Did I tell you about the time I went on a Mexican
holiday with Filipe Toledo? And what a wonderful boy he
was – how he cheered sunsets, how he never used his higher ranking
in the hierarchy to steal the front seat of the pickup for the long
drive to the beach or to claim the biggest bed and so on?
Oh I did?
Well, just as fabulous on that vacay was his filmer Bruno
Baroni. He never complained about a damn thing, was always helping,
and, at night, was very good at improvised bongo.
Of course we all know what happened at Jeffreys Bay this year.
No one even came close to touching Filipe at the classic right. And
those two oops? And the way he tagged the thing to the beach, even
after he knew it was a ten?
Here, in this eleven-minute cut by Bruno Baroni, we follow
Filipe as he tests various boards and, ultimately, rides to
glory.
Watch!
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This stud is worth almost half-a-bill. Maybe he's gonna
be SurfStitch's new daddy.
If you live in Australia, you’ll know
Kogan.com. It’s the classic online discounter. Started out
making TVs cheap and undercutting everyone, until it turned into a
two hundred mill a year biz.
Lately, it’s got into phone plans, unlimited everything and a
ton of data for twenty-five bucks a month.
Its founder, tech wizard Rusland Kogan, who is worth almost
half-a-billion dollars, is convinced there’s a domino stack of
online retailers about to collapse and he’s going to be there,
waiting, to snatch ’em up for pennies.
As he told AAP,
“Over the last decade there has been a lot of online retailers
who have done a great job in raising money building a website and
then blow all the money on marketing and building a brand. As
a result of that, we see a lot of those falling over in the coming
year and that creates an opportunity for Kogan.com.”
And, as posited by SBS News,
“Chief financial officer David Shafer said the company was a
bargain hunter and would only buy if the business was good value
and earnings accretive.
“Surf and sporting goods retailer Surfstitch and homewares and
furniture business Temple & Webster are two high-profile and
publicly traded loss-making online retailers.”
SurfStitch shares are currently suspended pending various legal
travails.
The last time they traded, each share was worth a little under
seven cents, down from almost two bucks back in the glory days of
late 2015.
SurfStitch’s market cap is around eighteen mill.
Peanuts for Kogan.
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Just think how good it would feel to own Surfer
magazine!
Could it be? Might it be? A little bird says maybe
yes!
I’m telling you right here, right now, hand
over heart that I’ve never once posted a completely unfounded rumor
on BeachGrit. Never. I enjoy satire, The Onion,
etc. but once you travel down pure satire road then it is
difficult/impossible to ever come back and you need us to be
true-ish. Right? You want fact-ish. Yeah?
I think Derek and I both believe this and believe this very much
and strive, each and every day, to deliver nothing but the
flimsiest truth.
Each and every rumor that travels into my telephone, email box,
ear is from either a legitimate source or legitimately backed
up.
And this one is from a legitimate source though not at all
legitimately backed up.
I’ve rumored a few times now
that the crown jewel of surf media, Surfer magazine, was
on the block but today and unsolicited I heard who the buyer
allegedly was.
Ready?
Purportedly Adam Sandler!
Hollywood’s five year’s ago favorite leading funny man!
Known surfer!
Co-star of Surfer magazine’s current Editor-in-Chief
Todd Marinovich’s literary inspiration 50 First
Dates!
Can you believe it?
Me?
Sort of.
If you loved to surf, were rich and weren’t known for “taste”
and suddenly the crown jewel of surf media came on the market for a
low low introductory price why wouldn’t you scoop it up? I would. I
would scoop it up if only to print large sized photographs from
Surfer’s vault for my Malibu walls. And gift large sized
photographs from Surfer’s vault for my friend’s Malibu
walls. That alone would justify the ummmm cost.
But again… the more important question is, if this is all true,
what would Adam Sandler do with his number one fan Editor-in-Chief
Todd Marinovich?
Obviously not fire but what?
Elevate to publisher? To Hugh Hefner status? Make him reprise
Rob Schneider’s roll in 50 First Dates for the rest of his tenure?
Make him go play quarterback for the new Los Vegas Raiders?
So many questions!
Again, this rumor is so flimsy but there is one whiff of
smoke.
And that’s all I’ve ever asked for.
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One year down, eight years to go! | Photo:
@kook_of_the_day
A sort of bureaucracy even the most libertarian can
love!
I read a very strange story this morning that
opened up a pandora’s box of questions in my feeble brain. It came
from the famed gossip magazine Hello! and was titled
Jools Oliver Reveals That She and the Kids Have Been Surfing
for Six Years.
And it made me stop because doesn’t that read like Jools Oliver,
the wife of famous British chef Jamie Oliver, and her kids are
doing something… illegal? Or at least very frowned upon? Like… that
they all low-grade prescription pill addictions or something?
Strange.
But it was the subhead that gave rise to my questions. Jamie
Oliver and his family have been learning to surf for six
years.
Learning? For six years? That’s a long time! And enough for me
to click through. Let’s read together!
Jools Oliver can now add certified surfer to her list of
talents! The mum-of-five has revealed that she and her family have
been learning how to surf for the past six years, and Jools has
finally been awarded her surfing certificate. Sharing a photo from
the Olivers’ family holiday in Cornwall, Jools wrote: “Me receiving
my surfing certificate. Our 6th year in Cornwall and our 6th year
learning to surf with the truly fantastic George and his incredible
team. I have only missed one year when I was pregnant with little
Bud but as a family, we spend one whole week getting up at 6.30am
and hitting the beautiful beach and we learn to surf.”
Can this be true? Does England require surfers to get certified?
Should every country in the world do this?
Oh I hate bureaucracy more than the next man, especially if the
next man is Australian, but just think how fantastic it would be
for people to meet a minimum level of competency before paddling
out!
1) Must be able to hold board through entire duckdive.
2) Must be able to identify the peak of the wave.
3) Etc.
4) Etc.
You know the rules. And now after six short years Jools Oliver
does too!
But do you think this is a good idea? And who should be in
charge of issuing surf licenses? Should we give the honor to
Cornwall since it appears they are already engaged in the
practice?
Do you remember when the retro tide washed front-zip
wetsuit tops into fashion? How long ago was it, five, six
years ago?
I could hardly believe my eyes. Hadn’t society come to the
conclusion that the back zip was fatally flawed, and that zip-free
suits or at most a small zip across the chest were the
solution?
I appreciated, as a child, and very much, the reveal of a
woman’s bosom in these sorts of suits and often introduced this
imagery into my night and early morning thoughts.
This, for example.
And this,
But fashion, like lust, hath no logic.
And before long, I too, was paddling around with the
uncomfortable hunk of plastic pushed against the deck of my
surfboard. A couple of gals commented favourably upon the garment
and I persisted with it until logic won, as it always does, and it
was either trunks or short-sleeved steamer in summer and
spring.
Still, I seem ’em around and some surfers even seem to thrive in
the front-zipper, rarely surfing without it.
Are you in thrall the concept or do you find it the high-water
mark of fashion over function?
