Two Ballina teenagers have been feted by the Queen’s rep
in Australia and awarded bravery medals for intervening in a Great
White attack on a mutual pal two years ago.
Jae Waters and Thomas Harper were fourteen and sixteen when they
saw a Great White hit Cooper Allen, seventeen, at Lighthouse
Beach.
“I was pretty close to him, probably ten metres away. We were
just cruising,” Jae, left in the main photo, who became known
around Ballina as “the kid with the mullet”, told the Sydney
Morning Herald. “I thought he was messing around, like jumping off
his board. Then I saw a bit more commotion and splashing
around behind him. I saw the shark’s head behind Cooper at the
start, then it swam between us. I didn’t look back but Tom did and
said he saw the shark following us.”
As he lay on the sand surveying deep gashes to his leg after
being attacked by a “massive” shark, 17-year-old Cooper Allen this
morning made one heartfelt request: Don’t tell mum.
“He said, ‘you can call my dad, but don’t tell mum yet’,”
said local surfer Dan Webber, who was in the water 5m away when the
attack happened at Ballina, NSW and raised the alarm.
Mr Webber said Cooper, who lives across the road from the
beach at North Wall and is one of the most regular teenagers in the
water, was extremely lucky, and is likely to make a full recovery.
He added that Cooper is an HSC student at one of the local
schools.
“I’m no doctor, but I think he’s going to be fine,” Mr
Webber said, still shaking from the experience.
There were four “huge” gashes in his leg about 5cm apart.
“So the shark was a massive f**king thing,” he said.
Mr Webber was on his way out to join Cooper and his two
mates when the attack happened. He was wading in waist-deep water
when he saw a dark object in the water. What unfolded then was
similar to what famously happened to pro surfer Mick Fanning last
year, he said.
“His two mates swam up to him, and I joined them,” he said.
“He’s just swimming backwards away from it. I think it (the shark)
was tangled up in his legrope. I saw the dorsal and the tail fin
thrashing around.
“He’s looked at me and said, ‘get someone to call an
ambulance’. He was so calm and in control.”
Mr Webber screamed at two surf lifesavers who were erecting
flags on the beach. He was surprised that the response was not
urgent.
“Everyone was just standing around. It was like a whole
minute of me screaming. But I was screaming for an ambulance. I
should have screamed shark.”
Now that Tahiti is done (how exciting is the
race ‘tween Filipe and Gabe?) we can turn our full attention to
Lemoore, California and the wonders of Surf Ranch.
Tell me true, have you purchased a ticket yet?
Did the announcement that blink-182 will
play Saturday night sway you?
Are you a Satanist?
But do you recall Satanism? I mostly do from my elementary
school days when the angry boy sitting next to me drew upside-down
stars on his Pee-Chee and my friend Jon Ross got Twisted Sister’s
Stay Hungry for his birthday. Rumors and research (asking another
friend’s older brother who liked Dyno bicycles) revealed that the
upside-down star was actually called a “pentagram” and was the
symbol of Satan himself.
Twisted Sister’s Stay Hungry featured lead singer Dee Snider
likely eating a virgin’s thigh and singing songs about burning in
hell.
Oooee it was a scary time to be alive. Nightmares of evil
Satanists taking over the world terrorized my young mind. Satan
sending his legions messages via Led Zeppelin songs played
backwards. Sacrificed neighborhood cats. Etc.
When I was a bit older, I actually read The Satanic Bible by
Anton LaVey, founder of The Church of Satan, and was brutally
underwhelmed.
LaVey, who very much looked the part with his bald head and
pointy goatee (pictured above), had basically just taken the real
Bible and written the opposite. Hate your neighbor, don’t turn the
other cheek, etc. Very uninspired and I wondered who could ever
take such pulp seriously.
Apparently blink-182’s new guitarist/vocalist Matt Skiba. He is
a real life, modern Satanist, can you even believe, and let us read
his own words on Alternative
Nation, shall we?
I love the art and the fashion and the aesthetic of the
Church Of Satan. That’s what always drew me to it. I have a lot of
books about black magic and demonology, and I err on the side of
that being real, but I wasn’t putting curses on people. And there
was a time when I would say I was a Satanist. Me and Derek bought
each other Church of Satan membership cards for Christmas because
we didn’t want to pay the $300 or whatever it was to join, so that
kind of shows you how loyal a member I am. For me, it was all
aesthetics, and my interests were solely on the black arts. Then a
friend of mine gave me a book that I have on my coffee table to
this day. She introduced more of what a witch would call white
magic – or, as I’ll put it, positivity, kindness, beauty.
You also keep revenge and all the seven deadly sins in your
pocket because they’re good to have, but you need balance. Before
that good juju came into my life, there were a lot of kids who
really loved it, but somebody said to me recently, ‘Your band
probably would have been a lot bigger had you not had the satanic
imagery,’ and my answer to that was, ‘Good!’ I feel people made a
bigger deal of it than it actually is. I’m still a fan of black
magic, but I’ve also learned such a lot in the last 20 years that
that little black-magic kid seems like a different person to me
now. I mean, I have crystals at my house that I meditate with. I’m
such a fucking hippy. But it works for me and if you were me you’d
do it, too. You’d try fucking anything.
Oops!
Do you think Surf Ranch will produce limited edition merchandise
feat. pentagrams? Are there already Satanic symbols marking the
property? Are the neighborhood cats safe?
I’ll get to the bottom of this, don’t you worry. Don’t you even
lose one night of sleep.
Matt Skiba pictured making a Satanic
face.
Oh and P.S. you’re welcome for this other little bit of
Satanism.
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WSL
Soul: Kelly Slater’s Mom Fast Pals with
Aretha Franklin (RIP etc)!
"When she came down to sing we'd hang out," says
Judy Slater.
Real sad the Big Mama of soul Aretha Franklin died three
days ago. Oowee, the way she threw her head back in the
throes of some mysterious climax; the electricity she poured
through our spines.
Ain’t surprising she dead, though.
Can’t weigh two hundred and figgits pounds your whole adult life
and think nothing bad’s gonna happen.
Now, a Florida newspaper has revealed that Kelly Slater’s
mother, Judy, was pals with Aretha back in the sixties when the
Queen of Soul was hitting dive bars all along the east coast.
Barefooted and underage, Judy
Slater would find a nice, quiet seat inside the Vanguard bar
in Cocoa Beach back in the mid-’60s, rubbing elbows with
astronauts and surfers, to see a young Aretha Franklin belt
out a few melodies each night.
“It was a crummy little bar,
but everyone went there,” Slater said Thursday, just hours after
the legendary singer passed away at her home in Detroit at the age
of 76, reportedly from pancreatic cancer.
Who knew “The Queen of Soul” had
close ties to the mom of Kelly Slater, “The King of
Surfing?”
Judy Slater (now Judy Slater Lane) had just moved to the
area in 1966 from Bethesda, Maryland, rooming with three others in
a townhouse. The Vanguard bar, located at the end of SR 520, often
played rock ‘n roll, but owner Nort Kurlan also saw something
special in the melodic lyrics of a budding superstar who spent
vacations in the Cocoa Beach area.
“She was just my friend,” Slater said. “When she came down,
we’d hang out, and we became friends with the owners, Nort and
Laura. We even spent Christmas Eve and Christmas Day at their
house. She (Aretha) and I really didn’t have any place to
go.”
In 1968, Slater was seven months pregnant
with her first son, Sean, who also became a world-class
surfer.
“We were up in that area (of Maryland) and
saw where she was performing at Constitution Hall in Washington,”
Slater said. “Well, we got tickets, sat in the fourth row and it
was so loud. I really thought I’d never see her again (because of
being so famous). But she was great.”
When news came Thursday of her death, Slater
was saddened.
“I felt bad, but she had quite a life and I
really admired her,” said Slater, who loved the song
“R-E-S-P-E-C-T” the most.
“When I knew her, she was just a young girl
who had a dream,” Slater said, “and she went for it. I’ll
never forget her.”
The last time the Gold Coast pro surfer Paul Fisher
called me was five or six years ago. It was eight pm and I
was about to sit down to a delicious dinner with my (then) wife and
(still) two sons. It was a Skype call from America, three in the
morning or thereabouts in LA, which gave it some importance.
I removed my bib, drained my pitcher of department store red
wine. (Family man.)
Was Fisher in trouble? Did my little pal require serious
counsel?
As the pixels settled down to a clear picture, Fisher appeared
and ordered a girl to “Show Derek ya tits! Ha ha ha ha ha!”
And so on.
Recently, Fisher, who used to perform in a DJ duo called Cut
Snake with the former pro Leigh Sedley, released the track
Losing It which has been wowing crowds at music
festivals around the world.
From the website EDM Sauce.
“Losing It” has been one of the most played ID‘s in DJ sets all
summer. From tech house DJ’s to Hardwell last week at the main
stage of Ultra Europe, “Losing It” has fans losing it all over the
world. With distinct tech house sounds as well as a super groovy
house drop, “Losing It” is a track that’ll be in my rotation for a
LONG time.
From Australia’s national youth broadcaster Triple J:
FISHER has dropped a banger that house music heads have been
frothing for since its live debut last year. Despite only
being released today, ‘Losing It’ has already amassed over 13,000
hits on Shazam and millions of views online. That’s largely thanks
to DJs spinning rips in their sets from video of FISHER playing
playing the track live in one of his two Coachella 2017
sets.
Following on from ‘Crowd Control‘ (Best New Music in April), ‘Ya Kidding‘ and ‘Stop It‘, ‘Losing It’ lays down a
throbbing bass-aided beat that’s sure to bring blisters to your
feet, whether in your loungeroom, at the club, or alongside
thousands of fellow fans when he tour as part of Listen Out festival.
Dance music fans on Reddit thrilled to his live sets at
Coachella.
HE SENDS IT WITH A HANDFLICK!!! Never have I seen such a
bold nonchalant dj maneuver.
holy fuck what an ID. This dude is far and away my #1 DJ I
want to see live this year.
Just saw him in Brooklyn this past weekend at Schmanzki.
It’s quite possibly the worst venue in NY. Easily the worst ive
been to, so heads up to anyone else. Despite the venue, he was
hands down one of the most fun sets i’ve been to and i’m not even a
huge house fan. Dude’s energy is infectious.
Watch here!
(And, here, surfing Shippies with Ryan Hipwood and Mark
Mathews.)
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The remarkable Gabriel Medina wins the Tahiti Pro,
peacocking a set for a win in the last thirty seconds of the final.
Gabriel is now second in the world, just behind Filipe Toledo. |
Photo: WSL
Gabriel Medina wins Tahiti Pro: “In the age
of the rise of machines the sheer beauty of Tahiti needs
defending!”
Your writer gripped from start to finish on final's
day!
Sometimes it feels like being in a minority of one to
admit to loving and being gripped from start to finish by small
Teahupoo. But that’s the fucking truth, your Honour.
The heat-turning drama, the capriciousness of thousands of miles
of empty South Pacific ocean, unforseen and unforseeable until
seconds before impact. The sheer beauty. And it does, in the age of
the rise of the machines, need defending.
The Tahitian program, as Filipe described it. If you haven’t
experienced it, it’s the kindest program on Earth.
Toledo, with his semi-final finish, maintains a 6000-point
margin to event winner Gabriel Medina, who leapfrogs a struggling
Julian Wilson. Filipe’s razor-sharp whips on a quad that looked to
be the best board in the competition was more than enough to
account for for February in quarter one, despite judges engineering
phoney drama by stripping Toledo of priority with three minutes to
go by inspecting a wide set wave.
Owen Wright’s jedi tube skills came to the fore in quarter two
with a deeply threaded foamball ride under Wade Carmichael’s nose.
Positioning at Teahupoo, from three-foot to ten-foot is a question
of inches. The most frightening sight I’ve ever seen in surfing is
looking over my shoulder into the gaping techni-coloured maw of a
Teahupoo ten-footer with Owen Wright throwing himself over the
ledge.
Did you know Italo had a four-blot winning record against
Medina?
Italo plays the opening stanza submissive, pacifying Medina. A
pacified Medina is a confused Medina. He defines himself in
conflict. Italo opens with a confused west bowl ride, flubbing the
tube and turning a six into a three. From there, Medina is perfect.
There is a premium attached to mastery of Teahupoo, even when small
and judges have to pay attention. The ocean goes quiet and remedial
action is denied to Ferreira.
Grumpiness, indignation even outrage are fashionable. I count
myself one of the worst offenders.
Allowing for that an honest accounting of what is on display is
appropriate, even necessary. The broadcast is stunning: camera
angles, replays, even Barton’s commentary. Seamless, as miraculous
as modern dentistry, minus the price tag. I’ve always counted
myself one who would never pay but watching Medina I found myself
recanting. I think I would pay… for a stripped down Tour in Grand
Slam locations.
The alternative: the great dumbing down in search of a mass
audience is too easy a dead horse to lay the boot into.
J-Flo simply waits and surfs perfectly the few set waves that
come in his QF against Kolohe. Easy win.
Owen has a long elbow pinned to the face of Filipe with twenty
minutes to go in their semi-final. At the eighteen-minute mark
Filipe tries to break free with a brace of rides. In five minutes
he rides four waves, a clutch of fours, then a five. The heat drips
down and despite Toledo’s valiant chipping away he can’t bridge the
divide. A semi-final finish at small Chopes won’t silence the
critics but it will be critical in World Title calculations.
Medina’s perfection continues against Flores in semi-final two.
This time under priority, which had, up till now, been reliable
bodyguard for winning leads. Two waves, two clean air makes and a
repertoire of sizzling turns ridden into the board width crack in
dry reef. On an oily calm morning in Tahiti the sound of hoots and
the whirring clicks of camera motor drives drives Flores into
distraction. The veneer of patience is shattered. His best wave is
underscored by a point and a younger Flores would have shown a more
vigorous displeasure with the injustice. Maybe he has learnt that
judges hold grudges too. In the end it mattered not. Medina was
through.
The Tahitian program. I stay with Ginette and Papa. Ginette has
kindly eyes, so does Papa. He’s a mariner, an engineer of sorts
responsible for the channel markers and navigation buoys. In the
afternoon, I buy the Hinano tallies from the supermarche. Papa sits
on the concrete floor and grates the coconut flesh and squeezes the
fresh milk for the poisson cru. He
speaks no English. I speak little French, a smattering of pidgin
Tahitian. We communicate with silence, smiling eyes. Hand
gestures.
Ginette is disapproving of me because I have become willing
hostage to the day drunks down by the boat harbour. We share warm
beer from a canvas sack in the morning sun. Smoke joints. In the
afternoon there is the long paddle out to No Pass in front of
Ginette and Papa’s house. Their teenaged daughter is there when I
come home to get my board.
“I come,” she says.
I point to the board, then out to sea. She nods.
It’s a very long paddle. Miles. It’s late afternoon when we get
out there. Soon, it is apparent the teenage girl can’t surf. She
sits in the channel. I ride waves.
The last boat leaves and I am gesturing to her to paddle in. She
sits, immobile. The tide is running out, the tradewind blowing with
it. It takes all my effort to drag her back against wind and tide
through the pass.
The sun sets and it grows dark. She cannot, will not, paddle. I
tow her in. There is no panic from her. Just silence and
immobility. It’s taking too long. The shore stubbornly refuses to
come closer. Like Gabe Medina prays to God for a set wave I am
praying that I can get Ginette and Papa’s daughter back to
shore.
Is anyone looking for us?
Then a small boat with a torch shining crazily across the
lagoon. I yell and the boat comes closer. They drag her into the
boat. And speed off. I paddle the rest of the way in the dark and
sneak home.
When I get back the poisson cru is on the table and the Tahitian
soap operas are on the television. Not a word is said. Then or
ever.
And Ginette still messages me every year: “Steve, are you coming
to Teahupoo?”
Owen out-muscles Medina for the opening wave of the Final. A
well ridden fluffy tube. The wind is puffing up. Which
paradoxically makes the judges decide to penalise Medina’s air game
they had so richly rewarded in the semis. His 6.17 seems
ridiculously underscored to my eyes. Past the half-way mark and
Owen staggers his way through a messy tube ride like a drunk
walking home from a Surfers paradise night club. The score puts him
ahead.
Now Medina is rattled. Attempts to manufacture the score fail.
And fail again. The Final seems done and dusted.
Owen takes a mid-sized set apart which looks like the victory
lap. Behind it the wave of the Final appears like an apparition.
Charlie Medina goes apeshit in the channel as Gabe stands in the
shade of the only perfect tube of the Final. It is enough.
Tahiti is always enough.
But will it be enough to withstand the gaze of non surfing suits
looking at “commercial considerations”.
Tahiti Pro Final Results:
1 – Gabriel Medina (BRA) 13.50
2 – Owen Wright (AUS) 12.07
Tahiti Pro Semifinal Results:
SF 1: Owen Wright (AUS) 12.60 def. Filipe Toledo (BRA) 10.03
SF 2: Gabriel Medina (BRA) 15.17 def. Jeremy Flores (FRA) 6.10
Tahiti Pro Quarterfinal Results:
QF 1: Filipe Toledo (BRA) 11.43 def. Michael February (ZAF)
8.60
QF 2: Owen Wright (AUS) 16.00 def. Wade Carmichael (AUS) 9.57
QF 3: Gabriel Medina (BRA) 13.57. Italo Ferreira (BRA) 7.57
QF 4: Jeremy Flores (FRA) 13.34 def. Kolohe Andino (USA) 5.74
