Two places behind Portugal's Frederico Morais. Conspiracy?
The Surfer Poll awards were held last night and I am sad I wasn’t there. As much as I chuckle at the surfer fashions and the interior of Turtle Bay and the perpetually awkward master of ceremonies, the Surfer Poll is the only night we have. It is our Academy Awards, Golden Globes and Teen Choice Awards rolled into one.
Next year I will go but this year I was duty bound to book and to film. And to snidely laughing up my tattoo sleeve at Stab trying to be edgy by allegedly microdosing acid.
But let’s get on to some real controversy shall we? Might we? The Surfer Poll, as you know, is the apex of the event. Here we learn which surfers, as voted by you, are the most popular in the entire world. Past winners include Dane Reynolds, Kelly Slater, Andy Irons and John John Florence. No surprise. This year the winner was John John Florence and Kelly Slater was second. Frederico Morais was fourth and Gabriel Medina was sixth.
What?
Wait.
Frederico Morais was fourth and Gabriel Medina was sixth?
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.
Hmmm.
Now, I’ve been on a bit of a conspiracy kick lately but let us examine the facts. Frederico has 64,000 Instagram followers. Gabriel has near 6 million. Frederico has Portugal (10 million) and Gabriel has Brazil (210 million). Frederico has… a nice top turn and Gabriel has… nice armpits. But really. Do you think that more people voted for Frederico than Gabriel? Do you really think so?
Hmmmmmmmmmmmm.
Do you really really think so?