Is he your favorite surfer yet?
I was invited to attend a performance at the local high school, when I was five, because my father had a role in it. I remember sitting on the hard wooden bench in the gymnasium. I remember being transfixed my the cheerleaders. I remember wishing I was in something other than bellbottom overalls.
The show was fine enough, a cowboy sort of thing where my father played Black Bart, the maudlin bank robber. There was much exaggerated shouting and big arm movements. Eventually the sheriff and Black Bart met in the town square for a duel. The sheriff shot. Black Bart fell to the parquet. And next thing I knew, the cheerleaders were all surrounding me, begging me to come and give Black Bart the kiss of life.
I was very frustrated that I was in bellbottom overalls and really not wanting to be the center of attention but it was one of those moments that couldn’t be escaped and eventually I was dragged toward my father’s “dead” body. I kneeled down, kissed his cheek, he came back to life.
It might have been that moment, there, that I started cheering for the bad guy. For Darth Vader, Cal Hockley, the marines killing those damned Na’vi. Would you like to know a secret? I cheered for Gabriel Medina too. His antics, two days ago, put him in rare company. Dropping in on Kelly Slater then trying to milk an interference? Dirty. Sitting on Jeremy Flores and not letting him paddle? Dirty.
I would kiss his cheek, if I could. Maybe someday I will.
In the meantime, here is another podcast that speaks to Gabriel Medina’s essential role in the World Surf League pantheon, the poor quality of WSL judging and the last days of Turp n Pottz. Listen if you feel like. I don’t know how good it is, frankly. I was hungover and my brain was not working well.
You know, Chas, nearly a third of the guys on tour are Brazilian, don’t you think they need some representation in the broadcast booth? I’d listen to Andre (beach interview guy in Brazil) or Carlos Burle call heats. Just a thought after listening to this episode and sharing your criticisms of the casters.
Gabby is truly a gifted and talented surfer, he is a fierce and brilliant competitor and loves his family ( kisses his mom even ), he is truly a noble Fucktard.
We agree that this Slater drop is not exactly a drop, right? And he did not try, as Slater says, to “surf the wave”.
https://www.facebook.com/co…
are you crying ?
Hello!
I’m Brazilian and would like to give my point of view about what they said about Gabriel Medina in podcast. This text is a defense against it. In advance, I beg pardon if I commit some errors of English – it is not my mother language, I speak better than I write, but I am sure you are going understandwhat I’m going to say.
Well, I’m one of those who, at first, would hate to have a person like Medina next me. I do not compromise with almost no value, even in relation to competitiveness, patriotism, religion, lifestyle, etc. I have reservations about Charles accompanying him as a shadow, because I think that nfantilizes Medina and prevents him from growing.
At one point in the podcast there is a question: all Brazilians, “Brazilians of character”, are admirers of the Medina. I can answer with certainty that many close friends and people who I know from our surfing forum have many reservations about “Medina way of surf/life. But:
We are a country that forever derided in the pre and post cool world of surfing. Look what happened and happens to Adriano de Souza. See the previous generation. See what people talk about Brazilians in and out of the water.
The WSL judgment has been frankly, since last year, very supportive of the JJF. I can remind at least three major episodes: Teahupoo 2015 – Florence x Medina; Trastles 2015; and finally Ethan x JJF this year – this last episode decided the title.
I believe, and now like Medina, it would only be possible to win this step by surfing two, three steps above the others. How to surf three steps above JJF? Otherwise, the judgment would favor the Hawaiian (I am very careful with accusations, but I have seen too many batteries for not finding, though every critical sense, that there is no such favor.)
What leads Medina to surfing batteries the way he surfs?
Certainly the way he was shaped to compete; certainly his personality; certainly the absolute belief that this is how it competes (see your hero, Aytron Senna, see how he competed).
However, I believe that there is in it a desperate attempt to, using now the words of Jeremy Flores, “to overcome the system.” If, yes, we are Brazilian, if, yes, we are denigrated, defamed – why not? – badly judged in disputes, if this is all, in our eyes, truth, what to do but compete as if it were the last day of life, although eventually you have to get in front of the wave of whoever. Someone like Slater, a legend, a god, a hero, but who has more than once harmed, with words and gestures, the career of people like Adriano de Souza and Jadson André.
Do not get me wrong. For me, because I’m outside, it is easier to see an ethnocentric, Eurocentric look – the look of the dominant over the dominated one. The way you talk about Gabriel, the way you treat him is so condescending … It makes you want to drop all the waves ahead and say, “Hi, pleasure, I’m here and I’m going to stay here”.
That is why I, the person not adept at any warlike, patriotic, individualistic endeavor, and such, I suddenly find myself cheering on a subject as different from myself as Gabriel. In Pipeline, he was, yes, a hero.
By the way: in Brazil, to say that “God is on my side” is a proverb, a cliché, as common as saying “I believe in God”. It does not mean that God is “only” on someone side. It means that God is on his side, just as he is on the side of everyone. It is a literal, sloppy translation, typical of those who do not know how to speak English so well. But at least he knows how to speak English. By the way: Anybody here speaks Portuguese?
Mate, I’m as Queensland as can be, and want EE to do well, but I can’t see anything of the waves he got against JJF being better than what JJF got. The theory I would be going with is that those waves were underscored, but despite it being close on paper, the best surfer was the winner.
The reason why the rest of the world sees ‘Brazos’ the way they do is because of stereotypes perpetuated by pretty consistent behaviour. Every Brazilain I’ve met fulfils these stereotypes, bar one. (That’s based on 5 years living in Indonesia and about the same on the Gold Coast).
God. God can’t be on everyone’s side. Even though he is omnipotent. So, if that’s your belief, then you should be just walking away going “Oh well, God has greater plans for Gabby”, rather than bitching about conspiracy theories. God works in mysterious ways remember.
I’ve also lived in the Middle East. I reckon the abrahamic religions were invented there for a very good reason. If you lived there 2000 years ago, you’d want to have something good to think about while stuck in a desert hitting the 50+ C while waiting for air conditioning to be invented. I’m thinking the kind of delirium that comes on in those conditions, and exacerbated by others, also in similar states of mind, might have something to do with talking bushes. But what what do I know? The universe is expanding way beyond my ability to comprehend and we’ve got idiots doing some pretty fucken stupid things in the name of God anywhere, anytime. I’d rather just go surfing.
shit only met Brazilians on the GC/Indo , I reckon Aussies are worse , especially from the slum coast!
God does work in mysterious ways , and he is on everyones side , but that’s for the believers , and yes there are plenty of stupid shit said in the name of God , but the minority usually , bit like judging Australians on Paulines beliefs and policy’s , ain’t humanity wonderful!
Fair comment. I spent most of my time in Indo with varying levels of Australian shame with an inadvertently adapted Indonesian speaking accent that avoided any connection to Australia and confused the locals. Maybe it’s just being a surfer that drags your personality down?
For my money, the best people to travel with, outside of your mates of course, are kiwis. Quite aware of their place in the world unlike almost every other nations travellers I’ve met. Israelis being the worst.
ah only a surfer knows the feeling , of dragging your personality down , as the selfishness and the insecurity surfing breeds makes surfers a greedy bunch of narcissistic macho bullies, don’t you love the smell of ME in the morning just before the first selfie , or a GoheroPro?
On a day like this morning, I’m just happy to catch a few waves with my kids. Selfie and gopro free.
I do not believe in God. I just wanted to better explain what – I think – Gabriel tried to say, but could not exactly, because there is not in other languages a translation for the proverb I mentioned.
As for waves and evaluation: here we disagree. I think Gabriel is systematically prejudiced – the most discharged wave was that in Trestles, but there are other minor irritating distortions.
Anyway, as I said, I would not want to be Gabriel’s spokesperson – I disagree with almost everything of his public stance, although I recognize that he is an admirable and stubborn athlete.
I draw attention to how they talked about Gabriel in the podcast – the condescending, first-world mode, very, very, very elitist and ethnocentric. Brazil has 200 – two hundred! – millons of citizens. I assume you do not draw conclusions about the country from a handful – tens, hundreds? – of surfers you met around the world. Best regards!
Gabby is one of my favourite surfers, being a goofy in a natural world. More often than not, I’m wanting him to win, but while his ability is unquestioned, I think his heat strategy sometimes lets him down. The ‘keeping busy’ approach works a lot of the time, but sometimes he needs to be on the best two waves that come through in the 30 mins to get the job done. By not being in position, or having priority, when those waves come through, means he is having to chase waves and scores because he has let an inferior surfer get better waves. Rightly or wrongly, the judges currently give more credit to the bigger waves. It’s not like he doesn’t know this. If anything, he has toned down his approach towards safety surfing. Which maybe he is being coached towards rather than being an organic development.
Regards attitudes to Brazilians in general, it’s based very much on personal experience. Please note that in a different comment, I mentioned shame and embarrassment at Australians I met overseas. It could be that those who can afford to travel don’t make the best ambassadors for their countries. An over-developed sense of entitlement perhaps? Maybe it’s the travelling in packs mentality that leads to surfers to engage in poorer behaviour that they would in smaller groups.
Either way, I’m only going on my experiences. I’m aware that generalisations are a cheap way of labelling a nation. I’ve seen poor behaviour in every different country, from locals and visitors, I’ve travelled to and lived in. Don’t take it personally.
I think JJF WOULD get a higher score than Medina for the exact same maneuver on the exact same wave. But it’s not because JJF is Hawaiian or more marketable. And it’s not because Medina is Brazilian or rubs people wrong.
It’s because JJF has the sicker flow and style. Medina has style but it’s different style. It’s flawless but barbaric. It’s athlete, jock, etc. Brazilians can be perceived as not comprehending or appreciating surfing as an art. I don’t think that’s true but I do think most Brazilians see style differently than Americans and Australians.
(On style/flow) Medina’s wide stance (like a fat inverted set of pliers) doesn’t help. Check GM’s claiming poses in Pipe’s heats 4 & 5)
Watch Medina’s drop, he hits some back wash or ridge in the wave when he was dropping in
Why does Medina get the lion’s share of the flack for the kind of claiming that so many others also do?
that’s just what happens when you’re an annoying cunt
Who would have though that after all these years that Chas would once again be wearing his bell bottom overalls, this time with pride.
jesus christ you guys really don’t have a clue about that priority game do ya.
That’s my point though. The rule is flawed and makes for bad surfing. Right?
Dude the whole situation is flawed. It’s a product and consequence of the ocean. The only world where priority rules don’t exist is …the Surf Ranch.
Unless you have Fast Pass
Or are on a mobilized scooter
Have you been, Nick? I know there’s a bit of NDA bullshit floating around but the Stab guys have been, Warshaw’s been, Vaughn Blakey’s been. Guaranteed Doherty’s been. Seems like a fair cross-section of surf media have been through the hallowed gates, albeit furtively. Clearly Derek and Chas are persona non grata, how about you?
Nicks surfed it from what I can gather… Chas and Derek posted a photo of them together with a background that looks very much like the Kelly’s pool…
sounds like every surf journalist of note has a well thought out story on the pool to release when the red light turns to green… Slater is a genius.
Yeah I clocked the pic. I just didn’t think they’d be able to keep their cards quite so close to their chests in the aftermath!
I feel like such a fool Chazz! Clearly I have not dropped enough veiled hints about this!
Remember Bleached git’s epic haiku?
The Eddie is no more
So get your guns to Lemoore
We also have cows.
All I can say is, he was right.
I look forward to the battle of the hot takes when you are all allowed to speak freely! Though I do find it all kind of absurd that Slater/the WSL can silence everyone like they’re the fucking Thought Police.
Well we may be doing an all-in live Panel Hack-up so look the fuck out. After all it’s what the People want.
yes they both went but are under a WSL embargo where they cannot discuss anything about their trip and surf there until the 31st of Jan , well that’s what Kelly told me , rumor is Chas got bounced , tore his arm off and has just had a bionic one fitted!
So you’re telling me that Chas’ broken wing was courtesy of Wonka’s marvellous creation? Fascinating! Now, I know he’s no Charlie Bucket, so the question is: was he Augustus Gloop or Veruca Salt?
sorta a “salty gloop” , which could be a new brand or species !
Thats what Todd Holland said to ya brother in 1988! 🤔
you’re telling me.
The mocha was put on him by that front page of the Daily Mirror re Million dollar man.
All aussies were gutted apart from Domma n Barton!
Stab disagrees.
just contest tactics , nothing more or less , and yeah the claims are cringe worthy , but , derek Ho was the first one at Pipe to really consistently claim every barrel and stare down the judges ….so is claiming a Hawaiian thing?
You may be right.
What about Johnny Boy Gomes.
Man he had a claim/stare down like no other. Pretty much every wave at pipe.
He didn’t do much claiming after the first wave he took at Bingin. (Bounced off the reef, left with much less noise than he arrived with).
Medina is the “Black Fart”; many people look down upon him (and farts) but everyone gets excited when he shows up (or someone farts).
Chas – I love Medina not only as the villain, but as the underdog and much maligned receipt of racist, stereotypical complaints about how his cutting off surfers is typical of Brazilians – even though when he does it the act is permitted under the rules. White people throw those anti-Brazilian barbs under the false assumption that their kind don’t burn anyone are so hilarious that I have to root for the victim, Medina. Also, his surfing is fcking badass.
You misspelled “fucking.”
I’m too scared of censorship to worry about proper spelling
We come down pretty hard on disgusting degenerates who can’t spell or use punctuation.
Pod casts are so weak.
Awesome Photo shop
new drinking game. drink everytime dave scales says “i could not care…” – “i totally agree” & chas says “sure, sure,sure”
You won’t last long. Dead drunk within five minutes.
seriously, Scales, love the show but dickie’s on point. Stop totally agreeing. It’s almost as bad as Pete Mel saying “literally”
“lidderrlly”
Man, I’m totally oblivious to this stuff until you guys point it out. 2018 will be “totally agree” free. Onward!
Due diligence, scrap that one as well.
the more people that hate on Gabs , the more I like him , because, he’s been trained by ADS , who also was and is a feisty competitor , pity about the rest of the nice guys on tour or off tour!
i think that we can not escape your karma. He will pay his dues sooner or later.
does one have to believe in Karma for it to happen , can we collectively suffer from bad Karma ?
If so must be a bitch being on Team Amerika at the moment , how’s Donalds Karma?
Good, bad and Karma are just concepts. I think of karma as cause and effect. We make choices and reap what we sow. And unfortunately, collectively we do suffer from some dick heads choices. Donald and Team amerika does not look so happy these days, so I would say that they made poor choices.
but MAGA , the economy is onfire , the military are bigger and better , the USA is the economic envy of the world , all thanks to Donald!
You got a thing for donny big hands huh?
he is the saviour of the New World Order!
Black Bart’s Christian name was Charles, Charlie. Just saying.
do unto slater what slater has done to parko and beschen. Kelly just passed the torch to Gabriel. Kanoa , the secret assassin , stands in line waiting with Kolohe .
https://youtu.be/atZiUvv02N4
What he did to Beschen was far worse and he should always be reminded of it when he talks about “just letting each other catch waves and the best guy wins”
http://articles.latimes.com…
Calling Dooma, Dooma, are you receiving me? Coke Connest 1990, Dooma are you there??!!
If i had 2 more hands it would be four thumbs up for that comment.
(Credit to Dave Chapelle)
Domma was 20mts away from TC and caught the foamy. Fkn hilarious.
Kelly was fairly universally hated for that, so given the more sinister nature of Gabby’s block and that every Tomas, Dick and Fabio can now share their opinions widely, the hate versus support levels seem about right. I remember at the time thinking it was a pretty shitty move from Parko though, as Kelly had to go, but he had to make him look like an arsehole by pulling the finger. What’s so rad about Kelly in this latest tryst, is how he knew Gabby would go, but saw that he could maybe still get a score.
Did Parko receive a score for his barrell before Slater took off like kelly did??
difference is – kelly went for the wave and got a score.
Gab got a score, like a 1 or something, and he won the heat
Chaz on Monday night after watching Pipe and working on book edits all day…
https://www.youtube.com/wat…
You don’t know the half of it. This song is in Lisa Andersen movie so I listen to it 5000 times a day!
When the coke is good…