in the Gailea Momolu episode he lets rip at tonnes of people in the industry for being dicks
Bunt guests are always cool but stoned Canadians playing thug makes for terrible hosting. I tune out minus select guests (Phelps, Wenning, Suciu were all I heard in season 04).
So true, the Bunt’s Stevie Williams interview just droned on forever whereas in the Nine Club Chris and Roger kept moving topics forward (though still not my favourite episode even if Stevie did call out the industry a bit)
Going to have to check some of the new Bunt episodes out anyhow
The Nine Club has nothing on The Bunt. Best skateboarding podcast out there.
Guests are good, always real shit there, but the hosts suck. Between Canadian accents, retarded pronunciation on the Vans ads, the wannabe gangbanger schtick, and saying “that’s what’s up” every forty seconds, I can’t get into it every week. They just sound semi-retarded.
This coming from a guy who likes both Canadians and gangbangers.