Shocking new alleged developments!
It sure has felt like Mother Nature is on the ropes lately, no? Oh I’m not talking climate change, plastics, fires, floods, droughts, famine etc. I’m talking wave pools. Wave pools allegedly being built in every single town from Lemoore right on down to River City and threatening each and every time to upend the ocean’s place atop the pole. Wave pools churning out perfect little barrels on demand so mom and pop and li’l sis can get their fill without waiting for stupid storms somewhere out at sea.
Take the Olympics, for example. Surfing has finally been accepted amongst its sporting brethren and will be featured for the first time ever at the Tokyo Games in 2020.
Detractors pounced. “But what if there’s no waves?” “But what if there are no stupid storms somewhere out at sea?”
Organizers promised there would be no issues, that the coastal town of Tsurigasaki Beach in the Chiba prefecture produces magnificent surf, but quietly behind the scenes the Kelly Slater Wave Company was given a green light to build a pool in Tokyo. Construction was set to begin in September but… hold the backhoe! A sizzling new rumor suggests that the plug is being pulled because of promises made by the central government to the local Chiba authorities.
This, if true, effectively kills surfing’s grand Olympic debut showcasing Kelly’s marvelous plow. But does it automatically negate any wave pool ahead of the Games? Surf Lakes, as you learned last night, is on a heater and what if Barton and Occy made nice with the local Chiba authorities to bring in the plunger?
What if BSR Cable Park has promised through-the-roof ratings with its patented brain-eating amoeba shuffle?
Oh this tangled web is just starting to get interesting but, for the time being, Mother Nature is the victor. Unless there are no stupid storms somewhere out at sea and Kanoa Igarashi is wreathed with Olympic gold after skimboarding an 8.7.