Also are surfers mongo?
The velvety pipes of Todd Richards came to my home today and sat across from David Lee Scales, kitty-corner to me, at the zinc countertop and explained why surfers are culturally appropriating assholes. How surfers take the blood, sweat and tears of the skateboarders and snowboarders before them and laugh and mock and then call things that happen above the lip of the wave “Gorkin Flips” and “Bologna Sandwiches” instead of their proper nomenclatures born in the Fires of Mordor.
We are sons of bitches and no one would argue except Todd Richards is on a mission. He wants us to come correct. To unite with our brethren and treat aerial maneuvers in the same way or, at the very least, to call them the same things.
If you are unfamiliar with Todd Richards he is a professional snowboarder, wonderful skateboarder, very good surfer and the voice of professional Olympic snowboarding (the most professional kind). You can hear a little bit of his story on the podcast and then it is gloves off but this time it is me sitting quietly, mixing bloody marys to drink all by myself, while Todd and David Lee Scales attack, parry, counter-attack. It is a fantastic reckoning, our best podcast yet, and worth a listen because the future of surf terminology hangs in the balance.
Since I was sitting quietly, mixing bloody marys to drink all by myself when we recorded at 10 am this morning I am in no state to post all the video evidence presented on the show (because I clearly had to play through and it is now 5:39 pm and I’m on……….vodka lemonade I think) but you can and should click right here and watch.
We also discuss trucker hats in the lineup, the merits and demerits of zinc and Dane Reynolds who left the entire surf world with blue balls. Unfulfilled. Son of a bitch.
But do you say “kitty-corner” or “katty-corner”?
My dog must have pissed somewhere in the house because I just caught a giant whiff.
LISTEN!
I dont get why everyone is so bent about this. Its so much easier and understandable to go by SK8 names for tricks and what not. Also jesus christo David Scales I understand you taking the literal stance on rotation because the show wouldnt have a debate. but damn dude loosen the fuck up. maybe take a fat rip off of Chas’s HOTkNIFE wax pen.
Todd seems really punk rock… didnt want to leave him out of comment.
It’s crazy how Davey was basically right but still totally lost the argument. Double fail.
Or 540 fail to revert.
Wigs deserves a lifetime achievement award.. A pair of glasses a year for life
you’ve really got the face for radio chas
I’ll take DLS over Scott”I❤Kelly dude”Bass on any day ending in y.
“Born agains” shit me to tears.
Cant just admit they’ve fucked up and get on with it. Oh no, just gonna stop and hit the old Ctrl+Alt+Del with Jesus so i can slip in the front door and pretend i wasnt previously a fucken dick !
Just as the Caymans is a tax haven for rich cunts, Born Again is the low morals haven for former shitheads.
Wish I could upvote you more.
Follow the white lines to Jesus.
David Lee Scales’ parents are to be congratulated.
Katty corner.
Ugh, I had a feeling with your dumbass Cote post earlier this week that this bullshit about aerials (degrees rotation/naming) was going to be something you guys discussed on the podcast, which would basically be a rehashing of every stupid argument that takes place every single time someone in surfing does a “double” whatever. Fuck you, Chas, for perpetuating it. Fuck you, Todd, for being in the wrong and caring at all about something so lame. Fuck you, Scales, just for being you, you’ve never fought in your life so quit pretending like you’re a sagacious hypermasculine arbiter of proper surf culture/violence. Also, fuck you, again, Chas, for always saying each podcast is the “best yet.” Rarely is that ever true.
Has to be in for Post of the year
Top stuff, Karl
Surfing ain’t fukkn snowboarding or skating. No one cares it’s revert out or fukkn slob grab. Just give it up.
Jen See’s “air thing” – best description ever.
I figure if the Surf Expert Men can’t figure out what to call the damn airs, why should I? 😀
You’re just trying to get saddled with a pair of Spy windshields now, aren’t you KVF?
He’s that transparent isn’t he… shameless.
I stopped caring about degrees of rotation when they started calling cutbacks “wraps”. For fuck’s sake.
..but i hope they are calling wraps a different thing ,aren’t they? wraps are like an extended snap with no foam rebound, and cutbacks a proper Round the house Parko cutback..
If not this thing has gone out of control.
I can visualise what you’re saying, but I actually have no idea anymore.
Yeah Nik Karol, wraps are for gluten allergic pussies who can’t eat a real sandwich. Preach it sister!
Spy’s aren’t that expensive bro, save your blanket whiney forced criticisms and just go buy a pair.
Why would I want a pair of ugly, shitty sunglasses from 2002 that doesn’t do anything it purports to? Oh, I forgot, it’s backed by junk science so it must work!!! Woohoo for the New Age Power Balance! Nothing new is added from the debate. Todd lacks a cogent argument for why surfing aerials should follow snowboarding classification. When pressed by Scales about why Filipe and the like should be credited with a 540 when they only did a 360, he resorts to effectively saying “uh, because… snowboarding… haha… blah blah recognition for some pioneer’s trick blah blah.” Not very substantive. “I want guys to get credit they deserve for their rotations” (something like that, I can’t be bothered to listen again) that they didn’t really pull, you know “because.”
https://uploads.disquscdn.c… Spoken exactly like someone who wants a pair of shades. Fine, i’ll bite whats your address? I’ll send you a custom pair of these bad boys.
Those are so fucking amazing. I’d love a huge collection of those depicting lots of different animals. It would bring me great pleasure to bring my fellow man on the street to fits of apoplectic fury as he wondered what kind of 47yo retard would wear such things with pride.
Does this help?
https://vimeo.com/111215545
Or?
https://vimeo.com/207498981
I haven’t ejaculated properly since Clinton was in office…
Your wife and mrs astro aren’t sisters, are they ?
Fuck I just spit tea on my keyboard. That was well played.
#blueballsunited
It puzzles me that i dislike Chas yet find myself wanting to listen to what he is going to say next. An excellent combo for podcaster to have.
Riveting
I nodded off at 31.42
I defy anybody to last longer without pharmaceuticals.
I doubt your piss would be clean!
hah – I will admit to preparing myself beforehand.
But no pills or powders.
My challenge stands.
I will listen and enjoy immensely.
I’m enjoying this positivity.
you’d enjoy a dictionary.
Indeed!
Todd Richards sounds like the kind of person that spends hours online debating the degrees of rotation of people’s airs, instead of just sitting back and saying, ‘fuck, that was cool’.
and then goes on a podcast with his friend Chris to discuss it further. The boarding industry produces some of the best narcissists around!
Like who gives a fuck if we call it a gorkin flip? Surfing isn’t skateboarding which isn’t snowboarding and if you’ve got the coin to do all three your probably a massive arse. Like Shaun White…
“You’re”
😉
…and yes arseynessification to da max.
Can believe I wrote ‘your’. My day is ruined
?+Can’t+ believe….
I think that may have been autocorrect. My iPhone 6 isn’t working to well of late. The BeachGrit site causes the battery to heat up and the phone to run really slow. No idea why
Shaun White adds a rare but pungent spice into the stew! I like him a lot!
he’s a horrible surfer tho.
Are you on a commentating comeback Trojan?
fits and spurts. and fwiw, I’ve never listened to a Chas podcast, nor will I!
sissy fight one is telling..
Gotta be able to put it in a box, turts
Dude was insufferable