The moment of truth etc.
Today’s episode of the world title showdown at the Banzai Pipeline will be a bag of mixed fruit.
Italo would make for a marvellous world champion, the kinetic motion of his thighs in Metallica trunks a sight to behold. And, laying in a rack in my hallway is a five-ten Tim Patterson with familiar orange camouflage spray, a gift from Italo to my children when I interviewed the Brazilian in Margaret River. All would be thrilled if it became a world title year surfboard. Some value on the secondhand market etc.
My current high-rotation surfboard is a five-ten Medina shaped by Johnny Cabianca. It is in Gabriel’s exact dimensions and, as I’m fond of telling people, I ride it because it eliminates the excuse of poor equipment for my bad surf riding. A third world title for a man who can win at Teahupoo and Pipe as well as in a swimming pool would be well deserved.
And, Kolohe, well, I have to resist the temptation of running my knuckles up and down his lovely vertebrae. And daddy Dino is a long-time friend.
I joke. ish.
This is a title showdown for the ages.
Kolohe needs to win the event, which isn’t out of the realm of possibilities, although Peterson Crisanto has to be beat Italo in the first heat of the day and Gabriel must lose in the quarters.
Stranger things have happened.
For Italo and Gabriel, it’s a game of who cracks first.
A penalty shoot-out.
A very tough day for God, who must now choose between the three men, all devout.
Who has the divine will?
Billabong Pipe Masters Round of 16 Matchups:
HEAT 1: Italo Ferreira (BRA) vs. Peterson Crisanto (BRA)
HEAT 2: Yago Dora (BRA) vs. Julian Wilson (AUS)
HEAT 3: Ricardo Christie (NZL) vs. Jack Freestone (AUS)
HEAT 4: Seth Moniz (HAW) vs. Kelly Slater (USA)
HEAT 5: Gabriel Medina (BRA) vs. Caio Ibelli (BRA)
HEAT 6: John John Florence (HAW) vs. Soli Bailey (AUS)
HEAT 7: Jesse Mendes (BRA) vs. Griffin Colapinto (USA)
HEAT 8: Michel Bourez (FRA) vs. Kolohe Andino (USA)